The Princess Bride Page #15

Westley picks her up, carrying her across some swamp water

that is bridged by a narrow, rickety tree branch.

WESTLEY:

Well, Roberts had grown so rich,

he wanted to retire. So he took

me to his cabin and told me his

secret. "I am not the Dread

Pirate Roberts," he said. "My

name is Ryan. I inherited this

ship from the previous Dread

Pirate Roberts, just as you will

inherit it from me. The man I

inherited it from was not the

real Dread Pirate Roberts, either.

(MORE)

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60.

WESTLEY (CONT'D)

His name was Cummerbund. The real

Roberts has been retired fifteen

years and living like a king in

Patagonia." Then he explained the

name was the important thing for

inspiring the necessary fear. You

see, no one would surrender to

the Dread Pirate Westley.

The two of them have by now crossed the pond.

WESTLEY:

So we sailed ashore, took on an

entirely new crew and he stayed

aboard for awhile as first mate,

all the time calling me Roberts.

Once the crew believed, he left

the ship and I have been Roberts

ever since. Except, now that

we're together, I shall retire

and hand the name over to someone

else. Is everything clear to you?

Buttercup, perplexed, is about to reply but the ground she

steps on gives way -- it's Lightning Sand -- a great patch

of it, and it has her -- a cloud of powder rises and she

sinks into the stuff crying Westley's name but then she is

gone as we --

CUT TO:

WESTLEY WHIRLING

slashing at a U-shaped vine, hacks it in half -- it's still

connected to the tree. Then be grabs it, drops his sword,

and, clutching the other end of the vine, he dives into the

lightning sand and there is another cloud of white powder,

but it settles quickly.

Now nothing can be seen. Nothing at all. Just the lightning

sand, lovely and lethal.

HOLD ON THE LIGHTNING SAND -- THEN --

An odd panting sound is heard now. The panting sound is

suddenly very loud. And then a giant R.0.U.S. darts into

view. The R.0.U.S. -- a Rodent of Unusual Size -- is probably

no more than eighty pounds of bone and power. It sniffs

around a bit then, as quickly as it has come, it goes.

CUT TO:

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61.

THE LIGHTNING SAND

as Westley, lungs long past the bursting point, explodes

out; he has Buttercup across his shoulders and as he pulls

to the edge of the lightning sand pit, using the vine --

CUT TO:

CLOSE-UP - BUTTERCUP

Her face is caked with the white powder. It is in her eyes,

her ears, hair, mouth. She's still probably beautiful, but

you have to look awfully hard to see it. As Westley continues

to pull them to safety --

CUT TO:

THE R.0.U.S.

high above them; it watches --

CUT TO:

BUTTERCUP:

placed against a tree. Westley is cleaning the lightning

sand from her face. He hesitates, glances around and

CUT TO:

THE R.0.U.S.

on a much lower branch now. It stares down at Westley.

Westley stares back up at the beast. Buttercup is oblivious.

Her eyes flutter. He continues to work on her as --

BUTTERCUP:

We'll never succeed -- we may as

well die here.

WESTLEY:

No. No. We have already succeeded.

He glances back again. Now THERE ARE TWO R.0.U.S.'s. The

have climbed into a nearby tree, stare hungrily down.

CUT TO:

WESTLEY, picking her up.

He puts an arm around her, starts to walk with her as he

encouragingly goes on talking.

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62.

WESTLEY:

I mean, what are the three

terrors of the Fire Swamp? One,

the flame spurts. No problem.

There's a popping sound preceding

each, we can avoid that. Two, the

Lightning Sand. But you were

clever enough to discover what

that looks like, so in the future

we can avoid that too.

BUTTERCUP:

Westley, what about the R.O.U.S.'s?

WESTLEY:

Rodents of Unusual Size? I don't

think they exist...

And as he says that, a R.0.U.S. comes flying at him from

offscreen.

CUT TO:

BUTTERCUP:

screaming and --

Westley, pinned under the attacking R.0.U.S., trying to fend

it off. Can't. The thing's teeth sink deep into his arm. He

howls.

Westley drives a fist into the beast's face, rolling it off.

He reaches for his sword just a few feet away, but the

R.0.U.S. is back atop him. It's a fierce battle, and just

when we think Westley can't possibly win, he flips the ugly

rodent clear.

Westley scrambles for his sword. The R.0.U.S. stampedes on,

changing its target, heading right for --

Buttercup, and she's scared to death and --

BUTTERCUP:

Westley!

Westley abandons his sword, reaching for the rodent, grabbing

only a tail, wrestling with it. Buttercup grabs a small

branch, and using it as a club, beats the skull of the

thing, doing pretty well, but the beast manages to snag her

hem with its razor teeth, and she's pulled to the ground, and

CUT TO:

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63.

WESTLEY:

jumping onto its back, and the R.0.U.S. is all over him now,

sinking needle teeth into Westley's shoulder.

CUT TO:

WESTLEY:

with death close at hand, as a popping sound starts. He

tries one desperate move, rolls into the sound --

CUT TO:

A FLAME SPURT:

shooting skyward and --

CUT TO:

WESTLEY:

with the R.0.U.S. pinned under him, and as the beast bursts

into flame, it lets go and Westley rolls safely free, grabs

his sword and exhaustedly stabs the R.0.U.S., which is

trying to put itself out.

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