Travelling Salesman Page #3

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That's very kind of you.

And thank you, Dr. Acuri,

For that overwhelmingly kind

introduction.

I'm, um, very humbled

and honored

To be in front of you

this evening.

Um, not just because I'm a room

Full of brilliant

mathematicians,

Which, of course, I am.

But because, not too long ago,

I was, in fact,

denied admission

To this very university.

Uh, not enough extracurriculars,

I suppose.

Um...

this symposium's focus

is on the future of mathematics,

And I've been asked

to succinctly address that topic

With you here tonight.

It's difficult, of course,

to contextualize

Something so vague and broad

As the future of mathematics.

If the past is any indication

of what is yet to come,

Um, that answer

could very well be anything.

But I don't think many of you

would find that summary

Very adequate, so I will

attempt to do better.

Let's, uh, let's begin

by taking stock

Of where we are presently.

The extraordinary application

of mathematics

Has allowed us luxuries

and necessities

Such as mobile phones,

Gps navigation,

automatic dish... Dishwashers.

It's allowed us computer games,

portable televisions,

Compact disc players.

It's allowed us

high-Definition,

Organic food distribution,

Airplanes,

calculator wristwatches.

It's allowed radio control,

lasik eye surgery,

Laser brain redaction,

noninvasive arthroscopy.

It's allowed g5s, c-4,

And weapons-Grade u-235.

It's allowed artificial hearts

And heartless

artificial intelligence.

It's allowed blackberries...

I hope they're all silent...

iPhones and all the other

portable devices

That enslave us to the man,

Keep us chained

to the ever-Growing

Corporate contingency

of this world.

It's allowed facebook, MySpace,

And all the other

pervasive web apps

That enable cutthroat enablers

And expedite

the greedy infiltration

And perversion of our youth.

In short, it's allowed

the good, the bad,

And everything else.

Gentlemen,

thank you for waiting.

I'm sorry to be late.

Before I forget, would you

just pass those around?

They're from the president.

Has everyone eaten?

Everyone's well?

I think that today is

a culmination of many things,

Many emotions.

And I'm... I'm here

to say thank you and...

I guess to provide

maybe a little closure

To a process that I'm sure

has seemed quite endless.

Now, I don't want to drag

this out and make it too long,

But I've been instructed...

Well, actually,

pretty much ordered...

To make sure you guys leave here

happy and fulfilled.

How's that go?

Hall hath no fury

like a mathematician scorned?

All right, now...

it has been over a year

Since we were all

in the same room.

Does anyone have any questions

that, hopefully, I can answer?

No?

All right, well,

I've got a brief agenda

That I want to run through,

So let's just pass these

around, all right?

First item is the order

of compensation.

$10 million annuities

have been established

In each of your names.

All you need to do

is check the appropriate box

Next to the payment method.

Direct deposit?

Pardon me?

Will this be direct deposit?

However your research

stipends were paid,

This will be the same.

Does that work?

Now, including

your annual stipends,

Has anyone had any issues

at all

With their payments thus far?

I hope not.

All right, well,

your stipends will continue

For another six months

for any supplemental research

That may be needed.

But hopefully not.

And that brings your total

funding to approximately...

Well, not approximately...

To exactly $22 million

U.S. Dollars,

And the annuity will ultimately

pay out more than that.

Not bad for a few years'

research, is it?

Gentlemen, before we go

to the next item,

I want to express to you

the level of gratitude

The president and the country

Owe you.

This is no small moment

in history.

Next is the non-Disclosure

agreement.

I know we have visited

and revisited this issue

Many times over

the last few years.

It's a very critical one.

The second document reiterates

the legal ramifications

If any information

is published or broadcast

Without the dod

or NSA's consent,

Which basically means never.

I know this project itself

is classified.

Is there any intention

of ultimately releasing

The findings to the community?

We all have a lot of colleagues

Whose applied research

could benefit from this.

I mean, I'm talking about

methods to cure cancer,

Establish a causal connection

to Parkinson's, Alzheimer's...

Right, right,

we understand that,

And I want to assure you

that the government

Will be very thoughtful

to those issues.

And we'll probably take those

on a case-By-Case basis,

But for right now,

I will have to say no.

It will remain as a classified

national security asset.

I'm sorry, that's not

what we signed up for.

Well, from the outset,

I don't think anyone

could have predicted

The extent of your

accomplishments.

And with the sensitivity

of the findings,

It is in our country's

best interests

To make sure

they remain safeguarded.

So if we were

to publish anything

In, say, a trade journal...

You could be...

And, of course, it would

Depend on what was discussed...

But you could be in violation

Of the program's nda,

and as a result,

You could be arrested

for treason.

Now, your security clearances

will be terminated,

I believe within the same

six-Month time frame.

After that, you'll

no longer have access

To the communications channel

or the secured network

That you've all used

to coordinate with each other.

What?

Well, I understand that

you must give this same spiel

To any variety of...

Of, uh...

I don't really know

who you give this spiel to.

But doesn't it seem

somewhat ironic,

Given your present audience?

I'm sorry.

I don't follow you.

I think what Jim means is that,

If there were

a secured network,

Like, uh, siprnet or jwics,

that we wanted access to,

Well, um...

we'd just hack in and take it.

Well, I am sorry

to disappoint you,

But the defense system

that you just referenced

Is not part of any network

that you have access to.

Well, we're sorry

to disappoint you,

But just the fact that those

systems are on any network

Means they're vulnerable.

Where was it, doctor,

that we developed

The system

to infiltrate siprnet?

- Uh, Princeton?

- Sure, yeah.

And that was before we had

our nondeterministic process.

- Gentlemen...

- It was practically

- My doctoral thesis.

- Yes, of course.

Congratulations, gentlemen.

You have just admitted

to seven felony counts

And a level of treason

that would land you at supermax.

Lovely.

So you're saying I should

delete those secret files

Off my hard drive?

I'm saying that if you

took this process

A bit more seriously,

We could get out of here

that much sooner.

I just want to remind you, sir,

That this is not

your typical sewing circle.

Now, that's all I had

as far as an agenda.

Before I take my leave,

does anyone have any more

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