The Wrestler Page #5

great neighborhood, and... cheaper.

What about your gig over at, uh, Cheeques?

Done. Quitting.

- Oh, wow.

- Yeah.

Whoa! Hell, yeah!

All right!

Come on, baby.

- Dance with me.

- Here?

- Yeah, right here. Come on.

- Uh-uh.

- Come on.

- I-I've danced to this plenty.

Okay. I'll dance for you then.

Here we go.

That's where we meet

- Think I can get you a shift.

- Hey, man, I need a job.

There we go.

Ooh! It's a lap dance I'm getting.

I knew right from the beginning

That you would end up winning

I knew right from the start

You'd put an arrow

Through my heart

Round and round

Yeah! Goddamn, they don't make 'em

like they used to.

- F***in' '80s, man. Best sh*t ever.

- Bet your ass, man.

- Guns N' Roses f***in' rules.

- Cre.

- Yeah.

- Def Lep.

Then that Cobain p*ssy had to come around

and ruin it all.

Like there's something wrong

with wanting to have a good time.

I'll tell you something.

I hated the f***in' '90s.

- Nineties f***in' sucked.

- Nineties f***in' sucked.

- Sh*t.

- What's the matter?

No contact with the customers.

I gotta go.

Hey. You said one beer.

- I did?

- Yeah.

Oh, okay.

I knew right from the beginning

That you would end up winning

I knew right

- From the start

- One beer.

You'd put an arrow through my heart

Round

Here you go.

Hey, bro.

This is supposed to say "Randy. "

I guess they got it off your W-4 or something.

So I really gotta wear one of these things?

No, you're special.

Well, uh, can you change it?

Just wear the f***in' thing, all right?

Ah.

Oh, f***.

Uh, here's your bologna, pal.

Eighteen.

Are- Are they all on sale,

or just the regular ones?

- The Hudson Acres. Uh-

- Well, it wasn't very clear.

- Let me check.

- Okay.

Wayne, to the deli counter.

It'll just be a minute.

Okay. So, uh, which, in your opinion,

is the best smoked ham?

- The best what?

- Smoked ham.

- Uh-

- Which?

I don't-

Smoked ham, I guess-

Uh, the maple-glazed is not bad.

- Breasts, thighs.

- Breasts, thighs.

- Small pieces.

- Right.

- Lock it up. Push start.

- Yes.

Forty-six.

- What would you like?

- Can I have a half a pound of pesto pasta salad?

Okay. Comin' up.

Half a pound of pesto pasta on the button.

- Can I get you anything else?

- No, that's it.

- You have a lovely day, darling.

- Thanks. You too.

Forty-seven.

- Let me get a eight-piece, uh, chicken.

- What kind of chicken you want?

I want a eight-piece.

That's two breasts.

- Give me two big breasts.

- Two big breasts, coming up.

That's what I want. Two big breasts.

Two big breasts-

Uh, something with a brain.

- And two wings? Yeah, stay away from them thighs.

- Yeah.

A lot of chicken flying out the door.

There you go, honey. Have a good day.

- Thank you. Have a good day.

- Who's next?

- Me.

- What you having, good-looking?

- Uh, half a pound of egg salad.

- Half a pound of egg salad, coming up.

- Here we go.

- Fresh?

- Fresh? Fresh as monkey's breath, brother.

- Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

This is the good stuff.

Comin' up.

Down and out. Come on.

It's the fourth quarter.

Come on. Come on. Come on.

There's 12 seconds left.

Go. Down and out. Here. Both hands.

Hey! Touchdown! Goddamn!

How about them Cowboys?

- What you having, spring chicken?

- Hi.

Okay.

- Hey, Migg, how you doing?

- Who is this?

- Yeah, it's the Ram.

- Hey, Ram. Good to hear from you. We gonna see you in two weeks?

- Yeah, sure. Yeah. Yeah.

- It's gonna be big. I got 12 calls already.

Listen, uh, you're gonna have to count me out of Utica.

What do you mean?

We've been selling tickets for a week!

Nah, I'm retiring.

- Hey, Frank, how you doin'

- Good, Ram. Good. How are you?

Nah, I'm good, man. I'm good.

Uh, listen.

Oh, come on. I'm sorry, Volpe.

You know I'd kill to do it.

- I already bought Bob's plane ticket.

- No, I realize. I understand.

- I think you're making a big mistake.

- Nah, no more. I am done.

- I'm retired.

- Yeah, I- I- I know.

Stephanie.

What, are you stalking me?

No. I, uh, brought you a present.

Go ahead. Open it.

The "S" stands for "Stephanie. "

- Oh, yeah.

- Yeah.

Do you like it?

It's, uh-

It's shiny.

That's not really your present.

I got you something else.

Hold on.

This is your real present.

- It's a peacoat.

- Yeah. Well, it's wintertime...

and I want you to keep warm.

- Thank you.

- Hey, anything for you, sweetheart.

So what are you doing right now?

What am I doing?

You know, I thought maybe we could,

you know, stop by our old favorite place.

We have an old favorite place?

You'll recognize it when you see it.

Uh, now's not really the best time. I-

I got some stuff I gotta do.

What kind of stuff?

Just stuff.

Come on.

I'm not gonna, like-

I'm not gonna take a bite out of you or anything.

Just, you know,

hang out for a little while.

I haven't been here in ages.

You remember the fun house?

Right there.

Used to be the Monster Motel.

- Kinda.

- Oh, you loved it.

We used to go in there,

and they had this, uh, spooky-ass skeleton.

It would pop out of a coffin.

You'd get really scared and cry

and wanna run out.

And then- then you'd beg to go back in again.

Oh. Always was a glutton for punishment.

Yeah, you wouldn't go in

unless you could sit on my foot...

and wrap your arms around my leg.

And we'd walk all the way through like that.

Ah, I don't even remember that.

I do.

I just want to tell you.

I'm the one...

who was supposed to take care of everything.

I'm the one who was supposed

to make everything okay for everybody.

But it just didn't work out like that.

And I left.

I left you.

You never did anything wrong.

You know?

I used to try to-

Huh! Forget about you.

I used to try to pretend that...

you didn't exist.

But I can't.

You're my girl.

You're my little-

You're my little girl.

And now-

I'm an old, broken-down piece of meat.

And I'm alone.

And I deserve to be all alone.

I just don't want you to hate me.

Okay?

Hey.

Oh.

Oh, man, we can't go in there.

Come on.

Oh, God.

- Whoo, man. Wow.

- This must have been a ballroom or something.

Oh, look at this.

We can-

Hey, here we go.

- What is that?

- It's my bow to you.

Am I supposed to bow back?

I bow to you?

Ah.

One, two, three.

One, two, three. One, two, three.

You can lead.

You're not bad.

Well, thank you.

Hold on.

Wait.

Let me get the door.

Well, I hope that wasn't too painful for you.

- No, it was okay.

- Yeah, well-

Okay, uh, bye.

Bye.

Hey, maybe we could go out to dinner sometime.

- Dinner?

- You know, on Friday or something?

Whatever works for you.

Saturday would be better.

- Saturday?

- Yeah.

You got it.

Oh, wow.

Wow.

Hey, you there. Hey.

Come on. Open it.

I'll wait till later when it's quiet.

Oh, come on.

I want to watch your face when you read it.

Thank you.

That's very sweet.

Hey, thank you.

I mean, come on, baby. You saved my ass.

What?

I can't... do this.

Can't do what?

This.

I thought we had a little something

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