Waiting to Exhale

D.J. OVER RADIO:
what's up? This is

k107, broadcasting on New Year's Eve.

Why don't y'all scribble down those

New Year's resolutions and dial me up.

Tell us those lies you're telling yourself,

promises you know you won't keep.

WOMAN 1:
I don't believe in New Year's

resolutions. They're stupid.

- I Promise I will not spend....

WOMAN 2:
No matter what John says...

...this year,

I'm starting my catering business.

WOMAN 3:
If I do let Russell come back,

I'll whip something on him so tough....

WOMAN 4:
I'm gonna lose 10 pounds

and eat right. Fifteen pounds.

Okay, 35. I mean it. Thirty-five pounds.

MAN:
Do you know

where you wanna be tonight?

And where do you wanna be next year?

Think about it. Because we're getting

close to that final hour.

So if you haven't finished

those resolutions...

...you'd better jump it

before it's too late. I've made mine.

How about you?

This is brand-new from

the beautiful chante Moore, "wey U."

K107. check it out.

SAVANNAH:
The deal is,

the men in Denver are dead.

No wonder I'm changing towns again.

It's gotta be better in Phoenix.

BERNADINE:

I gotta pick up the babysitter...

...pick up my gown,

stop and get John's tux.

I'd clone myself,

but I wouldn't have time for the surgery.

ROBIN:
I don't know why I always pick

the wrong men to fall in love with.

My weakness is pretty boys

with big sticks.

GLORIA:
I don't know why Tarik has to

spend New Year's Eve with his homeys.

He sees them every day.

Plus, there are gonna be

all these drunk fools in the streets.

He'd have more fun at home with me,

watching videos.

D.J.:
Just want you to know

that if you're searching...

...somewhere, there's a love for you.

SAVANNAH:

Here it is New Year's...

...and I'm geeked up for a blind date

that's not even all that.

Just some party this guy's voice

invited my answering machine to...

...when got worn out

playing phone tag.

A long time ago, I asked God

to send me a decent man.

I got Robert, Cedric,

Darrell and kenneth.

God's got some serious explaining to do.

So my prayers got more detailed.

Like, how about some compassion?

could he have a sense of purpose?

A sense of integrity?

could he listen?

The truth is, most men are deaf.

They prefer to guess what you need,

but they don't guess worth sh*t.

They lie without a conscience.

what they're best at is convincing us

we should feel desperate.

Thank God I don't fall for that sh*t.

If I had the nerve,

I'd get me some real breasts.

[PHONE RINGING]

Oh, I know that's gotta be Mama.

She's the onIy one

that knows I'm staying in a hotel.

I Iove you, Ma, but tonight....

I'll call you in the morning, Ma.

BERNADINE:
I do not feel like going

to another one of these boring affairs.

- Bernie?

- Yes?

Would you be terribly disappointed

if we didn't go to the party tonight?

crushed.

What?

I guess there's no appropriate time

to tell you this, but...

...I'm going to the party,

just not with you.

- She--

- She?

Yes.

She doesn't wanna be alone tonight,

and I was thinking, "Why should she be?"

It's that b*tch

who keeps your books, isn't it?

And you picked tonight

to flaunt your whore...

...in front of all your business partners

and your friends.

- What are they supposed to think, John?

- The truth.

Finally, the truth.

I'm leaving you for her.

MAN OVER RADIO:
This is a test

of the Emergency Broadcast System.

This is only a test.

Don't worry...

...you can have the house,

and you know I'll take care of my kids--

You wait a minute.

I give you 11 f***ing years of my life...

...and you're Ieaving me

for a white woman?

Would it be better if she were black?

No, it'd be better if you were black!

Thank you, Bernadine...

...for making this easier for me.

I'll be back next week for my things.

MAN:
This concludes this test

of the Emergency Broadcast System.

D.J.:
Allright, time to get

your groove on. All night long.

I don't believe

I'm spending New year's Eve by myself.

This is definitely a first.

Finally gave up on Russell.

A lying, sneaky, whorish Pisces!

[WHIMPERS]

Russell was so fine.

Probably...

...every woman in America

wanted to be with him...

...but you know what, Achey?

Oh, I knew he was mine...

...till....

Till I found that half-slip

in his gym bag.

D.J.:

Phone's ringing off the hook tonight...

...from women wondering

where all the real men are.

So for you fellas out there

running the streets...

...looking for love

in all the wrong places...

...there's something you should know.

Love might be waiting

right there at home.

Ma, I wish you were going out tonight.

I'm just fine, thank you.

you coming in at a decent hour tonight.

It's New year's Eve.

Things don't jump off till midnight.

you should praise God I'm letting

you out at all, the grades you get.

you best get busy. You're gonna be using

Morse code to contact your girlfriends.

I'm doing the best I can,

so just ground me.

Your father's coming on Tuesday.

And?

He's not my father, he's my daddy.

There's a big damn difference.

Watch your mouth.

I see the bastard every two years.

I'm supposed to get excited?

You get excited.

I can't believe this, man.

Why she doing this?

What is that supposed to mean?

Where'd he sleep

the last time he was here?

Ma, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Ma, I'm sorry. Ma, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.

That's none of your business.

I'm sorry.

[BRANDT'S "SITTIN' UP

IN My ROOM" PLAyS]

D.J.:
This is k107

broadcasting live from The Hermosa...

...and this is where the party's

going down.

Why are you sitting there

when you could be in my room?

Let Brandy tell you.

check it out. k107.

Excuse me, is anyone sitting here?

No. Please join us.

WOMAN:

She has her nerve sitting down here.

SAVANNAH:

Hell, yeah.

I'm single and desperate

and have no morals...

...and when you turn...

...I'm gonna flirt my butt off

and then take your man.

I can't stand a woman like her. PIease.

Savannah?

- Lionel? Hi.

- Hi.

God, if this man isn't the one,

at least let me dance till I sweat.

- Would you like to dance?

- I'd love to.

All right.

God, you look so beautifuI tonight.

- Thanks.

- I'm certainIy glad we finally met.

You made it here safely, in one piece.

Our answering machines

almost moved in with each other.

I'm glad we met too.

[THE WHISPER'S "I'M GONNA

MAKE YOU MY WIFE" PLAyS]

You feel so good.

Thank you, Jesus.

And then I did it.

I closed my eyes...

...and I exhaled.

And pretended this man was mine...

...that he was everything

I ever dreamed of...

...that he was the one

I'd been waiting for all my life.

WOMAN:

Lionel.

Lionel.

You haven't danced with me all night.

Savannah, this is my friend Denise.

If I hurry, I can still catch Dick clark.

What's up, Joseph?

I like them pants.

- Thank you, girl.

- Joseph, he show up?

You think he didn't?

come on, honey, you next.

Gloria, look at this.

Go on, there.

Yes, that's nice, very nice.

- Looks just like in the book.

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