The Thin Man Goes Home Page #2

Oh, he must be simply huge by now.

Hello, Asta. Oh, I'm so excited.

Come along, I'll get you two settled.

You know something...

...I believe the plan is going through.

- For the hospital?

- Yes. Isn't it wonderful?

Nora, they're going to build

a hospital for the doctor...

...with a laboratory for research work.

Something he's dreamed of all his life.

Why, good heavens, Hilda.

What are you doing there?

Take the bags upstairs.

- Are you all right?

- Why, of course I'm all right.

This is my son, the famous detective.

What is the matter with you, Hilda?

Detective?

- This is all your fault.

- Mine?

It behaves like this when

there's excitement in the house.

You mean that this table

hasn't been fixed yet?

If you wanna make yourself useful,

fix it.

- There's a screwdriver in the kitchen.

- I don't need one.

I've got a gadget in my pocket

that'll do anything...

...from manicuring to safe-cracking.

- Safe-cracking. Nicky.

Now, how did this get in here?

Come along, help me with the tea.

And take off your pretty hat.

Just a little elbow grease.

There we are.

Now...

That's the last time

that'll ever come down.

- Well, doctor.

- Oh, Nora, dear.

Sorry I missed you at the station.

That's all right.

I managed to get him here.

Yes, so I see.

- Hiya, Pop.

- Hello, son. Well...

...let's get him on his feet.

- Come on. Up you come.

- You know, I was just fixing this table.

Yes, I know. And I suppose

that's furniture polish?

- That, Dad, is cider. Taste it.

- I don't have to. I believe you.

- One swallow.

- Lf you say it's cider, it's cider.

- Please, Dr. Charles.

- Oh, well.

Why, Nick. This is cider.

What a dinner. What a dinner.

Ma, I'm glad to see that you still have

that same old magic touch with the skillet.

- It was delicious, Mother.

- Just sort of thrown together.

Sure, just thrown together.

She's been over that stove for hours.

Oh, now don't pay any attention

to him, Nick.

Hilda, bring the coffee in here.

Dad, that certainly is fine news

about the hospital.

Yes. Sam Ronson's going to make

a recommendation...

...at the next meeting of the board.

And a recommendation from him

is as good as an order.

- Who's Sam Ronson?

- The town banker.

He has a hand in everything here.

I suppose he's what you'd call a typhoon.

Don't you mean "tycoon," Mother?

Typhoon is a sort of big wind.

Well, that's Sam Ronson.

Nick, tell us something

about your work in New York.

Yes, Nick, do.

Have you gone to work?

What are you doing?

Oh, same old thing.

So you're still a policeman.

Well, I'd hardly put it that way.

- No? How would you put it?

- I'd say that Nick was more of a genius.

My Nick?

You see, Nick doesn't actually work

with the police.

In fact, people call on him who think

he's better than the police.

He's paid very large fees because his

work is important. Extremely important.

My dear Nora, I didn't say

it wasn't important.

You implied that you

didn't think it was very important.

You gave the impression you thought that

Nick walked the streets swinging a club.

- Lf I gave that impression, I'm sorry.

- Oh, sure. A very handsome apology.

If Nick thinks it's important to be

a policeman...

...that's all that matters, I suppose.

- But you don't know what he does.

- Darling.

Why don't you pop out to the kitchen

and speed up the coffee?

Some cases Nick solved were

considered absolutely impossible.

Darling, let me show you the view

from the front porch.

- It's beautiful in the moonlight.

- The Wynant murder?

Or the Fingers O'Toole case?

The slaughterhouse mystery?

Or take Stinky Davis.

- Stinky Davis?

- Stinky Davis?

The Stinky Davis case illustrates

what I mean about Nick.

Yes, I'm sure it does, Nora.

Do you still take two lumps in your

Stinky...? I mean, in your coffee?

Just imagine:
Four murders, all

strangulation, no fingerprints, no clues.

- The police were baffled.

- Of course.

All they had were four bodies.

What did they do?

They dumped the whole thing

in Nick's lap.

I see.

Nobody suspected Stinky,

because he'd been a cripple...

...since nitro went off while he was

cracking a canister in Salt Lake.

Everybody thought it was Rainbow Benny.

But Nick knew...

...that Rainbow was an expert with

the shiv. Strangling was out of his line.

Smart Nick. They turned the heat

on Slasher Martin...

...who ran a dice joint in Chinatown.

Slasher had an alibi with Squinty Burke

and Studsy Green. That took care of him.

But all the time Nick was certain

that Stinky Davis was the killer.

Why? Because he had him

pegged right away...

...for a two-timing, double-crossing rat.

Would the police listen to Nick? No.

They told him it was a hophead theory.

Wild as loco buttons...

...because Stinky was a cripple

and couldn't navigate.

Nick got the brushoff

from the police.

They coldshouldered him out.

But did that stop him?

No, sir. He knew the case was hot...

...and he was set to cook

on the front burner.

He said, "Stinky, you're the two-timing,

double-crossing rat...

...who strangled Knobs McClure,

Greasy Joe...

...and Horse-faced Dan

and Denver Mike."

And then he turned his back on Stinky.

And the trick worked.

Stinky got up out of his wheelchair

and tried to strangle Nick...

...with a wire he'd hidden in his mouth.

But just in time, Nick turned around,

gave him the old one-two...

...and knocked Stinky colder

than an ice flounder.

Stinky wasn't a cripple at all. He was

just using it to cover up his crimes. Now...

...what do you think of that?

- Well, if Nick suspected...

...that Stinky wasn't a cripple, why

didn't he have him examined by a doctor?

The whole thing's so silly.

Dr. Charles...

...you are impossible.

Now, you see. You've upset her.

Spirited little thing, isn't she?

Well, you know how women are.

No, how are they?

Mother, come here.

Isn't he beautiful?

Mother, what's wrong between

Nick and his father?

- Hasn't Nick ever told you?

- No, he's seldom talked about it.

It seems silly, but the

doctor had his heart set...

...on Nick becoming a doctor

so they could work together.

That's how the whole idea

for the hospital started.

- But Nick had a mind of his own.

- And became a policeman.

Yes, that's about it.

I wish he could do something to

impress his father while he's here.

Is there any crime in Sycamore Springs?

Gracious, no. The only excitement we ever

had was a runaway horse last Christmas.

There's nothing Nick wants more

than a pat on the back from his father.

- Lf he got that, he'd pop a button.

- Did he admit that?

No. You know Nicky.

We were married three years

before he told me he loved me.

Well, if you're looking for crime

in Sycamore Springs...

...you'll have to commit it yourself.

- I wonder.

Nicky always says that there's a skeleton

in nearly every closet.

If you rattle it hard enough,

something always happens.

But would Nick like it if you went

around rattling people's skeletons?

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