The Sniper Page #2

---

I only want to hear this song.

But maybe somebody else

wants to hear something else.

Maybe I want to hear something else.

Listen, I've been paying for this.

I bought nine drinks here tonight.

Maybe nine drinks are too many for you.

Maybe you better go home.

Hey, you can't do that to me.

I just did it. Now, are you going to leave

quiet or do you need a little help?

All right. But you'll be sorry.

Nobody's making a fool out of me.

- Nice fellow.

- You ought to be used to it by now.

I never get used to it. Jeannie. Play me

something. Play me Plaisir d'amour.

So you can go off in a corner and cry?

With that song and the way business is,

I cry right out in public.

Are you sure you don't want me

to get you a cab?

Walking's the only exercise I get these days.

But I don't like you out alone

like this at night.

What makes you think I'm alone?

After all, I'm leaving early.

How do you know I don't have someone

waiting for me around the corner?

- I wish it was me. Good night, Jeannie.

- Good night, Pete.

I almost seen it.

I just finished looking out the window,

and I went back into the kitchen

to take a pill, and I heard this backfire,

and I waited a minute

and I thought to myself

it's a funny kind of a backfire.

I never heard a backfire like that before.

So I went back to the window

and looked and she was laying there,

- and this fellow was bending over her.

- What fellow?

Pete, there. The fellow that owns the bar.

He come running out, I guess.

Look. They're going to take another picture.

- Okay.

- Where's Lieutenant Kafka?

- Inside, him and Ferris both.

- Ask him if he's all through out here.

- We'd like to take off.

- Okay.

They want to know

if they can remove the body, Lieutenant.

Did you get your pictures?

- Yes, sir.

- All right.

How about one with

the sheet off, Lieutenant?

- Just one, that's all.

- Not a chance.

Why not? What's the matter?

Listen, food's too expensive to spoil

people's appetite for breakfast.

I wouldn't want a dead girl on my front page.

You've got one anyway.

I don't like dead girls on the front page

or anywhere else.

Should have been with me last night.

You wouldn't have liked

a couple of live ones.

I had a lot of trouble last night.

You're gonna have a lot of trouble tonight,

too. Get over there to that building.

Start from the roof and check

every apartment that fronts on the street.

I'll be inside seeing what they got to say.

- Right.

- Okay. Break it up. Show's over.

Yes, sir. All right, let's go, boys. Break it up.

All right. Go home. Go home!

Well, you see,

I live across the street over there.

Go across the street.

That little girl shouldn't be out

this time of night.

- I'm her mother.

- Well, that makes her a lucky kid.

Come on, home, please. Go home. Go home!

- I still say we were cheated in that game.

- It's just a game.

- I don't care how it came out.

- Fill her up.

Well, I care how it came out.

I had some money bet on the game.

Hey, Mac, you seen that play

on the television tonight, didn't you?

Twenty-five.

The one at second

that all that rhubarb was about?

You know, in the fourth

where they thumbed Parsons out.

- It's what he deserved.

- Are you smiling at me?

- No, I'm smiling at everybody.

- Business good today?

- I'm not a businessman.

- This is what businessmen carry around.

- I'm an engineer.

- On the railroads?

No. I build things.

You know, bridges and things.

I just got back from Hawaii today.

I was building a bridge in Hawaii.

That's why I'm smiling at everybody.

I'm glad to be home.

It sure is great to be stateside again.

What do you want? A drink?

No, no. I got one back there. That how

you hurt your hand, building the bridge?

Oh, that. No, that was on the boat coming

back. They were shooting skeet on the boat.

Gun went off by mistake,

and I got a few slugs in my hand.

Poor kid. You know, I like you.

You got a nice face. Poor kid.

- What was the name of the bridge?

- The Burnside Bridge.

- What was the name of the river?

- It wasn't on a river.

It was between two islands. Five miles long.

Nobody ever built a bridge that long.

That's crazy.

- What was the name of the islands?

- Hawaii and Burnside Island.

I never heard of a Burnside Island.

All those islands got Hawaiian names,

like Cocowakahiki and stuff like that.

Are you kidding me?

- I said what I said.

- I think you're kidding me.

I think you're pulling my leg. Probably got

that hand caught in a wringer or something.

- Hey, where are you going?

- Back where they don't pull my leg.

I should have stayed where I was.

Coming. Coming.

Hello. Who wants him?

Just a minute.

Mr. Miller!

Mr. Miller?

Mr. Miller? Mr. Miller?

Mr. Miller, are you in there?

What is it?

You're still there. It's the cleaners.

It's late and they want to know if you're sick.

- Are you sick?

- No, no. I'm all right.

I guess I must have overslept.

Tell them I'll be there as quick as I can.

Ain't like you, Mr. Miller.

- When did you start keeping bankers hours?

- I overslept.

Listen, Miller, the only one who can

oversleep here is Mr. Alpine.

I don't care which way you cut it,

you're still an errand boy.

- Don't ever forget that.

- It won't happen again.

That's right.

Hey, Eddie. Good thing you came in late.

I got jammed up.

- Here's that special you ordered.

- Swell.

Yeah. Yeah. Wait a minute.

I'll write that down. Got it. Thanks.

- Where you been?

- Barber's.

- Yeah, you look neat.

- You don't.

- No, I guess I need a shave.

- What difference does it make?

- You're married.

- My wife is visiting her mother.

- Shave.

- Ballistics just called.

That casing you found on the roof,

it's from an M1 carbine.

The cartridge is called a.30 caliber M1.

- That's the only gun it will fit.

- Gives it an Army slant, huh?

Listen, every GI who can

pinches one of these when he gets out.

There must be 10,000 of them

kicking around.

There are also a couple million men

in the Army.

Well, there's one civilian you can scratch,

the guy she had the beef with in the bar.

They found him

in the drunk tank this morning.

He was loaded, went on to another joint,

passed out. He's in the clear.

No word from the boyfriend yet.

He'll probably turn up

as soon as he reads the papers.

From what I know about musicians,

they're not that neat

when they decide to get rid of their dames.

Look, there's a pile of letters over there

by the phone. Run through them, will you?

- What's all the excitement?

- A girl evidently got killed last night.

That's why all the cops.

A fellow killed her right in the street.

- What fellow?

- They haven't caught him yet.

- It was a fellow, all right.

- Well, you wait.

- It will turn out to be her boyfriend.

- Mark my words, it always does.

Yes, it's getting so nowadays

you can't trust these men.

- Yeah.

- It's getting so you can't trust women, either.

Andy Solmes.

Does that name mean anything to you?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes