The Rake Page #3

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When I say that I need

to decompress, thank me

in advance for sparing

your life.

Oh, okay. Yeah, sure try

your little power play,

see what happens. Huh? Let me

tell you something, Graham.

I've got two Masters,

a loaded 9mil,

and perfect 34B's, any of which

that could turn you

and your prick inside out.

So, let's just say it together,

huh? Competence!

Jesus Christ.

Did you just threaten

to smoke your partner?

No, just a memo between friends.

- I'm glad we're not friends.

- Oh, no, I like you,

just Graham,

on the other hand...

- Maybe, it's time to leave.

- Leave?

No, leaving solves nothing,

honey, tenacity wins.

We don't need tenacity

right now, we need a break.

A break? Okay, you know,

I don't think he's going to be

calling anytime soon.

- I think, he got the point.

- Good.

Because it'd just be really nice

if you weren't glued

to your phone all weekend.

Monday through Friday

is bad enough.

Yikes!

- [ZIPPER ZIPS]

- Take a chill pill.

You know, I didn't mean it

like that.

It's fine. Just drop it.

You know what, no.

Just because Ashley

is struggling with some sh*t,

doesn't mean you have to too.

- [SIGHS] Yeah, you're right.

- Damn straight, I'm right.

It took a little bit of time

but you turned out okay.

I'm proud of you.

- Thanks.

- Yeah.

Can you just turn off

this emo attitude?

You're a lot stronger

than you realize.

You know, just help her through

this sh*t

and show her how it's done.

Hey.

- This look okay?

- Yeah, you look great, hun.

You're not her guardian angel,

you know.

She's a grown woman now,

she should be able to take care

of herself.

But she can't take care

of herself.

- Why can't you accept that?

- I did...

years ago.

They should've never released

her from the hospital.

She obviously needs a lot

of supervision and help.

How can you be so cold to her?

Honestly, what has she

ever done to you, really?

Nothing, it's just

that she's bringing you down

and it's pissing me off.

Well, you have

a really shitty way

of showing your concern

for my well-being.

I just... I don't know why

you didn't let her go

when she wanted to leave.

Because she's my sister.

- She's not your sister.

- BEN:
Hello?

- Where is everyone?

- MICHELLE:
Hello?

- Andrew?

- ANDREW:
Hey.

- You look good, Ash.

- [SCOFFS] Whatever.

You look happy.

I'm trying. One day at a time,

you know?

[JEREMY MIMICKING HOWL]

Andy, get your ass out here!

Ah, there he is!

- [GRUNTS] Here I come.

- ANDREW:
All right!

[GRUNTS] Here I come. Howl

with me!

Brother, I will make you howl.

[MIMICKING HOWL]

Jesus, it's been years, man!

How the hell have you been?

I'm good. I've been good.

Hey, I thought you said,

you were going to bring someone.

Oh, yeah, yeah, Kim. She'll be

around, her shift ends at eight.

Ah, come on! Who cares?

Great, great. Come inside, man.

I got food on the way. It's...

Food? Jeremy need drink.

A drink! A pint!

A pint for brother Jeremy!

A pint for brother Andrew!

I don't know who this man

is anymore.

Andrew, the guy who once drank

an entire bottle of tequila

and tried to fight

a rugby team...

now wears Mr. Rogers sweaters

and drinks grape juice. Huh!

I'm sorry that my taste is

too sophisticated for even you.

Tell me, did Nicole pluck

your berries...

or did they just shrivel up

and fall off the vine?

Okay, you know, my berries

are just fine, okay?

JEREMY:
[LAUGHS] Yeah,

says the guy

who built his f***ing wine rack

before his love shack.

Oh, you know what, f*** off!

- You uncivilized savage.

- JEREMY:
Oh!

I knew California would make

you soft.

Of course it would. All it is

a bunch

of f***ing famous people

and kale.

And the ocean, and fresh fruit,

the sun.

And you traded all that

for the winters of Siberia?

Family is worth freezing for.

Sure is.

This one's nice.

NICOLE:
Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

This was taken the day that Dad

brought you and Ben home.

Do you remember that?

Just like yesterday.

Welcome back, Nicole and Andrew.

Bring on the bubbly!

Please. Thank you.

Oh, uh...

I shouldn't.

Come on, Mama-Sis,

one's not going to kill you.

No f***ing way!

Wait, I don't get it.

- I'm pregnant.

- Yes! Oh, my God!

BEN:
Oh!

JEREMY:
Looks like the berries

are hanging just fine

- after all, huh?

- Congratulations.

- Hey, now it's a celebration.

- Congrats to you two.

- [LAUGHTER]

- [INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[HIGH-PITCHED RINGING]

[INAUDIBLE]

[DISTANT VOICE] Ashley?

Aren't you excited?

- Ashley?

- [RINGING CONTINUES]

What?

You're going to be an aunt,

aren't you excited?

Yeah, sure.

You just...

- can't be happy for her?

- Just let it go, okay?

- Andy...

- No! I'm interested.

I'm interested.

Is there any particular reason

why you deem it

necessary to, yet again,

suck the f***ing happiness

out of the f***ing room?

I guess we opened that bottle

of champagne a little too early.

- BEN:
Hey, Andrew, relax, man.

- No, no, she's done nothing

but scare my wife, my wife,

ever since she got here.

You know what, Andrew,

I am perfectly capable

of speaking for myself,

and that being said,

you're acting like an a**hole.

I guess, I don't know what

the f*** I'm talking about then,

huh?

ASHLEY:
She came out in pieces.

What?

Eighteen months ago...

I was so weak that my doctors

urged me to terminate her.

They said she'd most likely come

all f***ed up...

with holes in her brain

or something worse.

I was in a constant state

of insomnia and paranoia so...

I trusted them.

I can still feel the cold steel

as they pried me open...

And smell the stench that filled

the room as...

they blended her up inside me...

and vacuumed her out...

like trash.

Still want me to plan

the baby shower?

You're f***ing pathetic.

NICOLE:
Why would she say

something like that?

Do you think that's the truth?

Do you think it was too much

too soon?

- She's not used to crowds.

- Or frat boys.

I know.

This whole night. God, I wish

I could drink.

Un momento.

I think, I saw something in...

Uh, aha! Baby safe.

You guys, this is still

a celebration, right?

Babe, babe, you're going to be

an uncle. Yup.

The three of us can still

salvage the night, right?

Can you please take a moment

and celebrate with your sister?

You two start without me.

I just need to clear my head

for a bit.

All right, you're not leaving

until you have this toast

with us.

So, beautiful. Thought

of any names yet?

You know, it's...

it's still early.

We don't want to get ahead

of ourselves.

Okay. B*tch, you're glowing,

all right? Just relax.

MICHELLE:
You're going

to be fine.

- Come on, what do you've got?

- Okay, um...

if it's a boy, Andrew wants

to name him Oliver,

after his father,

and if it's a girl...

- I've chosen Savannah.

- Savannah?

Oh, my God, that's so hot.

Guaranteed to be a pretty one.

- To family!

- BEN AND NICOLE: To family.

I'm sorry. I need

to get some air.

Oh.

Congratulations.

Ben...

she'll be okay, right?

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