Triage Page #4

while you'll still be lying here

unable to walk.

The point being, I suppose,

that stupidity can take

a variety of forms.

Have you ever been

in a war zone, doctor?

No. But I've treated patients

who have.

All right. Well, no offense,

but I don't think it's the same thing.

No, it's not the same thing.

But does that mean

we can only understand

what we directly experience?

Can only someone who's been raped

counsel a rape victim?

Maybe.

I didn't know

Mark had been published.

Do you think you can help him?

Yes, of course I can help him.

I can help anyone.

Like I said last night, it doesn't

change anything between us.

I only asked you here to help him.

How did you become so hard, Elena?

So judgmental?

Is it always wrong

to be judgmental?

About the Nazis

or what Stalin did?

About what you did?

Oh? And just what is it

that you think that I did?

No, no. I'm... I'm sorry.

No, I do want to go into this.

This is something you have

always denied me.

You have learned about what I did,

and that was enough,

you made up your own mind.

But you never once

came to ask me.

You are the only thing

in the world for me, Elena.

So, tell me, what it is

that you think I did there?

Your patients were war criminals.

Monsters.

Men who destroyed villages

and tortured people to death,

all in the name of Spain, of Franco.

And when they came to you,

you absolved them of all guilt.

You purified them.

Yeah, you came up

with that phrase, didn't you?

You must have.

"The Morales Institute

for Psychological Purification."

Thousands of innocent people

murdered,

and whenever their killers

felt pangs of guilt,

they went to you,

and you told them,

"Don't worry about it,

you had no choice.

Get on with your life."

Those men,

when they were brought to me,

those "monsters" as you call them,

they were lost.

So as a last hope,

they brought them to me,

and yes, I purified them.

To you, it is simple.

They were evil men,

and because I treated them,

I am evil, too. Hmm?

But you forget something.

These were the men who had won.

They held the fate of Spain

in their hands,

and they had tasted power.

And what is the greatest power

that a man can have?

It is to kill.

And if you have killed a thousand,

what are a thousand more?

If you have tortured one person,

is it too hard to torture another?

No.

It's easy. It's the easiest thing

in the world.

This is what our country

was faced with.

So what was I to do?

Was I to leave these killers

as they were

so they could go on killing?

No, I could not agree to that.

So, I purified them.

I brought them back to life,

and to humanity.

How many people did I save?

I think I saved many.

So there you have it.

Do with it what you will.

But you are no longer a teenager.

The world is a very complex place.

There is very little of it

that is black and white.

Ah, so you're awake then.

How do you feel?

I'm fine.

Marvelous.

What time is it?

Time to get started.

Beyond that, who can say?

Elena yesterday telephoned me

and told me

about all your difficulties

and asked if I could help.

I said, "Well."

I was rather hesitant at first,

because I've been retired

from the field for many years, but...

Sorry, but you mentioned Elena?

I am Joaquin Morales,

Elena's grandfather.

Carmen, her mother,

is always telling me

about your adventures.

And now we finally meet,

and, uh, it's a pity

it's in these... circumstances.

I imagine you've heard

a great deal about me.

Well, she said she stopped

talking to you a number of years ago

because she heard

you were a fascist.

A fascist!

[Laughs]

She's a very inventive girl.

Por Dios, all this talk is just

torturing me from reason I came.

I would like to make

a brief patient history of you,

if that's all right with you.

Sure, I've no choice.

- Age?

- 34.

Parents still alive?

[Yawning]

Father passed away

and mother lives in London.

- Brothers and sisters?

- Nope.

Hmm.

Well, then, let's get started.

- That's it?

- I beg your pardon?

I thought psychiatrists

were supposed to ask you

all sorts of questions

about your childhood experiences

and relationships and all that stuff.

Unnecessary. Exotic.

You're not actually a psychiatrist,

are you?

Well, I like to think of myself

as a...

a scholar of the human spirit.

Ah, that's lovely.

Tell me a war story.

- What?

- A war story.

You must have many,

but the first one

that comes to your mind.

It's a bit early

in the f***ing day for that.

You're serious.

I don't even know

if his family got the body back.

Why do you think

this incident affected you?

I dunno.

Maybe I felt responsible.

Well, perhaps if you hadn't

been there, he wouldn't have run.

The soldiers

would not have fired, hmm?

I suppose so.

Well, that makes perfect sense.

You feel that you're responsible

because to a great degree you are.

You think I'm too harsh?

How many people

have you told this story to, Mark?

Four? Three? Two? Twenty?

And what do they say?

"Oh, you mustn't blame yourself."

"Oh, no, it was not your fault."

"Oh, no, there was nothing

you could do." Am I correct?

You have looked to others

for forgiveness,

but, as you have discovered,

this is something

they cannot give you.

We cannot let go of the pain.

We have to carry it with us forever.

That is what it means to live.

Now, I can help you

to live with this pain.

Look at me.

I am 86 years old.

I lost my entire family.

I lost my parents,

I lost my brothers and sisters,

and I lost my wife.

And yet, I am still here.

I can still smile,

and the world is still...

a wonderful place.

Elena will probably be here

before long.

So you tell her I'm in the hotel.

Oh, by the way, you know

you sleep very peacefully.

There's not a movement,

not a wrinkle in your face.

Just like a baby.

That's a good thing, isn't it?

No.

If you were thrashing about

and muttering to yourself,

it would mean the problem

is close by.

But peacefulness?

In a grown man,

that is not a good sign.

Thank you.

- I'll see you at home.

- Sure.

Excellent.

You're almost back to normal.

I'm not. I'm moving

with less grace than you.

[Laughs]

Splendid.

A sense of humor is always

one of the last abilities to return.

That was the office.

A Red Cross team in Kurdistan

just found David's things

in a hotel room in Rawa...

Rawanduz.

Yeah.

It's a town in the north.

- It was our base.

- In the north?

But I thought you told me

he went south.

I don't know. He was...

He was heading south, and I was

supposed to go back to Rawanduz,

but I just headed straight for Turkey

when I had a chance, you know?

Everything's still there.

His clothes, everything.

Okay. What do we do?

Is there anyone there

we can contact?

I don't know.

Think, Mark!

There must be someone!

I don't know!

This is not very helpful.

Not right now.

What am I supposed

to tell Diane, huh?

My God, what do I tell her?

I have to get over there.

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