The Throwaways Page #3

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Right. I mean,

how much tactical experience do you have?

I speak hacker. I can talk to them.

Right, well, that's why I'm getting wired,

so you can stay in the van with the girl

here and translate the geek-speak.

Ow!

Sorry.

I had to reposition it.

Listen, it's not as easy

as just feeding you the lingo, okay?

If I go in...

Look, look. I go in alone.

You stay here with the

rest of the dropouts.

What about me?

You know, I could help.

Um, there's no use

for your skill set on this mission,

- but you keep it warm and we'll find...

- Test, test, test.

Ow!

Do you wanna wait till I go outside?

I'm just testing the equipment.

It's great.

Here you go.

All right,

there's four a**holes in here with laptops.

What does he look like?

Oh. Shaved head,

black clothes, puke-white skin.

Screw you, Drew.

Hey, Dmitri, how's your Bulgarian?

Hmm.

Good enough for government work...

and playing around with...

prostitutes.

That's good. I don't know what you said.

Yeah.

I need you to reply to this post, okay.

This guy is a huge Levski football fan.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

So, why don't you say, "Ivo will be

lucky to score three goals this season."

"He's barely League One material."

Ivo is their best player.

He will score 20...

I'm sure he's really, really good.

- Best, best.

- Yeah.

Could you just write down

exactly what I just said?

.Okay-.Okay-

- My typing is for sh*t.

- Okay, that's all right.

Wow.

You're literally

killing me right now.

This isn't working.

You need to go faster than this.

All right, any day now.

All right, pissing him off,

pissing him off in three, two, one.

All right, I got him. I'm headed in.

Wait, wait, you can't just head in, okay.

I haven't briefed you.

These Bulgarian hackers

specialize in anti-virtualization.

Relax, I'll put this thing in the thing.

I don't know why you geeks

gotta complicate everything.

Three vodkas.

Stop him!

Take it easy.

Hey, Drew, they made me.

- I warned you.

- Okay, we'll leave now.

Sit down, you yellow commie bastard!

I'm going in.

Fisher, sit down.

Everyone, just calm down!

Jesus, you're children.

Hey, take it easy.

All right.

Ease off, guys.

Connelly, if you want to live,

repeat every word Dmitri says right now,

phonetically, okay?

All right.

Reading Bulgarian, okay,

but speaking, very different.

I don't recommend, huh?

Dmitri, listen to me.

You're all I've got, okay.

So, you need to translate

this for me right now, okay.

Take, here.

You passed the test!

On that SD card there are

120,000 credit card accounts.

I'll sell them to you for 5,000 euros.

I accept your offer of 5,000...

and I will sell you

back your life for 5,000.

- I'm going in.

- Fisher!

Fisher, where the hell are you going?

Are you gonna let

these anti-Semite pieces of sh*t win?

No way!

Not me!

Fisher, you don't need to go in there.

The chip worked.

I can get them to let him go.

Bazooka time.

Hey, everyone.

I have an announcement to make.

Shalom, motherfuckers.

We have to help them.

No, "0. no, no."

Dmitri! Not again.

- No!

- What are you doing?

Drew, get ready with the door.

Go, go, go!

Here.

Yeah?

Oh, slow down.

- Was it random?

- What do you mean?

Was it just a robbery,

or were you targeted?

I can't say, but they were American.

Was everything encrypted?

Yes. Of course.

That's good. You did everything right then.

Go back inside and don't worry.

Sh*t happens.

Thanks, man.

I got bit by a chubby, goulash-scented Nazi

because Fisher here

was born with an extra pair

of testicles instead of a brain.

- Wasn't goulash.

- What?

Goulash is Hungarian.

The Nazi that bit you

most likely smelled like chlopski posilek.

- You don't get to speak. You ran.

- What?

I was not running.

I was going to lead them away

and then move back around.

Fisher!

Holden is looking for you.

I thought I could hide up here.

What exactly are you hiding from?

You don't, uh...

You don't remember me, do you?

I had long hair and braces,

and I was 30 pounds heavier.

I had a beard.

Reston Skateway.

The year was 2000.

Uh, I was playing Mortal Kombat.

Mortal what?

You don't know what Mortal Kombat is?

No.

It's a video game.

Anyway, you were wearing

this tight red, um...

Uh, uh...

It was like a half-shirt.

And, uh, you asked me about hacking.

I told you everything.

I even made some stuff up to impress you.

I'm sorry, I don't remember you.

The Feds broke down my door a week later

and charged me with 30 felonies.

So, thank you.

Thank you for not

remembering ruining my life.

What do you want?

Some kind of tearful apology?

No, I just... I liked you.

And you said that you liked me.

- And I know that was a long time ago...

- Wait. Is that why you picked me?

You wanted some kind of revenge?

- Is that it?

- No, I didn't want revenge.

- No, no.

- Look, I don't remember you.

I was a virgin.

Yeah?

Well, we were all virgins once.

Oh, God, amen.

Hey, Drew, you wanna tell me

what the hell we're doing here?

The chip you put in

the laptop didn't tell us

the location of the Pantheon key.

But it did tell us who's selling it.

His name is Teebs, he's a black hat hacker

who sells chaos to the highest bidder.

So, we're here to take down this dweeb?

- Kick his ass silly?

- No, no.

Teebs is a ghost.

Nobody even knows his real name.

We're looking for his broker.

Broker?

Why does he need broker?

Well,

when you're selling something ephemeral,

like a zero-day, or an encryption key,

black-market buyers

want independent verification

that what they're buying is legit.

And the seller

wants to make sure that they get paid.

So, they hire a third party.

This broker verifies and vouches

for both parties and negotiates the terms.

And what makes you think he's here?

He's not.

Not yet. But he will be.

Every e-mail he sent Vitally

originated from the public Wi-Fi here.

This is like his office.

Yeah, well, he better hurry up,

because the next person

who asks for a half-caf, no whip,

I'm punching in the face.

No, Fisher. No punching.

No fighting, no kicking, no biting.

Do you understand that?

We're just gonna tail this guy.

You got that?

You and the geek stay

behind if it gets bad.

Geek squad, you read that?

Yeah, my phone

will ping me when he fogs on.

My God, he's an a**hole.

Yeah, well, most of them are.

So, you don't have a gun either?

No.

You know whatever's wrong with me

that makes me good at computers

makes me especially shitty

at spatial tasking.

What about you?

I don't really need one with my skill set.

That's bullshit. You know that, right?

That's nonsense.

You saved all of our lives.

Maybe they're too

proud to admit it, but I'm not.

Well, maybe on the next mission they can

reward me by letting me wear pants.

I'm freezing.

Well, I...

I was, uh, smart this morning.

And I have a layer.

There you go.

Oh, my God.

I remember you from the skating rink now.

You gave me your hoodie then, too.

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