The Oranges

The question of happiness

has preoccupied

philosophers, poets

and pharmaceutical companies

for thousands of years.

Clearly, it's a tricky one.

When I graduated from

design school three years ago,

I had a definite plan.

Couple months at home,

put together a kickass portfolio,

then I'd take Manhattan

by storm.

And here is home.

West Orange, New Jersey.

Nice, huh?

OK, it's not Manhattan,

but, like I say, it's temporary.

I grew up here

with two families.

That's my dad in blue,

and that's his best friend, Terry.

The Inseparables.

They go jogging together

three times a week without fail.

You can set your clock by it.

You could say life in the Oranges

is dependable.

I can't believe

you made me do this.

Good for your appetite.

See you in an hour.

You can depend on Terry

to have a gadget for everything.

Walked 1.2 miles.

Only stopped twice.

That's great, honey.

And you can depend on Cathy

to never hear

a single word he says.

Make sure you put your bicycle

in the garage.

And pull the pork

out of the freezer, honey.

Across the street, our house.

Every year,

my mom gets more involved

with her carolling group.

They start rehearsing

in August.

# Jingle bells

Jingle all the way... #

And every year, my dad

hates them a little bit more.

OK, sure. I'm still here.

I'm a few years behind in my plan.

But you can't

rush these things.

Portfolios need

to be perfect, right?

Plus I have a day job

working in furniture, so...

..as far as I was concerned,

everything was on track.

# Happy birthday to you... #

That is,

until what happened... happened.

Nina Ostroff.

When all this started,

she was at a safe distance,

3, 000 miles away

in San Francisco.

# Happy birthday to you. #

Make a wish, babe.

And I was the fifth wheel

to our parents'

regular Saturday foursome.

Say it again.

OK.

Un coup de birch.

Hey, Vanny.

I read the most

interesting article

called 'The IKEA Conspiracy',

which you'd be

really fascinated by.

- What it imagines is a...

- Terry?

We need to call Nina.

We said 9:
30.

I'm on it.

Vanessa, did you look at

that one-bedroom in Fort Lee?

Yeah. It was, um, like a closet

in the basement.

There's always something, honey.

Don't be so choosy.

Nothing's perfect.

There was, you know,

one window.

- Paige, did I tell you...

- No room to breathe.

...that Joan Marshack

was the listing agent on that?

David, you are going

to really love this.

This speaker box communicates

wirelessly with my cell phone.

And guess where

I read about it first.

'Consumer Reports'. Thank you

so much for the subscription.

- I'm really enjoying it.

- You are consumingly welcome.

I don't even have to take

my cell phone out of my pocket.

Watch.

Dial Nina.

Please repeat request.

TERRY; Dial Nina.

Maybe your pants

are blocking the signal.

They're cotton.

Nina's cell phone, dialling.

Nina - their daughter

and my best friend

from ages 0 to high school.

We spent hours together

planning our big escape.

I'm gonna live in New York.

And Paris.

And I'm gonna be a famous chef

and have a million lovers

who'll take me

all over the world

so I never have to come back

to New Jersey again.

It's like

there's no air here, right?

Totally.

You'll come too, right?

Are you kidding?

Until sophomore year,

when she abandoned me for

Liz Gaines and the Fun Bunch.

She also kissed and later gave

a hand job to Peter Fortunate.

I'd been secretly

in love with him forever.

Then, just as her parents

were lining her up

at some lame college

in Pennsylvania,

she decided she was

going to travel the world.

Or at least those parts

that were out of

her mother's cell phone range.

Hello?

Happy birthday, sweetie!

- Happy birthday!

- Happy birthday, Nina

It's David and Paige.

Vanessa's here too.

It's true. I'm here.

Hey, Ethan.

I think Nina's f***ing parents

are on the phone.

I didn't know I was having

a party. It was a surprise.

Honey, we can't hear you.

Ethan threw me

a surprise party.

It's so great.

Did you guys get

the pictures I sent?

Yes, we did.

More young men should have earrings

in their face.

What? I'm sorry, I can't

hear you. Am I on speaker?

Nina, what day are you

flying in for Thanksgiving?

Thanksgiving. Mom, um...

Uh, I don't think I'm gonna

make it for Thanksgiving.

Ethan's photography show's

next weekend, and it's a big deal.

Sweetie, we haven't

seen you for two years.

You haven't been home

in five years.

Since we visited you.

That's a long time.

Um...

Can you take me

off speaker, please?

Sorry, sweetie,

I'd have to disconnect you

to take you off speaker -

it's a very complex system.

OK.

Look, you're not

gonna like this, but...

Ethan and I

are getting married.

He proposed two weeks ago

on his birthday.

He took me out to Baker Beach,

which overlooks

the Golden Gate Bridge,

and he got down on one knee

and everything.

- He proposed on his birthday?

- I don't understand.

I'm in love with him.

That's really great,

sweetie, but...

You're only 24 years old.

Nobody gets married

at 24 anymore.

People get married

when they're 17.

Not white girls

from New Jersey.

- Shh!

- Would you listen to yourself?

No, you listen -

you have made some

very questionable decisions

in your life.

Please don't add to the list

by marrying some loser kid

with zero future.

OK. I have an idea.

If you think he's such a loser,

then don't come to the wedding!

Jesus, turn that thing down!

Down volume!

Down volume!

- Oh, God!

- Down volume!

You guys, it's getting late.

The party's over, OK?

Love you. 'Bye.

Amy, did you see Ethan?

Baby?

Ethan?

Ethan?

Uh, it's...

Gimme a sec.

Come on. I want to

get everybody out of here.

Hey, how's it going with

the, uh, couples counsellor?

I don't know.

She's so non-specific.

It's like talking to fog.

David and I know

where we stand with each other.

That's how we've lasted this long.

Somehow, it works.

Well, don't look at me.

I just pretend Terry's invisible.

- Notice anything different?

- I sure do.

Nice new mini fridge.

I think it really

ties the room together.

- It's the Max 5950.

- It's the one you recommended.

From the patio series.

Good move.

Let's take a look

in the mini ice compartment.

Oh, boy.

It's really big, isn't it?

Now, this stuff is huge

in Europe.

And we've just landed

the American campaign.

- No kidding? Congrats.

- Thanks.

Russians like it for breakfast.

Before the devil

knows you're dead.

Boy, it's, um...

Well...

Really not very good, is it?

- It's not good at all. No.

- No.

What's up with these sheets?

You, um...

...spending a little extra time

out here?

Just a couple of nights a week.

Late-night TV.

You've gotta be

f***ing kidding me.

Oh, sh...

Nina? Wow!

- David. Hi.

- It's been so long.

I thought you weren't

coming back for Thanksgiving.

Yeah, well...

Um...

Are my parents here?

Locked out.

They're in the back.

Last day of barbecue season.

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