The Wiz Page #2

- New York?

- 433 Prospect Place.

Ooh! Four, three, three.

You wanna play more than

one number today, honey?

I got a freedom special,

three numbers for the price...

No, I don't wanna play any numbers.

I just wanna get home!

Oh, well, now that ol'

Evermean's number's up...

...that leaves only

three witches in Oz.

One, myself, but my powers

don't amount to much.

And number two, Glinda,

the Good Witch of the South.

Oh, she's a real star,

but you can hardly catch her in.

And number three, the multi-horrored

Evillene, the Wicked Witch of the West.

Evermean's even uglier sister!

But I don't think it'd be

a good time to ask her for a favor.

So I figured the odds are only the Wiz

could cipher how to get you back to...

So I figured the odds are only the Wiz

could cipher how to get you back to...

- Where'd you say that place was?

- The Wiz?

What's a Wiz?

What's a... What's a Wiz?

Oh, darlin', he's the ultimate.

The "X" quotient, the new math.

The common denominator,

the main man.

The head honcho!

Bottom line, honey.

Numero uno!

- Where is he? How do I find him?

- Catch this number, honey.

# Sweet thing

let me tell you about #

# The world and

the way things are now #

# You've come from

a different place #

# And I know you've

traveled far #

# Now that you've told me

what it is #

# I better point you

towards the Wiz #

- # He's the Wiz #

- # He's the man He's the only one #

# Who can give your wish

right to ya #

# He'll send you back

through time #

# By runnin' magic through ya #

# All of his super power's his #

# Dot dot da dot da #

# Listen and I'll tell you

where he is #

# He's the Wiz and he lives #

# In Oz #

- # He's the Wizard #

- # There's the way #

# To the Emerald City

That's not too far, is it #

- # He's the Wizard #

- # Just take your dilemma, child #

# And lay it on the Wizard #

# He'll fix you a drink

that'll bubble and foam #

# Dot dot da dot da #

# And in a flash

you will be home #

- # He's the Wiz #

- # He's the Wiz He's the Wizard of Oz #

- # He's got magic up his sleeve #

- # He's the Wizard #

# And you know without his help #

# It would be

impossible to leave #

# Fantastic powers

at his command #

Whoo!

# And I'm sure

that he will understand #

# He's the Wiz and he lives #

# In Oz #

# Sweet thing, let me tell you about #

# The world and the way

things are now #

# And I'd better point ya

towards the Wiz #

Whee! Ooh!

Whee!

He's the Wiz!

# Fantastic powers at his command #

# I'm sure that

he will understand #

# He's the Wiz and he lives #

# In Oz #

# Sweet thing

let me tell you about #

# The world and the way

things are now #

# You come from a different place

and I know you traveled far #

# Now that you've

told me what it is #

# I'd better point you

toward the Wiz #

# Dot dot da dot da

dot dot da dot da #

# He's the Wiz ##

But how do I get

to the Emerald City?

Count your blessings, cut your losses

and follow the Yellow Brick Road.

- The Yellow Brick Road?

Yeah! The Yellow Brick Road!

Yellow Brick. Toto!

Remember, don't ever take those shoes

off and watch out for the poison poppies!

Wait.

Miss One?

Miss One?

Miss One!

Miss One!

# There's a feeling #

# Here inside #

# That I cannot hide #

# And I know I've tried #

# But it's turning me #

# Around #

# I'm not sure that I'm aware #

# If I'm up or down #

# Or here or there #

# I need both feet

on the ground #

# Maybe I'm just goin' crazy #

# Lettin' myself get uptight #

# I'm actin' just like a baby #

# But I'm gonna be #

# I'm gonna be all right #

# Soon as I get home #

# Soon as I get home #

# Soon as I get home #

# In a different place #

# In a different time #

# Different people around me #

# I would like to know #

# Of their different world and how #

# Different they find me #

# And just what's a Wiz #

# Is he big

Will he scare me #

# If I ask to leave #

# Will the Wiz even hear me #

# How will I know then #

# If I'll ever get home again #

# Here I am alone

though it feels the same #

# I don't know where I'm goin' #

# I'm here on my own

and it's not a game #

# And a strange #

# Wind is blowin' #

# I'm so amazed at the things

that I see here #

# Don't wanna be afraid

I just don't wanna be here #

# In my mind this is clear #

# What am I doin' #

# Here #

# I wish #

# I was home #

# I wish, I wish #

# I wish I was ##

Wait! Mister, please wait!

Ha, ha, ha, ha!

Succulent and divine!

- Delicious and nutritious.

- Brother crows, this is good stuff!

I'm glad you fellows

are enjoying your breakfast.

Is today the day you're gonna

help me get down from here?

Help you down?

What is goin' down in

that hayloft you call a head?

Didn't we tell you yesterday

and the day before that...

- And the day before that...

- That you can't get down?

This is your life,

buddy, all hung up!

Besides, Clyde...

...us crows are just thinkin' of you.

There ain't nothin'

to get down for!

But I was

just thinkin', just once, fellas...

...for a little while to walk in my garden,

wouldn't that be terrific?

- Walk!

- You can't walk!

Why, you just

a straw paper dummy!

You're right, fellas.

I was just bein' selfish.

And stupid as usual!

- But I was readin' this morning that most people...

- Oh, man!

Look, didn't we tell you

readin' was a waste of time?

- But Bacon here said...

- Bacon? Once over lightly, please!

"Knowledge is power. "

- See, and, uh, Cicero, he said...

- Cicero-ro-row!

"More men are ennobled

by study than by nature. "

And over here, especially

apropos in my situation...

...i. E., stuck up on this here pole:

"Do not accept any situation.

Question, argue and explore. "

Now who you gonna believe?

- Mr. Nobody on that paper?

- Fellas, please!

Or your good friends, the crows?

Yeah, who have dedicated

their lives to educatin' you.

- Yeah!

- Sounds to me, fellas...

...like ol' garbage guts here done forgot

the crow commandments again.

Fellas, I did not forget

the crow commandments. Please!

Run 'em by me!

Run 'em by me.

- Thou shalt honor all crows.

- Right on!

- Proceed!

- Thou shalt stop readin' all bits of paper and literature.

- Trash! Trash!

- And the most important one!

Thou shalt never, never get down

off of this here pole!

You got it, Clyde!

And the crow anthem!

I gotta sing that thing again?

# You gotta libretti it

'til you get it #

- # Elucidate #

- # Reiterate #

# And syncopate #

# You can't win

You can't break even #

# And you can't get

outta the game #

# People keep sayin' #

# Things are gonna change

but they look just like #

# They're stayin' the same #

# You get in way over your head #

# And you only got yourself

to blame #

- # You can't win, child #

- # You can't win, child #

# You can't break even #

# You can't get outta the game #

# You can't win

The world keeps movin' #

# And you're standin' far behind #

# People keep sayin' #

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