Top Secret!

---

Security has been tightened

throughout the country.

All borders have been placed

on full alert.

Exit visas have been suspended

for the entire week.

In addition,

we have received assurances...

from our undercover agents

in the West...

that our actions to date

have gone completely undetected.

All military leaves

have been canceled...

and we have doubled the guard

around Dr. Flammond.

And finally, all systems...

are in readiness for deployment

of the Polaris Mine.

Just as you ordered,

General Streck.

Well done, Von Horst.

By Sunday, the entire

NATO submarine fleet...

will be here on their maneuvers

and completely vulnerable.

Major Crumpler...

what is the progress

of our diversionary plan?

The schedule

for the cultural festival...

is now complete, Herr General.

And you should be pleased to note

that at your personal request...

the Soviets have agreed to send

their celebrated tenor...

Vladimir Biletnikov.

Well done, Herr Major.

Then everything has gone

according to the plan.

Well, not exactly, mein General.

The American, Leonard Bernstein,

unfortunately has had to cancel.

But they are sending

another performer in his place.

In fact, we have just received...

this copy

of his most recent record album.

His name is Nick Rivers.

I'm sure he will be quite adequate.

As long as

the attention of the world...

is firmly fixed

on our cultural festival...

no one will know

what is about to happen.

And once again, Germany will become

united under one rule... ours!

After Sunday, there will be

no one to stop us!

Skeet surfin'

If everybody had a 12-gauge

And a surfboard too

You'd see 'em shootin'and surfin'

From here to Malibu

Because it's totally bitchin'

Ridin' waves to blast the pigeons

And it's so neat shooting skeet...

While you're riding

on the heavies all day

First wave, don't get tired

Second wave, aim higher

Third wave, pull and fire

- Skeet surfin'

- It's all right

Waxin'down our surfboards

And loadin'up our traps

Tell the teacher we're shootin'

We're never comin'back

I've got a gun rack in my Chevy

For when the surf

and the flak get heavy

And we'll have fun with our guns...

Till our lifeguard

takes our ammo away

First wave, don't get tired

Second wave, aim higher

Third wave, pull and fire

- Skeet surfin'

- It's all right

First wave, get the knack

Second wave, pull the trap

Third wave, how's that

- Skeet surfin'

- It's all right

Sharing sunsets

with my favorite girl

When we shoot the curl

we really shoot the curl

First wave, don't get tired

Second wave, aim higher

Third wave, pull and fire

- Skeet surfin'

- It's all right

First wave, get the knack

Second wave, pull the trap

Third wave, how's that

I wish they all could be

double-barrel

Wish they all could be

double-barrel guns

Skeet surfin', can't you see

Do you wanna come along with me

Skeet surfin', can't you see

Do you wanna come along with me

Skeet surfin', it's all right

Little girl

we'll have fun tonight

Skeet surfin', can't you see

Do you wanna come along with me

Grab your board

and run to your gun

A pen.

A pen.

A table.

A table.

The pen is on the table.

There is sauerkraut

in my lederhosen.

Come in.

What did he say?

I think we're at

the East German checkpoint.

Better have our passports ready.

Now remember, Nick,

this is the first time...

rock music has ever been allowed

in this country.

So, you're not just a performer,

you're an ambassador...

representing America.

And above all, remember,

we've got to play by their rules.

Martin, I've been practicing.

How's this?

- What does that mean?

- Is your daughter 18?

Your papers, please.

Mr. Nick Rivers.

We've been awaiting the arrival

of the famous American singer.

Come here!

- Where are they taking him?

- They are not taking him anywhere.

Do not let your American curiosity

lead you into trouble, Mr. Rivers.

You are a guest here

only because it serves our purposes.

I suggest that during your stay...

it would be wise

to keep to your own affairs.

Good day.

- What the hell did you say to him?

- Nothing.

I just told him I put his name

on the Montgomery Ward mailing list.

I'm sorry. He's just

a little tired from the trip.

Normally, he wouldn't have said...

Your attitude is being noted,

Mr. Rivers.

If that was your idea

of being an ambassador...

we're headed for a lot of trouble.

I want a schnauzer

with my Wiener schnitzel.

Souvenirs, novelties,

party tricks.

Souvenirs, novelties,

party tricks.

Do you know any good white

basketball players?

There are no good white

basketball players, my friend.

There was trouble

on the Berlin Express.

They knew I was on that train.

We suspect there is a traitor

somewhere in the Resistance.

We must proceed, nonetheless.

There is too much at stake.

Here, kind sir,

smell this flower.

It never fails

to amuse at parties.

That's very good.

The Germans are planning something.

Time is running out.

Have you found out

where Dr. Flammond is being kept?

Here. This is one of

our most popular items.

That's very good, ja.

We do not know where

they are keeping Dr. Flammond...

only that they are forcing him

to build a new weapon.

What are my instructions?

Here. Here. Try this.

This will make you very popular

at social gatherings.

Go tonight to the ballet.

Here. Use this ticket.

You will meet

the leader of the Resistance...

a man known as "The Torch."

Until then, wait at

the Howard Johnson's.

It's on the corner of Der Fuehrer

Strasse and Goebbels Platzen.

Good luck, kind sir,

and God be with you.

Wait.

You dropped your phony dog poo.

What phony dog poo?

Souvenirs, novelties,

party tricks.

Driver, why have we stopped here?

This isn't the Howard Johnson's.

Good evening.

A table for two, please.

The name is Rivers.

Ah, yes, Mr. Rivers.

I have it right here.

But I'm afraid we require...

a jacket and tie

for the dining room.

If you like, we would be very happy

to provide you with one.

- Oh, that would be fine.

- Jurgen.

This way, sir.

Ah, General Streck,

Comrade Biletnikov.

I have your table ready for you.

Very good, Heinz.

As you know...

Comrade Biletnikov holds

a very high rank in the party.

We wish to afford him

every courtesy.

But of course, mein General.

Perhaps Comrade Biletnikov...

would be persuaded

to sing for us this evening.

I will take care of it.

Thank you.

Nick, I'm sorry I won't be able to

join you for dinner tonight.

I'm coming down with a sore throat,

so I've decided to turn in early.

Don't forget. You have to be

at the theater at 8:30.

- This doesn't help at all.

- Don't worry about it, Martin.

Go up to your room

and get some sleep.

- Is there anything you need?

- No, thanks.

I just wanted to make sure

you got those new arrangements.

Oh, yeah. I got them right here.

Oh, by the way...

I ordered that '84 Ripple Blanc

for you that they recommended.

- It's very good.

- Thanks.

Who do you favor

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