Trouble in Store

Give over! Ah!

You'II... you'll pay for that!

- One of these days I'II...

- (Horn)

- Shut up! Don't be impatient!

- Move!

You have more of the road!

Far as I'm...

- Oh!

- Get off the road!

Clumsy elephant!

Look where you're going!

I'm sorry, Mr Dawson.

Calls himself a detective!

He couldn't detect Nelson's Column!

He had a nerve, didn't he?

I said, "If you think for a box of

chocolates you can take liberties,

"you've got another thought coming."

- See you at lunchtime.

- Bye.

- Morning, Taffy.

- Good morning, Miss Sally.

Hey! Hey! Stop! Stop! Stop!

I got your number, JBH 025.

I got it! Oh, look!

(Frustrated shriek)

Look what you've done! Hey!

I got your...

Oi! I got your number too. LHD R45.

Buddy, look what... Hey!

I got your number too. JBH 808, 05...

JB8... J... H0...

Go away!

- Good morning, Mabel. Am I late?

- I'm early.

Isn't it a smashing day?

Oh, yes, lovely.

Makes you feel good to be alive.

I wish I was dead.

- Now what's the matter?

- Well...

I was here, she was there.

I could've reached out and touched her.

Like that. She didn't even notice me.

I don't wonder.

Look at us. Look at our collar,

look at our tie. What a mess!

Oh, it's no use, Gibby.

You can't help me.

Oh! That bike!

Oh, excuse me, Officer.

This is Burridges store, isn't it?

- Yes, madam.

- Thank you.

- Oh, good day, my man.

- Morning, madam.

It is rather large, isn't it?

- Could you direct me to suitcases?

- First on the right.

Thank you.

- Get my personnel manager.

- 'Yes, Mr Freeman.'

Thank you.

- (Knocking)

- Come in.

- Good morning, Mr Freeman.

- Good morning.

Put it down there.

I am Miss Drew.

- Your personnel manager.

- How nice for them.

Just a little custom at Burridges, chief.

Delightful, really delightful.

What orders, Mr Freeman?

I fancy my methods will be different

from my predecessor, Miss Drew.

Yes, indeed.

My first step will be

to review my troops, so to speak.

- Shall I call the department heads?

- No.

I'd like first of all to meet the humblest

member of the staff at Burridges.

He's a partner in this enterprise

just the same as we are.

- Our most lowly partner, if you please.

- I know just the person.

- Excuse me.

- It's a pleasure.

Hello, stockroom, please.

I'd like the whole staff

to regard me as a father, so to speak.

- Yes, a father.

- But of course.

Well, not exactly a father.

- Hello?

- Stockroom.

Yes? Yes, Miss Drew. Yes...

(Squeaking)

Norman!

The chief wants you

in his office right away.

Chief? Me? Oh, no, I couldn't.

But an interview with the chief

might lead to anything.

Promotion! That's it! I knew it!

She'll notice me when

I'm a window-dresser!

Yes, but hurry up.

Don't keep him waiting.

Norman!

- Your coat!

- Thought I'd forgotten it, didn't you?

Banana brain.

Excuse me, could you direct me

to the millinery department?

- Certainly. Straight ahead on your left.

- Thank you.

- (Knocking)

- Come in.

- Good morning.

- Morning.

- Where is he?

- Haven't we met?

Oh, that's possible. I'm all over the place.

Hey! They're the governor's!

Well, if you're gonna have one,

I might as well have one too.

One minute!

Put a couple in your pocket.

Go on! It's OK. There you are.

I'll have a couple as well.

Here, have a look out the window. Go on.

Chief's a bit late these days.

- All right?

- Uh-huh.

Let's have a drink then, eh?

Now, what are you gonna have?

- Could you spare a whiskey and soda?

- Course, there's bags here.

Come on.

Ah, ah, ah, ah.

- There you are.

- Thank you. And what about you?

None of that stuff.

Lemonade for me. Now keep looking.

Here we are. Come on.

Your very good health, sir.

Sit down.

No, not there. That's the governor's seat.

I'm gonna sit there.

Now...

how do I look?

(Telephone)

Ah, ah.

Hello?

Well, of course this is Burridges.

Is it Burri!

The order for 5,000

linen dresses? Yeah.

All brown? 5,000 of 'em?

Don't want brown, do we?

Dirty colour. Make 'em pink, eh?

5,000 all pink. That's it.

(Posh accent) Oh, and thank you too.

I'd like to see the chief's face

when 5,000 pink dresses turn up!

(Telephone)

I said pink!

Oh. Who?

Freeman? Not here.

No, I've never heard of him.

No! I don't care

if you are a cabinet minister.

Oh, shove off! Go on!

Here, you have a turn. Come on!

Sit down. Never get

another chance, you know.

Do you know who I am?

I am Augustus Freeman.

Oh, I'm Norman, stockroom.

I'm getting promoted. Chief sent for me.

I am the new chief!

You get your promotion

quicker than I do.

- Dress buyer? Freeman speaking.

- What?

- Your order for 5,000 dresses, pink.

- Go on!

Cancel them!

- Cancel!

- (Telephone)

- Yeah, that order, it's on again.

- (Phones all ringing)

Cancel those dresses.

Freeman speaking.

Put the order on again. Yeah, make it...

Will you please cancel those

5,000 dresses, pink? Freeman speaking!

Make it 10,000!

No, no, 5,000!

No, for heaven's sake!

Cancel them altogether, please.

- We'll have all you got left!

- We won't! Cancel them all!

Oh! (Laughing)

I hit me head on...

Cancel them...

Miss Drew, please come in.

Oh, no, don't start again, don't start...

Miss Drew, tell this person who I am.

Oh, Mr Freeman.

We've met, haven't we?

He gave me the stomachache.

Tell him my rank.

You're the new chief!

Chief!

New chief?

Yes, Norman!

The new chief of Burridges,

a store which no longer requires

your services.

- You mean?

- I mean you're fired. Get out!

Will you get out? Get out this instant!

(Miss Drew) Norman,

take a week's notice.

He wouldn't have sacked me.

He could take a joke.

Get out, will you?!

There, Mr Freeman.

Don't upset yourself. It'll be OK.

(Liftboy) Children's Wild West Saloon,

toys, gramophones,

bicycles, sports goods, men's hats.

(Children chattering)

Gimme a stiff... grapefruit.

(Woman) # I'd like to put on record

that I need you, need you, need you

# So won't you, won't you try to see

# That every time the record says

I love you, love you, love you

# Won't you please love me?

# I'd like to put on record

that I love you, love you, love you

# I want the whole wide world

to know it's true

# I'd like to state forever,

that never, never, never

# Will there ever be another boy like you

# I'd like to put on record

that I need you, need you, need you

# So won't you, won't you try to see

# That every time the record says

I love you, love you, love you

# Won't you please love me? #

Would anybody like to record

their own love song?

You can send a message to your wife

or your mother or your sweetheart. No?

How about you, sir?

I'm sure you have a message.

No, thanks.

Come along, sir, then you.

Don't be shy.

Here are the words.

I'll sing the first verse with you.

Now, don't be shy, sir.

There's a whole band playing with you.

Now, who's it to?

My darling wife or mother or Jane, Jill...

Don't ask me,

I come to tell you about the bike.

Now, come along, sir, she must have

a name. What do you call her?

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