Unexpected

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1

- Hey, Sam.

- Yeah.

- Have a good day. Love you.

- You too.

It is the morning shift here

at WKEZ Chicago.

Go on in. You're gonna be late.

Morning, Fernando.

Good morning.

Hey. Hi.

Pass up your papers.

Want to talk about this worksheet

before you leave for the pep rally.

Ms. Abbott, we want to talk

about the school closing.

Yeah, what you gonna do, Ms. Abbott?

You gonna transfer to Mitchell?

I don't know. With the school closing,

all of us teachers have

to look for new positions,

but I'm sure you guys will give me

good recommendations, right?

I want to talk about prom.

I want to talk about graduation, 'cause

I'm ready to get the hell up out of here.

Okay, good. Great.

Yes, we all want to graduate. Right?

So this semester, I really want you guys

to focus on what you're gonna do

- after you graduate, okay?

- I'ma play ball.

Jamal, you don't even play ball now.

I'ma go to college, though.

I'ma get my degree,

and I'ma travel all around the world,

and if I like you,

I'ma send you a postcard.

Yes, Jasmine is right, you guys.

We should all be wanting to go to college.

Every single one of us, okay?

- Hi, do you sell pregnancy tests?

- What?

Pregnancy tests?

You girls are supposed to be

at the pep rally, okay? Let's go.

Come on.

F***.

- Hello.

- Hey, you're home late.

Yeah, I had Cliff's thing, remember?

Retirement party?

Anyway, went to Hopleaf.

I got you some beers.

I'm putting them in the fridge.

- What you working on?

- Oh, my God.

I did... Hey.

I think I'm pregnant.

Are you okay?

I don't...

I don't... I don't know

what to do, you know? I...

I mean, we've never really, like,

talked about this before, you know?

No, yeah, I don't know.

But I don't know, you know.

I might not be.

I was looking some stuff up online,

and I guess if you have

too much potassium,

this guy on a message board said

that it can give you a false positive,

and I had... I had a banana

with my yogurt this morning, and...

I don't... I don't know.

It was really big,

and I just... I don't know what is going on

with the bananas at Trader Joe's right now.

- They're just so big, and I think that...

- Hang on, hang on. Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Just... so you took a test?

Yes.

And you are pregnant.

Oh, God, I just thought

we would deal with this later

if we got married or...

f***.

Oh, my God. I'm gonna lose my job, John.

I'm gonna lose my stupid job,

and now I'm pregnant.

Hey. Hey.

Come on. Come here.

This is not how I thought

it would happen.

F***.

Yeah.

F***.

- Hey. Want some coffee?

- Good morning.

Yeah.

- John.

- Listen...

I know this probably isn't

how you imagined it happening.

John, I don't want you to propose to me

just because I'm pregnant.

And I don't want you to say yes

just 'cause I gave you pancakes.

I want to be your husband. You know?

I want to have this baby with you.

This is what we want, right?

This is what you want?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Sam...

will you marry me?

- Yes.

- Yeah?

Yeah.

Here.

It's pretty good.

It's beautiful.

- Oh, my God.

- Yeah.

Oh, gosh, what are we gonna do?

What are we gonna do

when this baby comes, John?

The school's closing, right?

Take a couple years off.

Enjoy being a mom. I'll float us.

This is gonna be so cool.

Hey. We're gonna be a family.

Right?

- Oh, God, I love you.

- I love you.

Do you, Samantha Abbott, take John Bruzek

to be your lawfully wedded husband?

I do.

And do you, John Bruzek, take Samantha

Abbott to be your lawfully wedded wife?

I do.

Then by the power vested in me

by the state of Illinois,

I now pronounce you husband and wife.

Congratulations.

- That was so easy.

- Why do people make it so complicated?

- Now you're just my husband.

- I know, and you're my wife.

Did you notice the judge's name

was Judith?

- No way.

- We just got married by Judge Judy.

- That's great.

- We got to tell our parents.

Do we have to?

I am so excited you guys

wanted to come over for dinner.

- That looks great, Carolyn.

- Thank you, John. Give me your plates.

Actually, Mom, we had something

that we wanted to tell you.

Well, John and I...

Got engaged.

I knew it. I am so happy for you two.

Baby.

This is absolutely fabulous.

We have so much to do,

so tell me everything.

Actually, Mom, we...

we already got married.

- What did you say?

- We already got married.

Why would you do that?

Oh, my God, you're pregnant.

- How did this happen?

- Well, it was a surprise.

What will you do now?

How will you get a job next year?

We talked about it,

and I'm thinking of...

I'm staying home for a little while.

Honey, you don't want to stay at home.

Well, with the cost of child care

and my salary,

- I'd hardly be bringing anything home.

- But you have a master's degree.

When your cousin Valerie

quit her job after Max was born,

- you said it was a waste of talent.

- What? I didn't say that.

- You did say that.

- Okay, fine, Mom. I've changed my mind.

And besides, no school is gonna

hire me when I'm due in August.

Well...

I guess you two have it all figured out.

I just don't know how two people

are gonna take care of a baby.

- You don't even own a washer/dryer.

- Hey, we don't need a washer/dryer, okay?

You know, Mom, we didn't

do this to hurt your feelings.

- These are supposed to be happy things.

- But they're not happening in a happy way.

This is not want I wanted. I wanted to see you

walk down the aisle in a wedding dress,

and I wanted a big cake,

and I wanted flowers and all of it.

Then you get pregnant, Sam,

after the wedding.

Samantha, I just...

what do you want me to tell people?

Well, that wasn't so bad.

Are you kidding me? That was the worst.

I mean, she hates me,

and she hates our baby.

Okay, she doesn't hate you,

and she's gonna love our baby

probably more than we can handle.

I just wish you would have helped me out

a little bit more in there, John.

What? I said the thing

about the washer/dryer.

John.

What?

Maybe she's right. We rushed it.

- Did we rush it?

- Well, we kind of had to.

'Cause we all posing and stuff.

You about to get your ass beat, Jamal!

- She mad now.

- Hey. Guys, settle down, okay?

Guys.

Hey, I want everyone back

in their seats right now.

Somebody need to get

this b*tch out my face

'cause I'm about to pop

the f*** off right now.

- Try it. Try it.

- Hey, hey. Come on. Come on.

I need you to sit down.

- LaParis, give me the phone.

- He hit me in the face.

I don't care. You're being loud

and disrespectful. Now give me that phone.

God, I'm not up for this today.

- Ms. Abbott got a rock on her finger, damn.

- That's nice.

- You gonna get married, Ms. Abbott?

- She gonna marry Coach Harwell.

Coach Harwell is 30 years older than me.

She ain't with no Coach Harwell.

She got a boyfriend.

- We're not talking about this right now.

- You gonna change your name?

Okay, listen, guys. I got married...

which is normal.

You can still call me Ms. Abbott.

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