The Private Life of Henry VIII.

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[Bells Pealing]

- So that's the king's bed!

- Yes.

And he's not long left it.

Feel!

- [Women Giggling]

- Ooh!

- I wonder what he looks like in bed.

- You'll never know.

Well, you needn't be spiteful about it.

Need she, Mistress Nurse?

No, my dear. And you've as good

a chance as anyone else...

if the king's in one

of his merry moods.

Oh, I never meant...

I never thought...

- Didn't you, darling?

- [Laughing]

Now, ladies, you're not here to quarrel

but to get busy with your needles.

Now all these A's have got to come out

and J's go in.

On.

That's it.

- There you are. Hurry, hurry, ladies.

- [Chattering]

Anne Boleyn dies this morning.

Jane Seymour

takes her place tonight.

What luck.

For which of them?

I wonder.

[Crowd Chattering]

[Chattering Continues]

- Here I am, darlings!

- Come along. Sit down.

Oh, thank you!

Oh, poor Anne Boleyn.

- I do feel so sorry for her.

- [Hammering]

Excuse me, madam.

Do you mind taking off your hat?

We can't see the block.

Thank you so much.

[Hammering Continues]

[Whistling]

[Whistling Continues]

[Chattering]

[Laughing]

Anne Boleyn.

Was she guilty, do you think?

- All her lovers confessed.

- Under torture.

She was as innocent as you or I.

Thanks for the compliment.

She dies so that the king

may be free to marry Jane Seymour.

Yes. That's what they mean

when they say, "Chop and change."

Oh, don't, girls.

It's no jesting matter.

[Crowd Chattering]

The other mirror, please,

Lady Marbury.

Will the net hold

my hair together when...

when my head falls?

[Lady Marbury Sobbing]

Yes, madam.

Isn't it a pity

to lose a head like this?

Still, they will easily

find a nickname for me.

Among the queens of England

I shall be "Anne sans tete. "

That means

"Anne who lost her head."

Ah.

There is a blade for you.

Fit for a king.

Or in this case, a queen.

N'est-ce pas?

- Not fit for our queen.

- No? Why not?

She's an English queen, ain't she?

Well, what's wrong

with English steel?

And come to that, what's wrong

with an English headsman?

Ah. Meaning yourself?

Why not?

I was good enough to knock off

the queen's five lovers, wasn't I?

Why'd they want you?

A Frenchman from Calais!

[Spits]

- I will tell you!

- Nol

I'm telling you.

It's a crying shame...

with half the English executioners

out of work as it is.

And why are they out of work?

Because they are only fit to sever

the bull necks of their countrymen...

with a butcher's cleaver.

But a woman's neck,

a queen's neck...

That calls for finesse,

for delicacy...

for chivalry.

In one word, a Frenchman.

I could think of another word.

Jane Seymour, of all people.

Whatever could the king see in her?

Oh, she's very sweet.

Yes, but does the king like honey

with his milk and water?

- [Laughing]

- Listen!

- Wasn't that the gun?

- What gun?

Will there be a gun fired?

When Anne Boleyn's head falls,

a gun is to be fired from the tower...

another from Westminster,

and a third from Richmond...

so that the king may know

the moment he's free to marry Jane.

What a pretty arrangement. The joint

goes out, and bang... the sweets come in.

- Oh, Katherine!

- Oh, well, if the king were not a king,

what would you call him?

- What would you call him?

- I'll tell you.

No. Tell me.

If I were not a king, what then?

All right, ladies.

Come here!

Look at me.

What would you call me?

I should call you,

Your Majesty...

a man.

Ha! So I am and glad of it.

[Laughing]

And you may be glad of it, too,

one day.

Blushing?

She must be new to the court.

- What's your name, wench?

- Katherine Howard.

If it please Your Majesty.

It does, Katherine!

It does.

[Crowd Chattering]

- What's that noise?

- The crowd, madam.

Just like my wedding day.

[Rhythmic Tapping]

Cromwell, if England were as rich as Portugal

or as big as Spain, you might be right.

But this little island of three million souls

is no match for all Europe.

- All Europe?

- Yes!

If those French and Germans

stop cutting each other's throats,

what's to stop them cutting ours?

A wise diplomacy, sire.

Diplomacy!

Diplomacy, me foot!

I'm an Englishman.

I can't say one thing and mean another.

What I can do is to build ships,

ships and then more ships.

- You mean, double the fleet?

- Triple it!

Fortify Dover.

Rule the sea.

To do this will cost us money, sire.

To leave it undone

will cost us England.

- [Murmuring]

- [Bell OPealing]

Thomas Culpeper!

Will you see

what's become of the queen?

A gun will be fired

from the tower, Your Majesty.

Yes! I did not mean...

Will you see

if the Lady Jane is ready?

- And now the headdress, madam.

- Oh, yes.

Now, which one shall I wear?

The velvet coif or the pearl chaplet?

- Oh, the chaplet. Wear the chaplet.

- [All Chattering]

[Knocking]

The king wishes to know

whether you are ready, madam.

Oh, but I don't know

whether to wear the pearls or the...

Oh, of course.

I'll ask the king.

[Henry] With a strong port in Dover

and a strong fleet in the channel...

we can laugh in their faces.

But it's the moneyl The moneyl

We must have the...

Henry!

Softly, sweetheart.

We have affairs of state here.

Oh, but, darling...

this is really important.

Henry. Henry, which one

shall I wear?

My Lord Archbishop,

will you await us in the chapel?

Henry.

You haven't said a word

about my wedding dress.

Don't you love it?

Twenty-one little buttons.

One for every year of my life.

[Laughing]

[Jane Laughing]

- Don't you love the back?

- The back? Marvelous!

[Jane Laughing]

Do be serious. Which of these?

Pearls for a pearl. Now run along,

my sweet, and put them on.

The bishop waits.

Thomas, me hat!

[Footsteps Approaching]

Is it... time?

I was told that the executioner

was very good.

He is very good.

It does not hurt, madam.

It's all over in a second.

And I have such a little neck.

Haven't I?

Well, Thomas.

What do you think of the new queen?

- Wonderful, Your Majesty.

- Beautiful?

- Lovely.

- Clever too?

A miracle of good sense,

Your Majesty.

Liar.

[Laughing]

No, Thomas.

Not clever, thanks be to heaven.

My first wife was clever.

My second was ambitious. My third...

Thomas, if you want to be happy,

marry a girl like my sweet little Jane.

Marry a stupid woman.

[Women Crying]

[Drumroll Continues]

[Drumroll Stops]

What a lovely day.

What a lovely day.

[Single Loud Drumbeat]

Well, one must admit,

she died like a queen.

Yes. And that frock.

Wasn't it too divine?

- Was it? I didn't notice.

- No, you wouldn't.

You wouldn't notice that I haven't

had a new gown for a year.

All right. All right.

You shall have one... for your execution.

What...

[Staff Taps On Ground]

[Culpeper] Knights, ladies,

gentlemen and gentlewomen.

Attend the king, his Royal Highness

by the grace of God...

Henry Vlll, King of England and France,

Lord of Ireland.

Jane.

[Choir]

Ave Maria

[Singing In Latin]

- Warming pans.

- Warming pans.

Warming pans.

Rosewater.

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