Waiting to Exhale Page #2

- Gloria, you like this color?

- I charge you 25 cents for each finger.

- You're gonna charge me what?

Robin, why don't you just

come out of my shop...

...go back to that insurance company

you work for.

Because, baby doll,

I don't punch in or out.

- I got it like that. Remember?

- Lunch hour is over.

So I guess you guys have heard, huh?

- What?

- Jhon Left Bernie.

- What?

- Uh-huh.

And for a white girl.

- You Lying.

- For a white girl?

Honey, if I'm lying, I'm flying.

I saw her just the other night

at the circle K, and she was a mess!

Honey, her hair was in rollers.

She had a funky old bathrobe on.

- I had to take my girlfriend home.

- Joseph, are you serious?

- As a heart attack.

- Be still...

- ...I don't wanna burn your scalp.

- Gloria, I toId you he was an a**hole.

-Excuse her, baby.

ROBIN:
Sorry.

Watch your mouth in here.

537....

- Are you calling? Let me talk--

- Wait.

- Let me taIk.

- It's the machine.

Bernie, this is Gloria.

Honey, you call me at the shop, okay?

We wanna know

what's going on--

How dare that son of a b*tch

leave you with two kids!

- You don't go there up in here.

ROBIN:
Joseph...

- Go on back to work.

- ...I will see you Tuesday.

JOSEPH:
Okay, girl.

- Oh, my goodness, Miss Monroe.

GLORIA:
Bernie, this is Gloria.

Honey, you call me at the shop, okay?

we wanna know what's going on--

ROBIN:
How dare that son of a b*tch

leave you with two kids!

SAVANNAH:
Hi, Bernie, it's Savannah.

I'm here. call me. I'm at the Biltmore.

Hey, hey, hey. Hug?

Thank you.

ONIKA:

John, Iet's go!

Thank you.

GIRLS:

Mama's boy.

Bye.

BERNADINE:

This motherf***er is psychotic.

I bet you there's seriaI killers Iess anal.

A white woman is probably the onIy one

who'll tolerate your smug ass!

yeah, I was your white woman

for 11 years!

couldn't have started

that damn company without me!

Hell, I worked my ass off.

I mean, I got a master's degree

in business...

...and there I was his secretary,

his office manager and his computer!

"No, Bernadine, you can't start

your catering business this year.

Why don't you wait a few years, huh?

Don't start it right now.

Wait one, two, three years...

...I need you to be the f***ing

background to my foreground!"

[SOBBING]

Seven thirty-two! Seven thirty-two!

The number of times we made love!

I remember when that bastard told me

he was counting!

Right after 51!

I'll show you!

F*** me for not leaving your ass then!

But the worst,

oh, the f***ing worst...

...was sending my kids to school

with only two other black kids...

...become you don't want them

to be improperly influenced!

Well, guess what...

...you're the motherfucking

improper influence!

Get your sh*t-- Get your sh*t and get out!

[DOORBELL CHIMING]

Ma'am...

...were you aware

that your car was on fire?

Yes.

Did you start this fire, ma'am?

It's against the Iaw to burn anything

except trash in your own yard.

It is trash.

This is a nice area.

Luckily, a neighbor cared enough.

The next time

you wanna burn something....

It won't happen again.

Michael and I work

for the same company.

He's just been promoted

onto my marketing team.

Michael was no Russell.

I mean, he's not pretty,

but he is available.

Oh....

[MICHAEL CHUCKING]

A Kodak moment.

ROBIN:

Michael had to be about a 38D.

My brain was saying, "Put your hands

anywhere else but on my body.

Then go home. And don't come back,

you human submarine sandwich."

But you can't say that without

hurting his feelings.

Go, Robin. Go, Robin.

come here, baby.

You feel even better

than I thought you would.

come here.

- I got you.

- You got me?

- I got you.

- Whoa!

- You all right?

- Yeah.

- I'm sorry, baby.

- It's okay.

Hey.

[MICHAEL CHUCKLING]

Yeah. All right. All right.

Here I come. Here I come.

Here I come.

Alrighty, then.

Somebody's gotta undress me.

Ooh....

At dinner he told me he drag races,

scuba-dives, deep-sea fishes...

...and a boat speek

in the white Mountains.

I told him I grew up an Army brat.

That I went to ASU,

and I majored in anthropology.

I knew you were gonna be beautiful

all over.

- Ah-ah-ah

- What?

Here you go.

All right.

- You need some help?

- No.

No.

There.

There.

Damn, I didn't even get a chance

to see what he had to offer.

Oh.... Oh, yeah.

Oh.... yes. yes.

Oh, sh*t. Oh, sh*t. God.

The sh*t is good, huh?

Sh*t is good.

What's my name? Say my name.

- What's my name? What's my name?

- Michael?

- What's my name?

- Michael?

Yeah! Oh, sh*t. Oh, this is good.

Yeah, it's good. It's good.

Yeah!

- I love it when you call me Big Papa

- Big Papa. Yeah.

Papa coming!

[SCREAMING]

Ooh.... Pow!

Does he think

he just did something here?

Sh*t. I could've had a v8.

Oh, I knew you were gonna be

somebody special.

[MICHAEL CHUCKLING]

How do you feel?

About what?

Me.

This.

You know, everything.

Tell me what you want,

what you need...

...beacuse whatever it is,

I'm gonna see that you have it.

What's your fantasy?

I mean, what do you want from a man?

Everything.

could you be more specific?

I wanna have a house in Scottsdale.

I own a house in Scottsdale.

What else?

I wanna get married.

And I wanna have kids. Two...

...maybe three.

And?

I wanna eat out two,

maybe three times a week.

I wanna have babies.

I wanna go away for long weekends.

I wanna have a family.

I wanna be happy.

You don't want much.

I couId give you that

and a whole lot more.

What about you, Michael?

What do you want?

Robin, I think I found it.

you don't even know me.

It's about knowing me.

I could give you everything you want,

everything you need, if you let me.

You can start by kissing me.

No.

Slowly and gently.

And he did it right...

...and I felt like silk,

and when I looked at him...

...I didn't care anymore

that he wasn't Mr. Universe.

I just felt young...

...and sexy...

...and beautiful.

And when I closed my eyes...

...and squeezed my pelvis real tight...

...and my body exploded

from the inside out...

...Michael felt just like the real thing...

...and everything was perfect. For once.

SAVANNAH:

Hey, girl.

How you doing? Oh, Bernie.

So good to see you, girl.

I been waiting all day for you.

You okay?

come on, let's go get a drink.

Hey, I bought some toys for the kids.

come on.

JOHN, SR. OvER Tv.. Don't drink

too much, this stuffis expensive.

[WOMAN CHUCKLING OVER TV]

JOHN, SR.:
I'djust like to make a toast

to my beautiful wife.

BERNADINE:
Here you go.

- Thanks, baby.

JOHN, SR.:

Happy anniversary.

Nice house, Bernie.

At $5.00, you can have it.

You know what's funny?

I always thought if I gave him

what he needed...

...he'd give me what I needed.

JOHN, SR.:
I love you.

BERNADINE:
I love you too.

It's amazing what can happen when

you give a man control over your life.

I can't even pretend

it's all John's fault.

So tell me about this new job.

Well, I took a pay cut...

...to see if I have

what it takes to produce.

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