Untouchable Page #4

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What do the doctors say?

You know, with the recent progress,

they're gonna keep me alive until 70.

With massages and medication.

It's expensive...

but I'm a rich tetraplegic.

I would shoot myself.

Well, you can't even do that

when you're tetraplegic.

Oh sh*t. That's right.

That's tough, man.

What day are we today?

I don't know, the 8th or the 9th...

So it's official!

- What?

- You did it.

Your trial is over.

- So I'm hired?

- Of course you're hired.

- Can I count on you?

- Yeah.

Good.

Then give me the 'Faberge' egg back.

It's a gift from Alice.

She got me one each year we were

together. I have 25 of them.

They're really important to me.

I don't know, what do you...

I didn't do it.

What kind of egg is that?

Nina.

- What are you doing here?

- Hurry up, get in the car.

Put your seatbelt on.

How are you?

How is school?

Why don't you answer my texts?

I was busy.

So tell me, who did you talk to on the phone?

A cop, he wanted to talk to mom.

I faked her voice and told him

someone was going to pick him up.

Did you find my egg?

Did you find it or not?

I don't care about your stupid egg.

I didn't find it anyway.

What did you tell them?

Nothing. I had nothing to tell them.

I only had 30 grams, you know the law.

They couldn't do anything.

They kept me in custody and

eventually had to let me go.

Do you want to have a sandwich?

- I'm not getting in this car.

- Cool it.

- Let me go!

- Shut up. Who's taking you home?

Who's taking you home?

- Get lost.

- It's none of your business.

Get lost!

Her polished eyes are carved in delicate minerals,

And in this strange and symbolic nature...

'And in this strange'

'and symbolic"

- 'nature'

- How boring is that?

'Where the pure angel merges

with the antic sphynx'

I never know if 'sphynx' takes

a 'i' or a 'y'?

I'm so bored by all this.

It's a 'i'.

Do you really have to go through this bullshit?

A sphynx, daisies, angels...

Would you care for a guy telling you this?

Of course, some use a more basic method.

What's next?

What does Eleonore look like?

I don't know, I don't care.

It's intellectual. Emotional.

It comes before the physical

relationship for me.

Intellectual alright, but what

if she looks like a dog?

You'd be having an intellectual

relationship with a dog.

Very elegant.

Really.

What else.

Bravo.

How long has it been going on?

He's such a pain in the ass.

Six months.

Six months?

And you've never seen her?

She really might be ugly. Or fat.

Or even disabled.

You should add that after the poem:

'by the way, how much do you weigh'?

Write it.

Thanks a lot for your

useful advice, Driss.

Let's get back to it.

Where was I?

I think a sphynx was eating daisies,

running in the fields, doing weird stuff.

Let's see...

'strange and symbolic nature'

And in this strange and symbolic nature...

You have to call her.

- Where the pure angel merges with

the antic sphynx...

I'm telling you.

Call her.

Spot it, Driss.

I'm better at written communication.

Unbelievable.

Alright, but I'm gonna look for her

phone number, it stresses me out.

Hey!

She's from the north... that's not good.

Leave this envelope.

Never has a 'Miss France' come from the north.

They usually look like crap over there.

Give the envelope back now.

She wrote her phone number, god damn it.

It's a sign. She wants you to call her!

Please. Let it go.

She wrote her phone number, Philippe.

What do you think? It means 'Call Me'.

'I want to lick your ear lobe'.

- Of course, Philippe.

- You're not calling her, are you?

She doesn't give a sh*t about poetry.

Six f***ing months of poetry...

He's bonkers.

['Call Me. I want you. ']

- I won't talk to her.

- I'm gonna check if she has a weird accent.

Northern accent sucks..

Put down the phone!

- She wants a piece of Philippe.

- She's gonna have some.

Hello.

Nice voice, for a start.

Hello...

No.

No.

- Hello...

- Improvise, talk about daisies and sh*t...

Eleonore?

It's Philippe.

Well I...

I'm calling you because I really

wanted to hear your voice.

And so far, your 'Hello' already

fill me with joy.

Hold on. I'm gonna get her.

Stop with you complicated sentences.

- Hello.

- Eleonore. It's Philippe.

Philippe?

Igen. Szerettem volna rni

egy levelet, aztn...

I was writing you a letter.

And I thought, why not simply call her.

Don't forget to ask about her weight.

- Pardon me?

- Nothing.

I'm grieving.

I want to cry.

I'm afraid.

Lord give me peace...

Exactly, that's it!

I can't corner you.

- How great that you love 'Rimbaud'.

- Sorry.

- I was first in line.

- Eleonore.

I'm glad.

Yes, I am.

- What a big mouth... he can't be stopped.

- I'm sending you kisses.

Everyone kisses, licking ears and all.

Good. So what's up?

There's good news and less good news.

- What about the good part?

- 116 Ibs.

Unless she's three feet tall.

On the other hand...

she wants a picture.

- So?

- Come on.

Good evening.

Can I see your tickets?

- Good evening.

- It's over here.

- Perfect.

- Have a good night.

- Good night to you.

- We'll be just here if you're looking for us...

We're not going to move.

Especially him.

Wait...

What do you think women want?

I don't know.

A cute, charming, elegant man...

No kidding.

They want money. Security.

Ask this dude.

And you have all that.

I might be naive, but I still hope

I have something more than my bank account..

She spent 6 months reading your goddamn

poems. And she likes it.

She's weird, don't worry.

I'm sure she doesn't give a damn

about the chair.

That's true.

Plus guys from the north drink so much

they're all beating their ladies.

She'll see there's no risk with you.

Jerk.

That's good thinking though, right?

Yeah, whatever.

The photo is a good test.

If she sends hers back it's a good sign.

You can send a picture of you

with the chair, but not too obvious.

You don't have to send a Telethon-like picture...

Drooling and all...

Looking like sh*t.

Alright, alright.

He has a problem.

A big one.

Shush yourself.

He's a tree...

A singing tree.

In german?

Stop shushing me!

It's in german anyway.

As if it wasn't enough.

You're crazy.

Oh man.

- How long does it last?

- Four hours.

F***.

You looked damn fine in the old times.

Which one?

This one.

There's also this one...

I like it a lot.

The chair is not obvious.

But you can see something is going on,

and you look really good.

- Are we doing this?

- I don't know.

Didn't you have a blast on the phone?

I did.

Is that all?

- I had a f***ing blast.

- So?

So we're sending this goddamn picture.

That's what I'm talking about.

Let's do it!

Give me a cigarette.

Don't you ever knock?

Are you painting?

- Yes, get out!

- You're kidding me.

Ha ha, painting. Did you learn how to

read as well?

I told you to get out of here!

Or what? You'll beat me? Is that

how women are treated in your country?

You're out of your mind.

F*** off!

- I'll leave when I want.

- Right!

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