The West Point Story Page #9

What can he do?

Plenty. Listen to this:

"The shah of Iran at West Point.

Secures amnesty for cadets."

You see, Bix,

amnesty is a famous custom up here.

Royalty, heads of state,

kings, queens, all diplomats...

...when visiting West Point

are given reviews.

They lay out the red carpet,

and in return, they can request amnesty.

A pardon, remember?

Just like the princess bit in the show.

Sure. Last fall, the shah of Iran.

A lot of us were slugged,

couldn't go the Army-Navy game...

...he came and got us off the hook.

Well, if Donet can do that for us,

I'll have him up here...

...if I have to carry him

all the way on my back.

Now, trick is, how to get in to see him?

Who do we know?

My girl's mother knows

the secretary of state.

- My uncle knows Gen. Eisenhower.

- My father knows Gen. Bradley.

- I know Touture.

- One of our best officers.

How many of you

have weekend leave?

- All of us.

- Well, then, pile in. Come on.

And you, sweetheart, hold the fort

and I'll bring you a Frenchman.

But, David, the whole idea

is absolutely impossible.

But, Dad, if you can't do this little favor,

what's the use of your being a senator?

Sometimes I wonder.

I wonder myself.

Yes.

Yes, sir. I know, sir...

But will you at least mention it

to the honorable secretary of state?

He's in Europe?

Well, whereabouts in Europe?

You can't just brush this off.

This is really important.

- And you tell me you can do nothing.

- I've tried my best, Mr. Bixby.

But the premier is locked up

in conference with the president.

He said he's very sorry,

but it is impossible for him to see you.

A fine way to treat a taxpayer. Come on.

Hello?

Charlie and I waited outside

the French Embassy all day.

We find out the premier went

from the White House to New York.

Then we go to New York.

- Take us to the airport.

- Yes, sir.

This is very tragic, monsieur.

But it is impossible

for His Excellency to see you.

He's very busy.

- I speak English, monsieur.

- Then you know what this mission is about?

Yes, and it leaves me

in the most embarrassing position.

Well, Your Excellency,

I don't wanna take up your time...

...to tell you about the Gls

and cadets up at West Point...

...who fought to help liberate France

and their friendship with the French people.

Yes, but how come, monsieur?

- I'm a guest of your country.

- Yeah.

Your State Department

has made plans for me.

I know, Excellency.

But these cadets need liberation now.

And you are the one man in the country

who can ask for amnesty and get it.

You just can't refuse.

If the French people hear about this...

These things do have a way of getting back.

Monsieur, I'm very sorry,

but it is absolutely impossible.

Impossible?

Well, didn't wanna do this...

...and I'm very sorry

to have to flash that on you.

This is our highest decoration.

Some way or another, monsieur,

it will be arranged.

I shall be very glad to be of service.

I didn't know you spoke French.

Picked it up from a chick

at the Folies Bergre.

Your request for amnesty

shall be granted.

You saved them. Bix, you saved them.

You know, I like kissing you much better

than I do the premier.

Do I have to curtsy?

My girl's out there.

My father and mother are out there too.

I'll never live this down.

- Couldn't I just bow?

- And destroy the whole illusion?

Come on, chin up, princess,

and suck up that royal gut.

Sir, the princess has arrived.

You love me

You love me

The miracle of miracles

You love me

In every dream

You seem so unattainable

- It's not...

- It's not explainable

And yet you're mine

You're mine

Believe me

- Jan's back.

- Yeah.

Relax, princess, you got a reprieve.

I'm sure this heart of mine

Would not deceive me

And even if you never say it

This I know is true

- You love me

- You love me

- Just as I love you

- Just as I love you

Just think.

If we were only opening with this show

on Broadway tonight.

It isn't going to open on Broadway,

and never will.

When that curtain goes down tonight,

they'll stick it in the archives.

And for all the future I have,

they might just as well stick me with it.

How do you like it, Bix, huh?

You look fine, son. Fine.

Don't go far away.

- You'll be on in a few minutes.

- Okay, Bix.

Eve, I've been mulling this thing over.

If that job in Las Vegas is still open...

...I suggest you grab it.

Las Vegas?

Bix, I'm your memory.

I'm your feet.

You can't work without me.

Work?

In a few minutes,

I'm gonna be out of a job.

And jobs are gonna be awfully scarce

on Broadway.

- Especially for me.

- You can say that again.

You double-crossed me again.

Tom was almost busted out of this place

and you got him back in. Now, why?

Because the kid wants to graduate

from West Point.

Being in the Army means more to him

than anything else in the world.

Didn't wanna see his career ruined.

- Couldn't have it on my conscience.

- Your conscience?

Oh, that's a laugh.

Now, let me tell you something.

I asked them to give me this play

to do on Broadway. I'm gonna get it.

But you're not going to do it.

And do you know why?

Because you've double-crossed me

for the last time.

You're through, you're dead,

you're washed up.

You'll never work in show business again

as long as you live.

I'll see to that.

- I'm through, I'm all washed up.

- For good!

Well, in that case,

I've got nothing to lose.

- Hal.

- Hal.

Hal.

Hal.

Are you hurt, huh? Get out.

- How are you?

- I guess I forgot to duck.

How do you feel?

Do you think you could go on?

- All right, I think.

- You think?

Well, get on your feet

and see how you are.

- What is it?

- My knee.

Your knee?

Well, punch-happy, what do we do now?

Go get ready.

Attention.

You there, where are you from?

San Francisco, sir.

- You?

- Well, I'm from Texas.

- How about you?

- Los Angeles.

- You?

- I'm from Boston.

I suppose you're not interested in hearing

where I come from.

- What?

- I said:

"I suppose you're not interested

in hearing where I come from."

- All right, where are you from?

- Me?

I'm from:

B-postrophe, K-no-postrophe, L-Y-N

They know my shield

From Ebbets Field to Cheyenne

You can keep those other places

Just give me that oasis

Where it's "erl," not "oil"

And a girl's a goil

And goils are goils at 28 paces

B-postrophe, K-no-postrophe, L-Y-N

That's the place I make me home in.

They know my shield

From Ebbets Field to Cheyenne

That's a spot out in Wyoming.

The Manhattanites don't want us

Heap abuse upon us

They will gladly yell we are not Chanel

But Chanel don't smell

Quite like the Gowanus

B-postrophe, K-no-postrophe, L-Y-N

Your mother wears suspenders.

Agree or not

We're just as hot as cayenne

And when they ask

"Are you going my way?"

They're asking you

To take a walk up King's Highway

B-postrophe, K-no-postrophe, L-Y-N

It could only happen in Brooklyn

On a street called Avenue D

If you've never been there

You'll tell me it can't

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