Tin Men Page #8

MAN:

What's that?

SAM:

I found a five-dollar bill, here

by the side of the chair.

CUT TO:

53 INT. CORRAL CLUB - NIGHT 53

The place is crowded... jumping with activity. A local

band is playing on a tiny stage. BB's on the floor

dancing with a girl. He's doing some good moves, and

it's obvious that he's a real crowd pleaser. Sitting

at the bar are Looney, Stanley and Carly.

CARLY:

The buzzard had a great gimmick.

You know, when it came time to

measure a job, he'd cut the

yardstick and reglue it together

... he took out seven inches so

his square footage would always

be higher. That way he'd always

make a few extra bucks on the job.

(CONTINUED)

48.

53 CONTINUED:
53

Stanley laughs and looks at Carly.

STANLEY:

You're kidding?

CARLY:

Yeah... he'd always put his

hand over the break when he was

measuring. Nobody looks at a

yardstick to see how long it is.

LOONEY:

(laughs)

I never did that... I never did

that... I was never very good in

arts and crafts. I could never

make the ruler come out right.

The song ends.

ANGLE ON BB:

He pats his dancing partner on her rear, she walks back

to her table, and BB walks over to where Moe is sitting.

BB picks up his beer can, holds it up to Moe as if he's

going to make a toast.

BB:

Here's to Nora.

Moe smiles, picks up his can, they tap their cans, and

both take a swig of their beers.

ANGLE ON BAR:

Stanley is really enjoying the stories Carly and Looney

are telling.

STANLEY:

What else? Give me another story

... these stories are great!

LOONEY:

Just a minute... I've got one.

You know it's like the faster you

can start spiking a job, the guy

can't back out of the deal.

(MORE)

(CONTINUED)

49.

53 CONTINUED:
(2) 53

LOONEY (CONT'D)

Shoe had some customers that he

thought was fragile on coming forthe buy. He'd say to the guy'here let me show you how bad ashape your house is in,' and he'drip off a piece of wood, maybefifteen feet wide. The guy'shouse looks like sh*t so it makes

it hard for him to back out of

the deal when half the side of

his house is missing. The Shoe's

a f***ing wonder.

CUT TO:

54 INT. SAM'S CAR - NIGHT 54

Sam is driving and Tilley is rubbing his hands togetherwith excitement.

TILLEY:

Fantastic, Sam! A twenty-sevenhundred sale! 'This job is free'!

What a beaut! I'm out of the

slump! Tilley's riding high again... Tilley's back! We ought togo and celebrate. Let's go tothe Corral and have a drink...

we can turn the paperwork in alittle later.

SAM:

Gil says that's where 'Marengay'hangs out.

TILLEY:

Gil keeps saying it... I've neverseen him.

(laughing and hitting

the dashboard)

I'm riding high... twenty-sevenhundred dollars... 'this job isfree'... the man went insane...

lost control of himself... his

wife and children are out on the

street!

(he laughs)

Sometimes I'm brilliant... I'm

f***ing brilliant... I can'tbelieve it.

CUT TO:

50.

55 INT. CORRAL CLUB - ANGLE ON MOE AND BB - NIGHT 55

They're looking at the girls, sizing them up.

BB:

(pointing to a

girl)

See that one, if you were married

to that one two weeks you'd have

to put your head out of the window

for air... this one smothers.

(looking over to

another girl)

That one is the kind that can't

live without you...

(whiney voice)

... 'Where were you? When will

you be home?'

MOE:

I should get out of here. I told

my wife I'd be home early tonight.

BB:

Christ! It's not even one o'clock

yet.

(beat)

How long you been married now?

What is it? Twelve... twelve

years?

MOE:

Sixteen.

BB:

Holy God! Sixteen years? What

do you think? Is it worth it?

MOE:

Yeah.

BB:

Why do you think?

MOE:

It's hard to answer.

(beat)

Seems better than if she wasn't

there.

BB:

Quite a recommendation... can't

wait to do it.

He laughs.

(CONTINUED)

51.

55 CONTINUED:
55

ANGLE ON DOOR:

Tilley and Sam come through the door and walk over to

the bar.

TILLEY:

(to Sam)

Scotch straight up?

SAM:

Yeah.

TILLEY:

(to barman)

Scotch straight up and a rum

and Coke for me.

He looks around the room at the women.

TILLEY:

Looks like there's good action

here tonight.

SAM:

What do you expect, it's half

price night for divorced women.

The place is hopping.

ANGLE ON BB AND MOE

BB:

Look how much more complicated

things are now. There used to

be a time you met a girl, you

courted and then you got married

and lived happily ever after.

Now, see that one over there...

(he points to

girl at a table)

... that's Helen Armstrong...

maiden name used to be Tudor.

Get this, she dated Charlie

Rider when I was in high school,

seemed like they were together

forever. They broke up, she

started to go with Lenny

Mardigian, they got married,

she's Helen Mardigian. That

goes on two years... three years,

something like that.

(MORE)

(CONTINUED)

52.

55 CONTINUED:
(2) 55

BB (CONT'D)

They divorce, dates Billy Small

for a couple of years, lives with

John Isaacs for a year, marries

Tommy Selnini... that marriage

goes in the toilet, but fast.

Now she's dating Charlie Rider

who was divorced by Evelyn Chartoff

who used to be Evelyn Gage before

that.

(beat; he looks at

Moe and laughs)

So much for relationships.

ANGLE ON SAM AND TILLEY AT BAR

SAM:

I'm beginning to believe in God.

TILLEY:

You were never one of those

atheists, were you?

SAM:

No, I'm not saying that, but I'm

beginning to give God more thought.

TILLEY:

So, what did you do? Have some

kind of religious experience?

SAM:

I tell ya... I took my wife for

lunch yesterday... we went and

had some smorgasbord, and it

kind of happened.

TILLEY:

You found God at the smorgasbord?

SAM:

Yeah.

TILLEY:

Sam, people have religious

experiences like on a lake or

when they go up into the mountains,

that kind of thing.

SAM:

Maybe... but I had mine in a

smorgasbord.

(CONTINUED)

53.

55 CONTINUED:
(3) 55

TILLEY:

(laughs)

Sam, you're too much.

SAM:

I went to get myself a salad

and I started to see all these

vegetables, you know how they

have all those salads laid out

so that when it's time to get to

the main course you won't eat too

much... that scam to get you

filled up so you don't eat too

much chicken and beef and all

that other stuff.

TILLEY:

Yeah, yeah... I get the point.

So?

SAM:

So I see celery, I see the lettuce,

tomatoes, cauliflower... and I

think, all these things come out

of the ground... they just grow

out of the ground. They had corn

-- out of the ground... radish -out

of the ground. You say to

yourself, how can all these things

come out of the ground? You know

what I'm talking about? All these

things are out of the ground.

TILLEY:

(not understanding)

Yeah.

SAM:

I mean, how can that be? It just

happened that way? And I'm not

even getting into the fruits...

I'm just dealing with vegetables

right now. With all those things

coming out of the earth, there

must be a God.

Rate this script:4.0 / 1 vote