VANish Page #3

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more f***ed up than I am.

Speak for yourself.

Oh, really?

- Yeah.

- OK.

When was the last

time you got laid, pal?

Jack, don't answer that.

All right.

I got two rooms.

Shane, you're with Max.

Emma is with me.

Oh, come on.

Come on, Jack.

I'll protect her.

You like getting bit,

don't you, a**hole?

Jack, with all due respect,

I don't think it's a good idea

that I room with Max either.

I won't bite Shane, I promise.

I swear I won't.

You see what I mean?

Your friend is a

f***ing fruitcake.

Now, I'm going to

get out real slow

and then you're going

to follow me, OK?

You try to run,

I will shoot you in your face.

Let's make this quick.

I don't want anyone seeing us.

Let's go, Max.

OK.

Come on, Emma.

You know, we need to have

a serious conversation

about your idiot friend here,

compromising this whole ordeal.

You know, under

different circumstances,

I think we would have

made a hell of a couple.

I would have killed you

in your sleep.

My kind of girl.

Is exactly what I thought!

What's going on, Jack?

Are those bodies down there?

Shane, get her out

of the room now!

I don't know what

room you put her in.

What room is she in?

Room 6.

Move your ass, soldier.

OK.

That was bad ass, man.

Where did they come from?

They were just hoodlums

trying to steal the van.

I guess they thought wrong, huh?

Max, won't you do me a favor

and take a look at

Emma's purse for me?

Yeah.

Wait, you have my purse?

I mean, we took it when

you were in the house.

We figured if you were

on the rag or something

and needed a tampon.

Great.

- Uh, Jack?

- Yeah.

What the f*** am I looking for?

Her phone.

Jack?

Yeah, give that to me.

What the f***?

Why the hell are you

talking to her in Spanish?

I'm freaking out here, man.

I'm f***ing lost

and I'm exhausted.

Just relax.

We're going to find a place

off the freeway

and hide out for the night.

Well, well, well.

I guess it looks like we're going

to be shacking up after all.

Oh, yay!

I can't wait.

Emma...

Wakey wakey...

- Time to go home.

- You ain't ever getting out of this...

It's time to die.

Emma.

Why don't you

suck my cock, Emma?

I would love to.

Oh, I know you'd like to.

Wakey wakey, sunshine.

Are you OK?

Yeah.

I just had a bad dream.

I see I'm still in it.

Don't worry, Emma.

Just a few more hours with us.

We'll get you home.

You'll pass that exam,

become that great psychologist

you want to be.

I'm good, thanks.

Are we going to the drop-off?

I mean, do I need a gun, you know,

what if he brings the cops?

He isn't that kind of a guy.

He won't bring the cops.

All right.

So now what?

There's a diner

3 miles north of here

I saw coming in last night.

We'll go get us some grub there.

It's 8 a.m., Max.

What does that have

to do with anything?

Shane, you want a beer?

Here.

No, no, no, man.

I'm good.

Come on, man.

It's good for the nerves.

I got something

for that right here.

You son-of-a-b*tch.

You've been holding out

on me this whole time.

No, man. I need to be

sober and focused,

all of you do, put it out.

I'm going to have some of that.

Nope.

Dude.

Jack said no.

What the f***?!

I gave you a beer!

Sheisty motherf***er,

you know that?

Oh, Jesus, dude.

- F***.

- He just hit me with a can.

What are you going to

do about it, p*ssy?

Dick.

What is all this sh*t?

Why are all these tools

laying around?

It's dad's work van.

You knew he was a mechanic.

Could you just mind your

own business.

You know, I was thinking

last night about your culture.

Your men,

they got too much pride

mixed with too much poverty,

which makes them

overly aggressive.

Your women,

they're just skanks

with high sex drives,

makes them uncontrollable.

And on top of that,

you guys are all under the

conservative hypocrisy

which is the Catholic church.

That's a recipe for violence.

I mean, look no further than

your home country of Mexico.

How's that for a

psychoanalysis, huh?

And I'm sure America's

addiction to illegal drugs

has nothing to do with

the problems in Mexico.

Now, don't look at me like that.

I got a... I got a card for this.

It's perfectly legal.

Oh, well, one of your children

just put a bullet

in my head already.

- F***.

- F***, man.

- F***, f***.

- F***, dude, it's the cops.

Dude, do you think they

know about the kidnapping?

Do you think they know

about the f***ing guns?

Do you think they know

about the... the hotel?

Do you think they

recognized her?

Can they even see her?

Can they see in here?

Shut the f*** up, Shane.

My, my, what a predicament

you boys have yourselves in.

Max, hide the beers.

I mean, who gives a sh*t, man.

The whole f***ing van

smells like pot and alcohol.

Just do it!

She's got perfume.

Spray it all over

the van, please.

OK, Jesus,

not in my f***ing face.

Oh, f***, man.

All right, everybody,

I'm pulling over.

Remain calm.

I'll do the talking.

Emma, you see this?

You give that pig so much

as a seductive wink,

I'm going to blow a hole

in your head

big enough to skull f*** you in.

That's a small hole.

You shut up, smart ass.

I'll shoot you, too.

Sh*t.

Good morning, Officer.

How can I help you?

Well, for starters,

how about some

personal identification?

Van registration,

proof of insurance, please.

OK.

Shane, can you, uh...

Can you go ahead

and get that for me?

Copy.

What, are you military, boy?

Yes, sir.

Jack.

It's just a paper cut.

Paper cut, my ass.

It looks like somebody's makeup.

Is there anything else

I can help you with?

You know why I pulled you over?

No?

You got a faulty taillight,

dude.

Oh.

I've been meaning to fix that.

I've just been kinda strapped

for cash lately, you know?

Yeah.

Like my granddaddy always said,

"If it's got tits or tires,

it's going to cost you."

Wait right here.

I'm going to run this.

Don't nobody leave the vehicle.

Dude, you just handed

an officer of the law

a registration

with blood on it, man.

Classic.

Everything's fine.

He's going to run the

plates which are clean.

He's going to come back and

just give me a fix it ticket,

all right?

We're good.

He's not the friendliest

guy I've ever run into, huh?

He's just doing his job.

Yeah. But how many people do

you think come down this road

in a given day?

I mean, he's got to be... He's

got to be bored out of his mind.

You know, we got... we got to

be the first ones this week.

Bored pigs?

They mean trouble, Jack.

All right?

They sniff around

looking for sh*t.

And I don't care who you are.

Everyone is hiding a big

pile of sh*t somewhere.

That's a fact.

Let's just see it through, OK?

OK.

This vehicle is registered

to one Edward Banks.

Yeah, that's my pops.

Then you don't need me

to tell you that

he's been reported missing

for the last three months?

No, no need to remind me, sir.

Hey, I don't mean to

bring up personal issues.

You just make sure you get

this registration upgraded.

You got it.

What is that funky smell?

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