The Nut Job Page #3

This is an important mission

to find food. Right?

You're right. We're

past those silly labels.

Ours is a love...

RAT:
Well, Well, Well.

(LAUGHS)

Isn't this a tender little scene?

I'll handle this.

Hello, urban rodent thing!

Is that mange or bubonic

plague you're wearing?

Anyway, my lady and I were hoping

you could point out the...

Hey! Put the...

Hey! Give her back that backpack!

Backpack! Give it pack!

Pack! Back!

(GRUNTING)

Hey!

(GROANS)

ANDIE:
Grayson!

Ole!

A-ha!

(TRAM BELL RINGS)

(GASPS)

GRAYSON:
Go on without me!

Save the park!

(YAWNS)

(FARTS)

Buddy, I ate too much cheese.

(FARTING)

I think I'm gonna

have a cheese baby.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER ON RADIO)

Going down.

Son of a gun.

Lana...

Gee, Lana, you look swell.

Lana, crazy dame.

Hey, ain't you got

a nickel to call first?

No need. Your ma told me

where to find you, King.

Look at that! It's Lana!

(BARKING)

And who are you,

you slobbery little monster?

FINGERS:
She's a vicious guard dog.

(CHUCKLES)

She's not very good at her job.

LUCKY:
She's not the only one.

FINGERS:

What's that supposed to mean?

- LUCKY:
Nothin'.

- FINGERS:
What do you mean, nothing?

LUCKY:
I said nothin'.

LANA:
I wouldn't have believed it,

but you really have gone legit.

Talk about second chances,

it's boss.

KING:
Yeah, well, you keep

it under your hat, though,

'cause, I mean, we ain't open yet,

and we wanna have a surprise

grand opening. Right, boys?

(BARKING)

Oh! Not again!

(HIGH-FREQUENCY WHISTLE)

(WHIMPERING)

Hey! My Whistle!

FINGERS:

I wanna be reimbursed for that!

(SNARLING)

- Ahh! Oh! Rat!

- FINGERS:
Boss!

- It's a rat!

- FINGERS:
Hang on!

Get it off of me!

Get this rat off of me!

It's down my pants!

Get it out of here!

Get it off of me! Please!

(BARKING)

Next chance we get, we go back in

there and stash away those nuts.

Can't go back to the park, though.

Ah, forget it. Let's go get

that shiny thing. Here we go!

No. And that's not...

(GRUNTS)

(LAUGHING)

The thingamabooby is mine!

(SURLY GROANS)

Surly!

- What are you doing here?

- What are you doing here?

- I'm looking for food.

- I'm looking for food.

- No! I'm looking for food!

- No! I'm looking for food!

Hey, did you find food?

No. No food.

Can I have that back, please?

Why? What is this thing?

It's just my musical instrument

for playing the blues.

I got no friends, no food

This whistle has nothing

to do with food

Oh, I've got the no food blues

For heaven's sakes!

You found food, didn't you?

And this thing has

something to do with it.

That's crazy!

Spill the beans, or I...

Whoa!

Let's not get too nutty around here.

Pardon the expression.

Surly, I'm having a heck of a day!

The park lost all its food,

Grayson lost his mind,

now I've lost Grayson.

I've been out hungry and alone

and getting real irritable!

So, either you start talking,

or come winter,

I'll be wearing a new

squirrel-skin coat. Capisce?

The door.

ANDIE:
What? What door?

SURLY:
Nothing.

Just that my door is always open

to you, Andie. But we gotta go.

Come back here! Hey!

And hold on to that thing, okay?

(PANTING)

(WHISTLES)

(LAUGHS)

(WHIMPERS)

Ooh! Ow! Tail!

Head! Tail! Head! Tail!

Yes! Yes! Yes!

Buddy, we found it!

The lost city of Nutlantis!

(LAUGHING)

FINGERS:

I've been working on a bank heist

All the live long day

LUCKY:

Stop with the singing, will you?

Can you believe this?

I can't believe this!

Can you hear what

I'm saying to you?

(LAUGHING)

FINGERS:
And what's with that guy

cracking his knuckles all the time?

You know that's gonna lead to a

serious arthritic condition.

Thanks, chum. Sorry about that.

Went a little nuts.

I didn't say

anything stupid, did I?

(GRUNTING)

FINGERS:
Hey, how much is 20%?

LUCKY:
You kidding me?

FINGERS:

Is it a lot or is it a little?

LUCKY:
You're not serious, are you?

Twenty of 100 is 20%.

Ah, burying nuts for winter, huh?

All right, listen up.

We're gonna dig our own hole, a

tunnel from here to the alley,

loot the whole place, get

fat for winter. Got it?

20%. Twenty of 100, that's what

20% is. You didn't go to school?

(GROWLS)

What's wrong with her?

Probably complaining about the

substandard working conditions here.

LUCKY:

All right, brainiac, let's move.

FINGERS:
You got an attitude.

Here we go!

(GROWLING)

(PRECIOUS BARKING)

Whoa!

(YELLING)

All right, Surly, you're gonna

tell me what's going on in there.

(PRECIOUS BARKING)

Yes! Yes! Just give me that thing!

There's food in there

for the park, isn't there?

And you're gonna share it, right?

- Never!

- Fine!

All right! Share! I'll share!

- Fifty-fifty.

- Fifty-fifty?

I've never gone 50-50 in my life.

Fifty-fifty! Fifty-fifty!

Deal!

Ha-ha!

(GASPS)

- I got four words for ya.

- Okay!

Thing-a-ma-booby.

- Ugh!

- How do you like that, huh?

- Okay, you win, you win!

Get that thing out of my face!

- Huh? Oh.

You got me.

So, you can talk.

Okay, I'll stop talking, then.

Just don't blow that whistle.

SURLY:

I'm not gonna feel sorry for you.

- Of course, yes, I understand.

- Stay.

All right, it's safe to come down.

I'm gonna level with you, 'cause

you seem like a reasonable guy.

If I don't get rid of you,

they are gonna send me back

to the pound, all right?

And I can't go back to that pound.

SURLY:
Oh, yeah, sure.

I believe you.

No, I'm a victim of circumstance.

Not my problem, dog. You guys okay?

Don't worry about her.

This is incredible!

There's enough food here

to feed the park for years!

Hey! Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What're you doing?

Look, can we be friends?

- Oh, great.

- Come on!

I can do all sorts of stuff.

You wanna see? You know what?

I can fetch things. Huh?

I can sit.

Look at this thing! This is crazy!

Whoo, whoo, whoo.

Has a mind of its own.

Oh, Oh, Oh!

I can play dead! Watch.

(GROANS)

Now I'm alive.

I mean, this is unbelievable.

It's like one to the next.

Dead, then alive. Right?

I'm getting some of this food

back to the park.

- SURLY:
What?

- We had a deal.

Well, I can attack her,

if you want.

I said, shut it.

Look, the deal is, you take

your share, I get mine,

we split ways.

There's no way I can get

these to the park safely.

We need a foolproof plan.

Good luck with that. Buddy

and I are digging a tunnel.

(LAUGHS)

That's just... That's crazy.

No. It's brilliant!

Oh, Raccoon and the animals will

flip when they hear about this!

We'll be back, first thing tomorrow,

to get started on a tunnel.

That's not part of the deal.

Should I attack her now?

What? No! You stay!

I never said that

I'd work with the park.

Well, you're welcome to come

back with me, if you want.

Who knows, you might just

end up being a hero.

I'll be back with the team.

Well done, Surly!

Put a tail on her.

You know what I mean.

Hey, boss, I'm gonna

lick your face.

Come on, don't be weird.

MOLE:
I propose we assemble a team

and take the nuts for the park!

ALL:
Yeah!

See? See, everybody?

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