Tremors: A Cold Day in Hell Page #3

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I'm Val and Rhonda's daughter.

No! Val and Rhonda from

the OG Graboid apocalypse?

Crazy, huh?

You must be Travis.

I am.

Uh... I kind of lost track

of your parents over the years.

It's okay. They're easy

to lose track of, especially Val.

Let's get you back to the station.

Everybody's waiting.

He's not

the keeping-in-touch type.

Come on.

Ah, bam!

Dang!

Aw, man!

(GRUNTS)

(PANTING)

I see you've come up north

loaded for bear, Mr. Burt.

Yeah, BSA .303. Nice.

It'll kill most varmints.

Yeah, well, for the varmints

we're hunting,

that's like shooting

a slingshot at a Sherman tank.

I thought it'd be colder than a

reindeer's ball bag up here.

We're in the middle

of an Arctic heat wave,

which has greatly accelerated

the snow melt.

Hell, I'm hotter

than a 50 cal on full auto!

Mr. Gummer,

glad you could make it.

Welcome to the Bote Canyon

Arctic Research Station

or, like we used to call it,

science at the edge of the world.

You must be, uh,

Dr. Rita Sims?

- Good to meet you.

- Yeah.

This is Dr. Ferezze.

- Charles Ferezze.

- Doc.

How was your flight in?

Well, let's just say, uh,

we hit some chop.

We blew the engine.

Actually, we came

under Ass Blaster attack,

and during the ensuing

aerial dogfight, the engine was blown.

- An Ass Blaster?

- Yeah.

Blew the engine?

But you have to fly me

back to Montreal so I can report

to the powers that be about

the recent turn of events.

Well, they'll just have to wait till

I get this puppy airborne again.

I can't stay here

one more minute!

Excuse me. I've got

an engine to fix.

DR. FEREZZE:
Excuse me.

(LAUGHS)

Dr. Ferezze, he startles

at the drop of a feather.

I'm sorry.

We haven't met yet.

BURT:
Oh, Travis Welker,

my, uh...

My wing, uh...

Wingman.

Thank you for coming.

I've got to go inside,

get the lay of the land.

Sunset at 3:
48 a.m.

Well, it's the Land of

the Midnight Sun, Mr. Welker.

Are you saying that the sun

is never going down on me?

Well, it's never gonna go

below the horizon,

if that's what you're asking.

RITA:
We sent a three-man

drill team to the glacial field

about a half a day

up mountain from here.

You have three KIA?

Killed in action.

Whoa, that's a big

10-4, good buddy.

- Name's Swackhamer.

- Swackhamer.

I hammered-and-nailed

this place together.

You need to know anything,

I'm your guy.

There's two that we can

verify dead, one assumed dead.

Verified? How?

Well, from the kill site.

Rita and her crew managed

to recover a severed head,

a partially eaten pelvis,

and a half-eaten testicle.

How do you recover

a half-eaten testicle?

Now, where's all

the snow, Dr. Sims?

This year in particular has been one

of the warmest on record up here.

Meet Hart Hansen, Mr. Gummer.

He's a PhD in Geomorphology

from the University of Cambridge.

Ah, yeah, airplane boy.

It's an RC. Kind of a hobby.

It's actually a habit, um...

Okay, it's an addiction. Anyway,

it's a pleasure to meet you,

Mr. Gummer.

I'm sure you'll find

that Bote Canyon

is a very unique

geological phenomenon.

VALERIE:
This perennially

frozen tundra is interrupted

for approximately

10 square kilometers by thawed soil.

Thawed?

It's bone dry out there.

The Meltwater Hot Springs

are a pleasant symptom

of geothermal heat, which warms

the Earth from deep beneath the land

that we're standing on.

That explains the ABs.

Ass Blasters!

(ALL LAUGHING)

- Ass Blasters...

- You think this is funny?

These creatures are no joke.

They are all-go, no-quit killing machines.

Now, I'm sorry for the loss

of your friends,

but if you don't do exactly

as I say,

they won't be the last

to die around here.

Not funny, Mr. Gummer.

We get it.

The permafrost at a higher

elevation is melting,

so the tundra is more easily breached.

Ergo, Graboids.

You're telling me melting ice caps

and warmer temperatures

are causing this, uh,

Graboid Arctic stampede?

Kind of, but there's more.

(SCOFFS) Enlighten me.

Why here?

Evolution, Mr. Gummer.

There's one thing

Nature has taught us,

and that's life can expand

into new territories.

Maybe these are

the first Graboids.

- Yeah, like pre-Precambrian.

- VALERIE:
Exactly.

And maybe they migrated south millions,

maybe even billions of years ago

and evolved into a desert creature.

And now, after countless

giga-annum lying dormant in ice...

They've awakened.

(SIGHS) Come on, this sounds

like a bunch of sassafras!

It does sound sassafrassy!

Dr. Sims, a word?

(WHIRRING)

How much longer?

(WHIRRING STOPS)

I've got to cold-stitch the intake

manifold, rebuild the carb.

Look, if you don't get

this clunker in the air soon, I'll...

You'll what, Mr. Freeze?

Ferezze. Dr. Charles Ferezze.

What is it?

DARPA.

(WHISPERS)

What are they doing here?

(VEHICLE APPROACHING)

- Oh, them?

- Shh!

Yes, them.

What's your association

with them?

They're our

research neighbors.

Why are we whispering?

They can't hear us.

When did they arrive?

They arrived a couple

of months ago.

They're working on some

US-Canadian project.

It's very hush-hush.

(CHUCKLES)

Why? What?

Bio-weapons is what.

I'll bet you a dollar

to a donut hole we've zeroed in

on DARPA's testing ground.

You think that

our research neighbors

are breeding these creatures

as bio-weapons?

Bingo! This is

the killing ground,

and you're the guinea pigs.

I think you're reaching.

It's a verifiable fact that

DARPA started training dolphins

as bomb-carriers

during Vietnam.

More lately, they've been outed

for weaponizing cyborg insects.

No, ma'am, I wouldn't put anything

past these black-hat Mengeles.

We got Ass Blasters on campus!

Dr. Ferezze is out there

with that thing.

Oh, Lord. That guy's

turned into a real ass-ache.

What's the 20 on that AB?

(THUDS ON ROOF)

That flaming sphincter

is on the roof!

(CREATURE ROARS)

Eyes! We need

eyes on that roof!

I'm bringing up

the roof cam!

(THUDDING)

(STATIC)

All right, listen up!

If there are Ass Blasters on station,

Graboids aren't far behind.

They respond to seismic vibrations,

so everyone stay still.

Dr. Ferezze. Just the man

I wanted to see.

The bodies, or what's left of them,

are ready for transport.

When you have a minute,

we need to go through the details again.

We've been through it.

It was an apparent Graboid attack.

Graboid?

(SCREECHES)

(GROANING)

(WHIMPERING)

(SCREAMING)

(CREATURE SCREECHING)

Locked and loaded.

(C*CKS GUN)

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

(CREATURE SCREECHES)

(CREATURE SCREECHES)

(WHIMPERING)

(CREATURE SCREECHING)

(STATIC)

That thing just took down

our comms tower.

We've got no talk.

(DEVICES BEEPING)

Our data-link

and NetCam are down, too.

BURT:
How'd that

ass-wipe get out there?

Now I've got to save his sorry butt!

I'm going outside.

(WHIMPERING)

(SCREECHING)

(WHISPERS) You ever seen

an Ass Blaster before?

- Nope.

- Yeah.

This is a first.

They're pretty cool, actually,

but they're mean, and they stink.

I had a boyfriend like that once.

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