Ucho

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THE EAR:

BASED ON AN ORIGINAL STORY

BY JAN PROCHAZKA

- Put your shoes on

- Leave me alone, will you

You can't leave me here

without my hat

Goodbye

- Give me the keys

- Go to hell

You locked up,

I was already in the car

That's your bad upbringing -

leaving before me

Nothing to be proud of

They're not here

I know what I'm doing,

I haven't gone mad yet

I'm sure you put them in your bag

Are you mad?

There are people about

You mean that car parked over there?

Who would be sitting in a car

with the headlights off?

Do you think there was

a bit of hanky-panky going on there?

Number 117

- And we all fall down

- Enjoy yourselves

None of your usual

"don't drink" rubbish

You can't boss me around all evening

Keep your voice down.

You don't have to talk to me at all

Look what I pinched at the party

- Where the hell are those keys?

- How should I know?

Just for once, can't you cut it out?

At least for tonight

If you've got time

have a look at the calendar

Why should I?

Maybe you'll realise

what day it is today

I mean,

for such a clever guy

They're not here

so, do something,

we can't stay here all night

We can ring the bell, can't we?

It's not working.

I've got to pee, or I'II...

- I don't give a damn

- No need to remind me

I've known for a long time

how little you care for me

I'm not that stupid

How could you talk to Cejnar

all evening?

You keep saying that he's a moron

Leaving me standing around

like unattended luggage

I'm looking for Anna

Wake Ludek up.

The spare keys are in the kitchen

Now break a window

We're all idiots,

but you are the genius

Try the laundry room window

He's out like a light

Why did you climb over the gate?

It was open

Can't you get rid

of that stupid thing?

So you noticed me

- What was open?

- I've forgotten what it's called

something you go through

to get to the garden

Rubbish

I haven't heard that from you

for ages

I knew I was missing something

How else could I have got here?

Over the fence?

In this dress?

Use your loaf!

Klepac came back from Moscow

two days ago

The blinds have been down

the whole time till today

There was still no sign of them,

even today

At least when he comes back

the missus knows she'll be catered for

Don't pull the washing line!

Blast it!

They gave us a wonderful reception

in Brno...

- In Bratislava... Kosic...

- Kosice

They gave us

a wonderful reception there

When it's cold,

comrade deputy minister...

...when it's minus 20 or 30 degrees

can you lay concrete?

He's asking if we can lay concrete

when it's very cold

I understand

What a nation.

Wouldn't let a soldier take a break!

- We can't lay concrete when it's so cold

- Dreadful

And the civic leader of Plzen...

Plzen - beer!

We can lay concrete in heavy frost.

You must come and see

- Where were you born?

- In Mohelnice

It's a town in a province called Kana

- Mohelnice is a village, isn't it?

- It's a town!

You must come. You must

You don't have a minister

for construction right now?

Of course, we have one.

Comrade Kosara is our minister

our comrades told me

you don't have a minister right now

- He should be around somewhere

- He excused himself

He excused himself?

Allow me to make a toast

soldiers and Czechs alike,

present arms!

He's blown the fuse again!

I'd be interested to see

if you tell him off!

Did he tell you

what he did to the radio?

Yeah

When? When was the last time

you saw him?

A week ago

If someone's spoiling him,

it's you

Rascal!

What a bloody mess!

They'd have to be hanging here

for me to find them

Is it going to take you all night?

How should I know

where the keys are?

- They're hanging on the hook

- Crap

- Where else could they be?

- I have no idea

How come it's unlocked?

A moment ago it was still locked

Like the gate!

Can't you even tie

your own shoelaces?

What were you up to?

I thought you were fixing the fuse

It's not the fuse, it's a power cut

But I saw you locking up

And the key is inside

When we go out

he always gets up to mischief

I told you, his mates

are always over

They've probably been mucking around

in the house

He wouldn't have left the key in the lock

He would have hung it up

so we couldn't find it

so it must have been the Holy Ghost

Ask him in the morning.

He might tell you what he was up to

He's due a good thrashing

Don't drink vodka from the bottle!

- You know who does that, don't you?

- Yes

Can't you use a glass?

I'm a publican's daughter, my boy!

You should have got used to it by now

our comrade President

also drinks from the bottle

sorry, the comrades don't sleep,

they are listening!

The meat will be off by morning

These are my keys!

Your keys were hanging

in the kitchen!

I locked up with mine

I'll give him one

for bringing his mates here

shall I put the meat

on the window sill?

It's warm outside

Take it down to the cellar

and put it on the floor

It's still cold

They must have only turned off

the power a little while ago

Look, the lights are on at the Klepac's!

How could they have turned off

only our electricity?

It could be the fuse outside

Where's the torch?

Can't you ever keep anything

in its place?

I've got everything in place

But I'm not sure you have

It's about time I brought a little light

into your life!

Drink up, my son, down it in one...

They know how to put it away

What did you discuss

at the cabinet meeting?

- Did you go through our report?

- You're not drinking?

Our people are growing in strength!

It's all the same

whether they're Catholic or Muslim

All that counts is

whether they accept socialist goals

Isn't that true, comrade minister?

I went to see Marecek at the factory

He had a picture of the Virgin Mary

on his machine

Next to his best worker's flag

The Party chairman says

he doesn't know what to do with him

"Be broad-minded", I said

Did we win the revolution or not?

As long as a person accepts

our socialist goals...

Let him pray

if he thinks it's good for him

But we don't have to write

about that in the papers

We're not going to be

heavy-handed about it

I'm glad you're of the same opinion

But it's only Tuesday

Government sessions

are on Thursdays

But they summoned Kosara

They phoned to tell him

to come straight away

I don't like standing near the...

Don't you know what happened

to Kosara?

- What's up with Kosara?

- Didn't they speak to you?

Who?

Excuse me, I have to speak

to the Parliament leader

see how he serves the food?

None of them is a trained waiter,

they're all spies!

Give me a bit of salmon

It's that red stuff over there

They took him in!

And Tondl, Klepac and Slesinger too!

But why Kosara?

Because his real name is Karpeles

He was scared

to do anything on his own

We had to force him to sign

that brickworks report!

I'd keep that to myself

if I were you

Make sure you get rid

of all the papers

You might get your fingers burnt

- But why me?

- Just in case

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