The Princess and the Pirate Page #7

Synopsis: Princess Margaret is travelling incognito to elope with her true love instead of marrying the man her father has betrothed her to. On the high seas, her ship is attacked by pirates who know her identity and plan to kidnap her and hold her for a king's ransom. Little do the cutthroats know that she will be rescued by that unlikeliest of knights errant, Sylvester the Great, who will lead them on a merry, and madcap, chase.
Production: RKO Pictures
 
IMDB:
7.0
APPROVED
Year:
1944
94 min
264 Views


What's the idea of giving me

a thing like this?

- Know what they do to you for having it?

- Isn't it wonderful?

Wonderful! Are you crazy,

or am I crazy for asking?

All things of value involve a risk.

This being the world's most valuable thing,

involves the greatest risk.

Not for me. I'm getting rid of it right now.

- I'm burning it, see...

- You won't burn it.

- Oh, I won't, won't I?

- No, you won't, my gypsy friend.

Because I trust you.

We are partners in this forever.

Together, we will be rich.

We'll be rich if I have to cut out your heart

to make you rich.

You can't scare me.

Anything that happens to me,

happens to you.

How would you like The Hook to find out

you gave me this map?

- But The Hook won't find out.

- Yeah? I'm going to make sure he doesn't.

And this man who is now

the Governor's prisoner...

you say he performed here?

- With a beautiful girl?

- Yes.

- What kind of an act did he do?

- He did impersonations.

Impersonations? What sort?

Well, to hear him tell it,

he could do anything.

An old hunchback, a young nobleman,

a buccaneer...

an old gypsy.

Gypsy? He imitated a gypsy, did he?

That's the foul dog, all right!

I knew he looked familiar.

Let us make haste.

I will cut out that rogue's tongue

and watch him eat it.

Wait, do not rush into a trap.

You are going hoodman blind

into this venture.

Steady, my young cockerel.

What is this you say?

I say La Roche will have you dance

the devil's tattoo on the air with your heels.

He has the Princess and he has the gypsy.

And so I say, he has the map, too.

By the Great Horn Spoon, you may be right.

Round up the men

and prepare to sail at midnight.

I will go to La Roche

and have this out with him...

and while I am there,

I will lay my hook a fathom deep...

in the liver of a certain slant-nosed gypsy.

But, La Roche, you cannot trust him.

But I have no proof that La Roche knows

that his guest and the gypsy are one.

But I tell you this,

if I'm not out of that palace in an hour...

you and the men are to storm the walls

and get me out.

- Good. And what of the map?

- Have no fear, I will have it.

And if La Roche is innocent,

you may be assured of one thing:

The gypsy still has the map on him.

But, honey,

I was only trying to teach you how to swim.

Oh, it's you.

What's the idea, mashing my potato?

Forgive me, my dear partner,

I didn't mean to hit you so hard...

but you shouldn't make me angry.

When my blood boils, I become insane.

You must have been percolating

the day you were born.

That thing, the map!

I told you we've got to get rid of it,

you creep.

This is practically a signed death warrant.

You're right. Whoever is found

with it on him will be hung.

They're not gonna find the map on me.

I'm gonna tear it up.

Even if you tear it, it will not disappear.

That's right. They might find the pieces.

I better burn it.

Burn it? You can't burn it now.

Yeah, they might smell smoke

and then find the ashes.

I know what I'll do.

Proclamation from the Governor!

Hear ye. Hear ye!

Death to the holder of the map!

- Did you hear that?

- Yes, it seems to have gotten around.

I'll get rid of this map if I have to eat it.

- Say, that's a good idea. We'll eat it.

- It can do no harm and I'm hungry.

Wait a minute. Why are you

in such a sweat to get rid of it now?

'Cause I'm smarter than you are,

and I'm only an idiot.

You wearing woolen underwear?

Here's a drumstick.

Hey, say...

have you tried any of the colored parts?

Tastes pretty good.

I'm still on the white meat.

Give me another piece. I like it.

Was your mother ever frightened by a goat?

We're doing it the hard way,

but I'm glad of one thing.

- I'm getting this map off my chest.

- Getting the map off your chest.

Come on, lay that egg

and get it over with, will you?

- Sylvester, are you in there?

- Just a minute.

Quick, come on.

Hurry, get in the closet.

Sylvester, open.

Here, in case you get hungry.

Sylvester, open up.

Come, Sylvester...

I want you to take a walk with me.

I have something to discuss.

Sylvester, will you help me

with a little problem of mine?

You won't be afraid

to answer my questions honestly, will you?

What was your impression of Capt. Barat?

You know, The Hook.

My impression exactly.

But suppose his story is true...

and the culprit who stole the map

is within my grasp.

Whatever gave you that idea?

What's the matter, man?

What have you got on your chest?

I think I'm breaking out.

I ate something that didn't agree with me.

- I better go on a diet.

- No, it is our climate.

I was often troubled myself

until I built a sulfur bath.

I take such a bath every night.

Tonight you will join me.

- You and I are gonna take a bath together?

- Why not?

I'll scrub your back

and you may scrub mine.

I don't like the odds.

- Quite a tasty layout you have here.

- Yes, I like to live well.

My need for money is great.

That's why it is important

that we find the map soon.

Didn't you know? Come along.

Convertible top.

You monster.

- Come, Sylvester.

- Here.

Come, man, the water is just right.

Remove your undergarments.

I'm bashful.

Oh, come, come.

Stop acting like a coy young maiden.

Take it off.

No, I like to keep it on.

It's the only way I can get my laundry done.

Stand back. Here I come!

Come on.

- Sylvester, where are you?

- Here.

- Sylvester.

- Here.

Sylvester, listen to me.

Here!

- Stop it, man. What are you doing?

- I was just looking for the soap.

Here it is. I'll soap your back first.

What's the matter with you?

What are you doing? What is it?

Curse you for a lubberly oaf!

This is the last time

you shall make sport of me.

What do you mean,

bursting in on us like this?

- What's the idea? Wanna get in trouble?

- Trouble, is it?

- Careful, Barat, he's my guest.

- Guest?

- He is the gypsy.

- Gypsy? Have you lost your wits, man?

I can prove what I say.

Wait a minute, I'm coming out. Wait.

This dog will talk or I'll slit his gullet.

Come gypsy, the map...

or I'll carve your hide to ribbons.

The map!

- He had it tattooed on his chest!

- No.

- You see, La Roche?

- By heaven, it is! I've been hoodwinked.

- Luckily the gallows are ready.

- I can explain everything.

- Go ahead.

- I...

Come to think of it, I can't.

Hold it!

Stop him! Don't let him get away, Barat.

Slit his gullet.

Stop him.

What's the meaning of this?

Quick, my chest.

That idiot Featherhead. Look what he did.

- What is it?

- It's the map, I've got to get it off.

I'll tell them it was a mirage.

- What are you trying to do?

- I'm gonna make a clean breast of it.

- Who's that at the door?

- It ain't opportunity. I'm getting out of here.

Wait a minute, Hooky, old boy,

I can explain everything, wait.

There, Mr. Hook. That squares our account.

I have your map and your life.

Now we must get out of here.

- Stop reading my mind.

- Quite ajob I did.

I'm an artist

and so are you, Sylvester the Great...

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Don Hartman

Samuel Donald Hartman (18 November 1900, New York - 23 March 1958, Palm Springs, California) was an American screenwriter and director. He and Stephen Morehouse Avery were nominated for the Academy Award for Best Story for The Gay Deception (1935). more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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