Tin Cup Page #7

37.

where Boone has arrived with his caddie at his drive.

TIN CUP:

Yep, I caught this thing way the

Hell on the toe.

Boone knocks an iron onto the edge of the green.

BOONE:

Drive for show, putt for dough, big

shot.

TIN CUP:

Did you hear that, Romeo? Boone

was being profound! He has

revealed to me the essential

mystery of golf! Drive for show,

putt for dough...

(holds out

a palm)

Louisville Slugger, please.

Boone's a little rattled by Tin Cup's insouciance.

ROMEO:

You got Boone shakin' already -(

studying the

approach)

Front left bunker's your best

angle to the pin.

TIN CUP:

(calling his shot)

Front left bunker -- plugged lie.

He tosses up the ball and fungoes a lazy fly ball.

CUT TO:

35 EXT. MESQUITE 1ST GREEN AND SAND TRAP - DAY 35

Boone gazes with malicious delight at Tin Cup's ball,

buried in the front left bunker. He watches Tin Cup take

the hoe from Romeo and move down into the trap.

BOONE:

I want to see a legitimate swing.

No scooping.

Tin Cup holds up a hand like a gallery marshal requesting

silence.

TIN CUP:

Stand, please. Gallery, please,

stand.

38.

He addresses the ball, choking down on the hoe,

positioning the blade at an odd angle. He hacks at the

ball with an unorthodox chopping motion. The ball pops

up in the air, lands on the green, releases and rolls up

a foot from the hole.

Boone's jaw drops. Tin Cup hit an impossible shot with

utter ease and facility.

TIN CUP:

I'll finish.

Tin Cup trades Romeo the shovel for the rake, takes the

pin out of the hole, and pool cues the putt home. Par.

Boone looks at his own sixty-foot putt and he knows he's

just been had... utterly, embarrassingly, and thoroughly.

Without a word he counts four hundred dollars from his

roll and drops it on the green.

BOONE:

Get the hell off my course.

38 EXT. PAWN SHOP - DAY 38

Tin Cup and Romeo emerge, Romeo carrying T.C.'s sticks.

TIN CUP:

Listen, swami, your job is to

teach me patience and humility,

not to advise me on my love life.

ROMEO:

No. My job is to get your head

straight so you can qualify for

The Open, much less win it. To

get your head straight you got to

forget about the doctor lady.

They head up the street under a collonade toward Tin

Cup's waiting Caddy.

TIN CUP:

Not all my thinking occurs below

the belt. I actually stand for a

few things beside where my next

romantic interlude is coming from.

ROMEO:

Then you got no problem telling

the doctor lady you can't teach

her no more till after the Open.

Tin Cup blinks silently a moment, feeling slightly cornered.

39.

TIN CUP:

That would make an issue of

something that ain't an issue.

Besides, I'm focused.

Romeo responds with a Spanish curse.

TIN CUP:

I mean, this is my quest!

ROMEO:

Ahhh... your quest... chingaso...

TIN CUP:

This is where I stand up for all

the little guys everywhere who've

had their fill of soulless robots

like David Simms -

ROMEO:

He may be a soulless robot but

he's a rich, happy soulless robot

with a beautiful doctor lady

girlfriend who's got you by the

huevos -

(beat)

Besides, how is getting into the

U.S. Open gonna change what she

thinks about you?

TIN CUP:

It'll prove to her that I'm not

who she thinks I am.

ROMEO:

But you are who she thinks you

are! Look, I don't bet on a

horse with a hard-on.

TIN CUP:

Hard-on?! Hard-on?! Hard-on?!

Here, touch me, feel -

(as Tin Cup grabs

himself)

I don't feel nothing! Here!

ROMEO:

(embarrassed)

Hey, hey... sh*t... cool it...

39

Suddenly a convertible passes -- Simms and Molly, 39

laughing, carefree, enjoying each other. The couple in

the car doesn't see Tin Cup grabbing his crotch making

a fool of himself on the sidewalk -- but Tin Cup and

Romeo see them.

40.

The car disappears down the street. Tin Cup cools off,

chilled, really -- and full of chagrin.

TIN CUP:

Okay, okay... maybe I got a semi.

CUT TO:

40 INT. GOLDEN TASSEL - DOREEN'S DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT 40

Doreen's on the phone, between shows, and is adamant.

DOREEN:

I cannot give you time off to winThe Open. I don't care if it's

your 'quest'...

(listens)

... or your 'destiny'...

(listens)

... or any of those terms youvaguely remember from your CliffNotes...

(listens)

You shoulda treated me nicer when

we were an item -- then maybe Iwouldn't be such a nasty boss.

G'bye, Roy -- I have a business to

run.

She hangs up and heads out on stage as the music calls.

CUT TO:

41 INT. DRIVING RANGE - NIGHT 41

Tin Cup hangs up the phone and turns to Romeo.

TIN CUP:

Man, ever since I let her dump myass she just can't resist kickingme in it.

ROMEO:

Maybe you should treat her morelike a lady.

TIN CUP:

After she ran off with that Dallas

banker?

ROMEO:

She did that after you let herdump you. It wouldn't kill youjust once to tell her she'sbeautiful, she can dance, she's

41.

sexy.

TIN CUP:

Romeo... are you sweet on Doreen?

ROMEO:

No more'n you are for that doctor

lady.

A couple of deep sighs.

hearts.

Two losers with fluttering

TIN CUP:

Great, Romeo, just great... just

when I need you to be my friend

and coach, you go get all gooey

about one of my ex-girlfriends

who just happens to be our boss.

ROMEO:

Anybody comes to me for help on

their love life about women is

already too far gone.

TIN CUP:

I don't recall asking you for

advice.

(beat)

Women are tougher to figure out

than a feathered one iron from a

tight lie -

Suddenly a golf image relaxes them into their comfort

zone.

ROMEO:

Actually if you open the club face

a hair and play it off your back

foot -

TIN CUP:

Shut up, Romeo... I wasn't really

seeking golf tips...

ROMEO:

It's all I'm good for -- but you

can count on me for that, at

least.

TIN CUP:

How far off the back foot?

ROMEO:

'Bout three balls...

Silence. Golf is so much easier than life.

42.

TIN CUP:

I'm ready to charge forth in

pursuit of my mythic destiny and I

can't get time off work to do it.

ROMEO:

I'm no expert, but it seems to me

that the `pursuit of a person's

mythic destiny' is not the sort of

thing that a person needs to get

off a five dollar an hour job in

order to do...

TIN CUP:

I'm stuck. Buried. My life's a

plugged lie in a kakuyi bunker

with a tight pin position on a

green with a stimp meter reading

of thirteen.

(beat)

I need help. I need advice. I

need counsel...

(beat)

I need a shrink.

ROMEO:

You don't know no shrinks.

TIN CUP:

I know one.

ROMEO:

Not the doctor lady?

TIN CUP:

Why not?

ROMEO:

You can't ask advice about the

woman you're trying to hose from

the woman you're trying to hose!

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