Trouble Is My Business Page #3

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No.

Busy man.

Where's that one?

I saw the state you were in.

A needle mark in your arm,

I got a tip for you buddy.

I can't cover for

you the way I did

with the missing girl.

And, I think someone's onto you.

You didn't need

to cover for me.

That was the whole problem.

Just trying to help.

Need any help now?

Just a $1.47.

Plus the tip?

All in the details.

Perhaps that's why

Jennifer Montemar hired you.

You're a detail man.

(dramatic music)

Any change, mister?

I wish.

(dramatic music)

That was the first time

I knew you were

really onto me, Lew.

So I figured the Orlov diamond

was my best chance

at finding Katherine.

Knowing her missing uncle

was a jeweler of course,

you did the usual.

(dramatic music)

I checked every

jewelry dealer in town

even the ones that

didn't have a store,

nothing, not even

a missing jeweler.

(glass shattering)

That bothered me,

and I bothered them.

And, they made not

secret about it.

And, you right at my

heels, well you always knew

how I felt about that.

My life might have

been a slow drip,

but I was definitely bleeding.

And, two Montemars

walk into my office.

Katherine made me

feel alive again,

but Jennifer made me

want to stay that way.

(dramatic music)

I arrived for dinner

at the Montemar house

thinking maybe I could find out

what a respectable,

normal family looked like.

'Cause in my line,

I'd never met one.

(doorbell ringing)

I'm...

Roland Drake, a

private investigator

of Miss Jennifer's acquaintance

who is indeed expected.

Anything else?

Yes, I can't say I care

very much for your shoes.

Please come in.

(clock striking the time)

[Woman] Rivers,

there's no longer steam

coming off of my tea!

(dramatic music)

Mr. Drake, thank you

so much for coming.

Miss Montemar.

Hey baby, who's the rube?

Mr. Roland Drake,

please meet John Shannon.

Mr. Drake has agreed to help me.

Roland, I want to

thank you so much

for helping my girl out.

You know I just gotta

say thanks for just going

out of your way for her.

Yeah well not that

helping her doesn't have

its own benefits,

but it is my job.

What's your job?

Oh I'm her fella.

You're a working guy.

I like helping out.

I help her in, I help her

out of things for free.

But, I got other hobbies.

(laughing)

You want a bell pally?

You mean a drink

or an opportunity?

Both are my bag, right baby?

Dinner's being served.

Johnny, please do try not

to upset mother tonight.

I'm pretty sure the

tin start might upset her

just a little more, huh.

And, I'm sorry if Johnny

appears rude, Mr. Drake.

He really can be very sweet.

Can't you, lover?

For you.

Yeah, all right, see youse.

I had an ex secretary

who was real sweet.

Was she?

Yeah, she made

me feel real good,

and when I gave her

dictation, she made me feel

real smart.

Oh you can be a

heel, huh Mr. Drake?

I can be.

Well you don't have

to make a pose of it.

It's the only

pose I have left.

I am gonna have to ask

your fella some questions.

Of course, Johnny would

be more than happy to help

any way he can.

Oh I got that the first time.

And, I will have to ask

your mother some questions.

Well maybe not

too many questions.

Really why?

(giggling)

You'll understand.

Miss Evelyn Montemar, I

present a Mr. Roland Drake,

a private investigator of

Miss Jennifer's acquaintance.

Please don't stand.

I never do.

Where's my first born

isn't Katherine joining us?

There hasn't been word, madam.

Well just us tonight.

Katherine was quite

a dish, Mr. Drake.

You know you might even

have a shot with her.

Did you?

No, but I got a

thing for brunettes.

(laughing)

Charming.

Evelyn quite the

spread tonight I must say

like mother like daughter.

You're not funny.

No one thinks you're funny.

(dramatic music)

Is there anything

else I can do?

You do enough.

He's been my strength since

your father disappeared

last week.

Sweet man.

Private investigator, hey?

Aren't you good enough

to be a police detective?

(Johnny laughing)

Mother.

No, my shoes squeak

too much ask Rivers.

I don't like a man

with a sense of humor.

I find it almost as unattractive

as a woman with one.

Depends on what

she's laughing at.

I rarely laughed before my

accident, and less so now.

Although I do find it

amusing that Jennifer

has brought you into our

family business, why?

I would like to

help your daughter.

For a fee, I'm sure.

Well even a shamus gotta eat.

Thank you.

Jennifer doesn't have

her own money, Mr. Drake.

So you must be working for me.

Yeah we like hard workers

around here, Mr. Drake.

Yet, you're here

too Johnathan.

Touche.

I told Jennifer about

the newspaper stories

of your disgraceful

behavior, Mr. Drake.

[Roland] Wait till

you see how I eat.

Mother, please

you're being rude.

I have a certain morbid

fascination with failing.

So it was difficult to mask

my delight at meeting you.

You probably noticed.

No, as you and your

daughter keep pointing out,

I'm not that good a detective.

I'm not surprised that Jennifer

sought you out, Mr. Drake.

I'm sure you're the only

detective she could recollect

from my opinions of

your failings regarding

that poor girl.

Katherine is the

reader in this family.

Just because you read

accusations in the newspaper,

doesn't make 'em true.

Yeah, didn't they say that

you were the best, Mr. Drake?

My partner Lew would

agree with you, Johnny.

Smart man.

Lew MacDonald's integrity

seems quite unassailable.

Frankly I'm not surprised

he left your partnership.

He cuts quite a fine

figure of a man in print.

Lew's always been

uncompromising when it comes

to appearances.

(giggling)

Well you seem a

little more flexible.

I was down on my luck, Johnny.

Why don't you take up reading,

find out what's going on?

Sadly, the only thing

these two ever seem to read

are the funny papers

and the obituaries.

Mother, I invited

Mr. Drake here tonight

because I believe that

he can do more for us

than the police are doing.

Wouldn't it make more

sense for you to take

whatever you find to the

police instead of here to us?

No more sense than

slitting my own throat

to get some fresh air.

I do wish Katherine were here.

She would know what to do.

I've often thought

that Katherine took

all the refinement

from my womb and left

precious little for out

fascinating Jennifer.

Evelyn, Jennifer

brought me here,

and I'm willing to do

what's necessary to help.

Seems you've done

more than necessary

as far as the police

were concerned.

Perhaps, without

you that poor girl

would still be alive.

The girl's family

contacted me when the police

appeared to be doing nothing.

I found the girl, and I said so.

She died.

The DA and the police

made it easy to hate me

and hard for me to stay

out of a permanent address

with three squares and a cot.

The police are doing

everything they can for us.

(crying)

(dramatic music)

I am beside myself

without my Wilson.

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