The Sweeter Side of Life Page #5

Cat, Desiree.

Hi. You're very pretty.

Great jeans.

I gotta go.

Oh.

That was so stupid!

Well, I cannot believe...

What are you doing?

Just shut up and pretend

we're together.

- Okay.

- She struck out with Benny.

- Don't point.

- Who's the hottie?

I'm such an idiot.

- He has a girlfriend.

- No, no, no. You got it all wrong.

Cat's not with Benny.

She's with Johnny.

Ow! Hey, I'm sorry, Mr. P.

Excuse me.

Excuse me. Sorry.

Hey! What's

she doin'?

Patience.

We regulars have seniority.

- Okay, that's fine, but...

- Isn't that right, Desiree?

- Just a few minutes...

- Get to the back of the line!

Thank you.

It's on the house.

- Thank you, Desiree.

- You're welcome.

Thank you, Stella.

Thank you, sweetie.

Chocolate.

We need more paddycakes.

They're animals out there.

Hey, that's the way I like it.

When does Calvin get back?

Who knows?

Eddie!

Oh, thank goodness.

- We need your help.

- How long has business been like this?

Since today.

Eddie, don't just stand there.

Do something.

Like what?

Wash the pans.

I don't do dishes!

I make $600 an hour soaking

rich people in Manhattan!

Let me clear off these.

I'll be right back.

Well, hello, ladies.

I'm not really a waiter.

I'm actually rich and powerful.

I live on Central Park West.

See that Benz there?

It's mine.

Right.

No? Okay.

Looks good, looks good.

There you go, June.

Thank you.

Everybody, I'm sorry.

We're sold out.

No!

Okay, tomorrow, tomorrow.

Please come back.

Thank you, Joyce.

I'll have a dozen

for you, okay?

Ah!

Whew!

Ah, we're closed.

- Thank the Lord!

- Man, that was crazy.

You know, this has been

the biggest day

in the history of this bakery.

Hi! Have you seen this?

What's that?

What's this?

"Life Just Got Sweeter On

The Other Side Of The River. "

They're calling Paddy's Bakery

"a little slice of nirvana. "

Ooh, that's nice.

It talks about

you, too, Desiree.

They love your paddycakes!

Oh!

- How did they find us?

- Yeah.

It's the Gaultier girl!

We're famous!

Thanks for coming out.

You're welcome, kiddo.

Would you mind dropping

these off to Andrei, my old doorman?

Sure.

Don't worry. I'm gonna have you

living back in the city in no time.

Okay.

Mwah! I got ideas.

All right.

- See you soon.

- Drive safe.

I will.

Desiree, Benny called earlier.

He did?

He asked us out.

He asked who out?

All of us.

Watch your step.

You know, sometimes the

cement will attack you!

Hello, hello!

Welcome to my humble abode!

Ah, lovely to see you.

Thank you, Francine.

Thank you.

Please. That's great.

- I'll put this in the kitchen.

- Thanks, Paddy.

That's very kind of you.

Thank you very much.

- Make yourselves at home now.

- Benny, how ya doin'?

- Dino, good to see you.

- Good to see you.

- Thanks for coming.

- I'll put this in the fridge.

Thank you, thank you.

You know where you're going.

You shouldn't have.

I should have.

I'll put it

somewhere safe. Come on.

- You look beautiful.

- Thank you.

I didn't have your number,

so I called your dad.

This is my uncle's wine

from Sicily.

- Oh!

- It's wonderful.

- I have to try that.

- Merci bien, Elena.

- Smells so good.

- Thank you, thank you.

I hope you enjoy it.

Um, to your very good health.

It's really lovely

to have you all here.

It means a lot to me.

Cheers.

Thank you. Cheers.

So much. Salute.

Cheers.

It's my pleasure.

- Mm, fantastic.

- Oh.

Benny,

this is probably the best chicken

I've ever eaten in my whole life.

Well, thank you, Paddy,

but it's not chicken.

It's not?

It's frog's legs, Paddy.

What the heck, ya know?

As long as it doesn't hop off the plate.

No, no, I disagree.

Opera should only be

sung in Italian.

It's the most romantic

language in the world, huh?

Yeah, but the French,

they sing the best love songs.

Well, yeah, I think

you're both crazy.

'Cause the best thing

in the world is a good Irish jig.

An Irish jig?

I know how to settle this.

Way, hey, and away, yah

We'll pay Paddy Doyle

for his boots

We'll bunt up the sail

with a fling, yah

And pay Paddy Doyle

for his boots

Thank you for this.

My father hasn't been

on a date in seven years.

It's my pleasure.

Would you like a quick tour?

- I'd love one.

- Come on.

Way, hey, and away, yah

We'll pay Paddy Doyle

for his boots

Ah, yes, so the guests

all stay up there,

and, um, this is where I live.

That's an elevator in there,

but it doesn't work.

Nice.

And in there is the library.

Lots of books.

Books.

I love books.

You love books?

I love books.

Oh, that's my office in there,

but it's a little disorganized.

You don't want to look in that.

Okay.

How is it that you don't

have a significant other?

- Oh, I did have. She was French.

- Oh.

She hated New Jersey. In the end,

she didn't care for me much either.

Ah, French girls are tough.

Brutal.

- Oh, wow.

- Yeah.

Oh, that's my great uncle.

Just ignore him.

Okay.

Perhaps we should

continue the tour.

Yes.

- Uh, we have a problem.

- What is it?

We've run out of hallway.

And they've stopped singing.

Benny, come on down here!

It's your turn now!

Yeah! Come on!

- Rain check?

- Absolutely.

- We need more coconut cream.

- Already?

Oh, wow!

That's a good thing.

Any calls?

Nope.

It's only been two days.

It's too soon

for Benny to call.

Yeah, that would violate

the three-day rule.

Yeah, man. Women like it

when you make them wait.

I got a news flash for you men.

The three-day rule is stupid.

Women don't like it.

It just makes us angry.

I don't care what happens.

Do not call Benny.

I'm not.

- Just relax.

- Yeah, man, chill.

I am the queen of chill!

I could care less

if Benny calls or not.

Paddy's.

I mean, Desiree here.

I'm a genius.

It's Eddie.

Hi. Look,

we're very busy here.

What is it?

I would love

to buy you a hot dog.

What?

No, not you, Desiree.

How 'bout a pretzel?

Eddie, focus.

- No...

- Yo, what are you doin'?

Come on! You're

scaring off my customers!

Give me one of those.

- Look, I'm hanging up, Eddie.

- Desiree, wait!

Keep the change.

I got you

a Willy Wonka of a deal,

and you're gonna love it!

Zwieback International

wants to franchise

Paddy's Bakery.

Are you serious?

Yeah! They're going crazy over

the whole paddycakes thing.

We can talk about

my commission later.

We gotta move fast,

while I got 'em salivating.

Hang on. Daddy...

Zwieback wants to

franchise the bakery.

They want to meet

with us Friday.

Great. Get me

the flour, sweetheart.

Did you hear me?

Yeah, I heard you.

Look, I'm not going

to the big city. You go.

Okay.

We're on.

Great. Oh, and, Desiree,

they're gonna pick you up.

Hey, Daddy, are you sure

you're okay with me negotiating for you?

Well, of course.

It's just...

It's your bakery, and this is a huge deal.

Sweetheart, it's not my bakery.

It's our bakery.

Thank you for saying that.

I just hope I don't mess it up.

You won't.

How do you know?

Because you're a Kerrigan.

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