The Videoblogs
- NOT RATED
- Year:
- 2016
- 82 min
- 6 Views
I haven't seen anyone
outside of work and
therapy, not for weeks.
I haven't talked to my parents.
We've texted here and there.
But that's it really.
I'm going to hate
text messaging.
When it comes to
conversations about real life,
what the f*** is a text anyway?
Except a way to get
what you want and need
without having to earn
the right to a response.
I don't know what's
going on with me.
I don't even know myself.
I don't know if I should care.
I haven't consistently, no.
[Man] Why not?
You don't have a reason?
[Woman] I'm sure
there must be one.
[Man] What's the first
thing that comes to mind?
That it's boring.
It's tiring.
It hurts my hand.
[Man] It hurts your hand?
When I write for a long time,
I don't hold my pen right.
I hold it like a fork.
And there's no other
way you can do it?
What do you mean?
Like type it all out,
save it to a folder?
[Man] Yeah, why not?
Whatever.
[Woman] It still
just seems boring.
It is boring.
I can't keep it up for
more than a few days
at a time.
So you're bored with efforts
to communicate with yourself?
Are other people
usually bored by you?
When you talk with them?
No, not usually.
about some more interesting ways
to keep this record of your
feelings from day to day.
(sighs)
(Apple startup tone)
It is important for me to
journal right now, I know that.
I accept it.
It is essential that
I learn to reflect.
So this is me, reflecting
In a way that's more
appropriate to the current age.
But is it better?
Writing by hand is
archaic, I know this
to be a true feeling,
I have vetted it.
I am doing this
not as a means of
finding an excuse not
to journal, but as
part of an experiment,
an adaptation.
Feels different.
I don't know if it's different
in necessarily a good way,
but I don't not know either.
Not sad tonight.
So that's a plus.
Except
because I'm not sad I don't know
what else I'm feeling either.
That doesn't mean I'm
happy, just because
I said I'm not sad.
Maybe this is an excuse to
Maybe I'm just indulging my own
personal form of television.
Maybe I'm just years late
to the YouTube impulse,
only I'm not even
doing it right,
because it's just me.
Not watching.
Maybe I'm on to something here.
Maybe this is the
next best thing
in media entertainment.
Soon, we'll all be staring
into our own cameras
talking to ourselves
alone in our homes.
It's like the worst
mirror in the world.
One that remembers.
I don't know, mirror,
nothing happened today.
internet all day,
did maybe an hour's
worth of work,
got praised for it.
(scoffs)
This little entry
is hardly worth
the cost of data storage.
You hear that, mirror?
You're a waste today.
You're worthless.
It's already getting
significantly colder out,
but I wanted to be out here.
I feel better out here.
The city seems quiet.
Almost peaceful
when you look at it
from just a few floors up.
It's neither, though, obviously.
It's weird
that we don't talk
about it anymore,
all the noise and the
conflict and the pain.
I guess we're used to it.
There's some joy too, I suppose.
But that might be harder to see.
Maybe I'm just not
looking closely enough.
(sighs)
I'm angry.
I'm angry that I can't
just go away somewhere
and fix all of my problems
I'm angry that a lot of
them aren't even my fault.
I know I'm underdeveloped
emotionally,
but what about the
world that chewed me up
and spit me out into
this moment, huh?
I mean, how f***ed up
is it that I resorted
to talking to
myself into a camera
in order to stay grounded
between therapy sessions?
How f***ed up is it
that I still think
this is good idea?
I know what this is.
This is the only way
for me to be able to
delineate between what is
real and what I am imagining.
So it's a crutch.
So what?
This is better than
doing it to a person.
An unconscious, unfeeling
machine is not capable
of being hurt by my bullshit,
and it doesn't judge.
Yeah.
A mirror that remembers
but does not judge.
Maybe there's some
value in that.
I don't know what's
going on with me.
I don't even know myself.
I don't know if I should care.
Cass keeps trying
to get in touch.
She's not giving up.
But what the f*** am
I supposed to say?
I'm sorry I've been
out of touch but I've
I don't know what to
make of what's left.
What's the difference anyway?
I have to go through this alone.
(crying)
It's not completely true.
I'm going to talk
to Cass, I'm going,
I'm going to end it.
I stopped communicating
with people.
I'm afraid of what
they'll think of me
as I actually am.
I wanted to record a quick entry
before I fell asleep.
Cass let me borrow
Zelda for the weekend.
I called her.
That's why I'm so tired.
We spent the whole
day out at the park
and we talked for hours.
I told her what's
been going on with me.
She's known that
I've been in therapy
and she's known for
longer than that
that I'm
that I've struggled.
That I'm a little damaged.
But she didn't know...
(sighs)
It's good that I reached out.
I'm never alone,
even if I feel
that way sometimes.
I know that on a
reasonable level,
but emotionally I forget.
(acoustic guitar music)
By the one thing you love
Pull with the threads
Say I'm not letting go
But what is the world
That we cling to it's old
Did we fall up or down?
Once we were sure
But not anymore
You know what to do
Oh it's coming around
Still you are invest
'Cause you want
what comes next
So you (mumbles)
Thanks y'all, my
name's Mike O'Malley,
I'll be your entertainment
for at least the next hour.
I promise it'll be
relatively painless.
(voices talking over each other)
[Voiceover] It's Friday.
[Voiceover] I want wine.
It's a wine kind
of night for me.
Okay, okay, I think wine
is for other weeknights.
What's the best
shot and beer combo
I can get for 10 bucks?
They're on the board.
I was halfway out the woods
A herd of goats and babies
And a fence made out of wood
And horticulture's
not my thing
But mercy me you
had a pretty garden
Hey.
Hi.
You're...
Margaret.
Writer, right?
Yeah.
Sometimes.
Yeah, Brett.
I remember.
Yep.
My wife is grabbing
a table in the back
if you wanna join.
It's gonna get pretty
slammed in here later.
I'm meeting a friend.
Gotcha.
Well, we're not on
a date or anything,
so we're meeting friends
too if you change your mind.
Okay.
(cheering)
Hi.
Hey, who are you?
This is Brett.
Hi.
Hi.
I was just inviting
Margaret to come join
me and my wife in the back.
A few other friends are coming.
Cool.
Let's do it.
Okay?
Sure.
Cool.
I'm gonna go put my sh*t down.
(murmuring)
Sure.
(cheers)
It's the first coat he
ever bought for himself
as an adult.
No it's not.
I bought the last
one you replaced
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"The Videoblogs" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 12 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_videoblogs_21577>.
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