The World of Henry Orient Page #5

the sort of thing Paul would think of.

- Girl detectives nobody would suspect.

- That's the nastiest thing I ever heard of.

The unfair thing about it is I haven't done

anything, not one single blessed thing.

Except for listening to music.

Imagine being busted in on

by a couple of little punks like that.

Once a man thinks his wife's been

in another man's apartment,

even in broad daylight, wild horses

wouldn't interest him in the truth.

No matter what I say to him, he'll put the

most sordid construction possible on it.

He'll go absolutely stark raving mad!

I know it!

Yeah? How big is he?

I gotta get outta here, Mr Orient.

Is there a back entrance?

There is, but you're going out of

the front door so they can see you leaving.

- Are you crazy?

- I'm not crazy.

You want them to say you stayed here,

and have him come here with a gun?

You're gonna go straight

out of the front door,

as if you owned the whole building,

so if they do happen to turn in a report,

you can draw their attention to the fact

that you were hardly here long enough...

This must not be a typical day.

- Shall we try again next Saturday?

- What about...?

You've got nothing to worry about.

Don't even look in their direction.

Grab the first taxi you see. Tell him

to step on it to Grand Central Station.

You got nothing to worry about.

It's gonna be perfectly... all right.

- Come again sometime.

- Thank you so much, Mr Orient.

- Bring Mr Dunhill with you next time.

- Dunworthy.

Either one you wish.

Bonsoir. Good afternoon.

Val, no!

What?

- Jayne Mansfield?

- Jayne Man...?

Mom!

Mom? Mom?

Mom!

Darling, please.

You don't wanna break my neck, do you?

- Why didn't you let me know?

- You knew we'd come for the holidays.

Please, dear. How could you forget?

My goodness me, but you've grown.

I never would have known you.

Dirty face. What are you doing

with these peculiar hats on?

- This is Marian Gilbert. My mother.

- How do you do, Marian?

- Fine, thank you.

- Are you playing Chinese?

- Where's Dad?

- He had to go straight to the office.

He's gonna come back for dinner with us.

How about The Four Seasons?

- Wild! Can Gilbert go with us?

- Thanks, but I can't make it tonight.

I'm terribly sorry, dear. Perhaps

you'll make it another night with us.

- How long will it take you to pack?

- Right now?

- That's OK. I've gotta be going anyway.

- I'll be ready in five minutes.

I'll be upstairs with Mrs Hambler.

Don't waste time.

I've got some people

coming for drinks at five o'clock.

Goodbye, Marian.

I know we'll be seeing you soon.

I hope so.

Boy, am I gonna get some goodies now.

Four Seasons, 21.

That's the only kind of place they go to.

And someplace where everything's on fire

when they bring it. I may get the gout.

- You're not coming back here at night?

- No. They usually take a room for me too.

And you oughta see the clothes.

Bergdorf, Saks, Hattie Carnegie.

That's the one break when they don't want

you - plenty of loot when they do show up.

- How long d'you think they'll be here?

- Till after New Year's usually.

If they don't get fed up with me first.

- See you.

- Wait. We'll drive you home.

Gilbert?

Gilbert! Gilbert!

Mrs Boyd, what should I do

about her laundry?

If you don't mind, send it over to the hotel.

We're at the Melton.

Oh, darling. Didn't I ask you to hurry?

I'm sorry.

- What is it?

- Nothing.

Couldn't you have phoned

and said I was sick or something?

Now stop being childish.

The fact that Val wants to be

with her mother and father

has nothing to do with your friendship.

- She could have at least phoned.

- Behave yourself.

Merry Christmas, everybody!

- Hello, I'm Marian's mother.

- Hello, Marian. How are you?

- Miss Gilbert, isn't it?

- This is Mr Boyd.

This is Mrs Gilbert

and this must be Boothy.

I knew it. Won't you all come on in

and have a drink?

- It's so sweet of you to...

- Darling!

Perfectly lovely that you could come!

We have some absolutely

fascinating people for you to meet.

Very strict around here.

- Mrs Gilbert, I missed you.

- We've missed you too, you little scamp.

- Hi, Boothy.

- Those big feet pounding up the stairs.

Won't you come and meet our guests?

Will either of you ladies be traditional

with me and have an eggnog?

Or is it going to be martinis for you?

- I'll be trad, Dad. Where's the bowl?

- I'll get one for each of you.

- Aren't you wearing stockings?

- Ever since I got here.

- I've got something to tell you.

- How do you keep 'em up?

Mrs Gilbert is the mother

of one of Valerie's school friends.

Just a smidgen higher

with that hideous little angel.

Comment a va, Miss Manhattan?

- Is it some kind of corset?

- Garter belt.

- See that fella playing the piano?

- Let me see.

- Doesn't it cut?

- Of course not.

His name is Joe Daniels

and I had a date with him.

- He's as old as the hills.

- Over 30 easily, and he's married.

- Where was his wife?

- They're busted up.

Did you neck?

Here you are, girls.

Just don't gulp it down.

Thanks.

One other thing.

Don't do any more driving tonight.

- He's cute.

- He's sweeter than he used to be.

- Did you neck?

- It was at Schrafft's, crazy!

I asked him to lunch there.

You mean, you made the date?

Look, you've got to promise not to say

a word about this to anybody ever.

Of course not. We've got a blood pact.

- On the bones of your ancestors?

- I do.

OK. I made the date

because I wanted to talk to him

about how much he'd been seeing Mom

when Dad wasn't here.

- Think they were passing at each other?

- I don't know, but I didn't want Dad hurt.

Hi.

- Who are you?

- Valerie.

- Valerie who?

- Valerie Boyd.

Oh, I see. Isabel's kid.

Who's that with you?

Marian Gilbert,

a friend of mine from Norton.

You mustn't expect me to talk with you.

I don't know what the hell

to talk about with school children.

- Will you excuse us, please?

- You can bet your sweet little...

- We'll go to my room.

- Did you tell Dr Greentree?

You think I'm crazy?

- You artists.

- That's supposed to be a secret.

I should certainly hope so.

All we were doing was pretending.

- How did you meet Mr Orient?

- We've never met him.

- Stop it.

- Honestly, Mrs Boyd, we haven't.

- I wasn't speaking to you, Marian.

- I wouldn't go in any of your things.

Will you please excuse me?

You tell me, kid, if she's too tough on you.

- You should be going too.

- I'd like to stay, if you don't mind.

- I do mind.

- It was just make-believe.

Good night, Marian.

Why don't you call her, darling,

and see if she can come?

The operator says they don't take

any phone calls before noon.

What about the gifts?

They gave them to her last night

so they could sleep late.

The sort of thoughtfulness that never

would have occurred to Mr Dickens.

- We'll set a place for her just in case.

- They'll never let her out today.

- Hello.

- This is Isabel Boyd.

- Good morning, Mrs Boyd.

- Can I talk to Val, Mom? Can I?

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