Wake Island Page #2

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Oh, that'll be tough.

Maybe so. Do it anyway.

I've never been late with a contract yet,

not even a government one,

and I'm not gonna start in

on this bird sanctuary.

Mr. McCloskey.

Yes?

So the major wants me

to have dinner with him.

Tell him I'm too busy.

Yes, sir.

That's another thing.

You guys have probably noticed...

this sand pile is stiff with brass hats

trying to play soldier.

If any of'em get in your hair,

tell 'em to come see me. That's all.

[ Reveille ]

[ Skipper Barking ]

Good morning, dear.

The next time I get a furlough,

I'm gonna hire a bugler

to blow reveille for me.

Why?

'Cause when he sounds off,

I'm gonna get up,

beat his brains out,

then go back to sleep.

Buglers ain't got no brains.

Comin' from you,

that's somethin'.

I'm glad I don't have to take

that guff from you much longer.

Seven more days, and all

you'll see is my tail feathers.

I still got that 10 bucks,

and it still says you don't leave.

Do you really

wanna lose 10 bucks?

Put up or shut up.

Okay.

There.

It's a bet.

Wait a minute.

Where's your dough?

I got it, all right.

Don't worry.

Let me see it.

It's very dangerous to leave

money lyin' around here.

The captain's holding it for me.

Oh, so you don't trust me, huh?

Well, look what we have here.

Well, bless their

sleepy little heads.

Maybe we been talking too loud.

Yeah. Shh.

[ Laughing ]

I hope they can swim.

Attention!

What's this, Sergeant?

That's no way to camouflage a gun.

Whose is it?

Mine, sir.

How long have you been

in the marines, son?

Six months, sir.

That's long enough to know better.

That's Artillery Caton, all right.

Snoopin' around this early, huh?

Things used to be so nice here.

Attention!

This is it.

[ Caton ]

All of it?

All of it.

You could hardly call it

Gibraltar, could you?

Twenty-one feet

at its highest elevation.

And in any sort of a breeze,

my friend, it all shakes.

Well, sir, if the navy has survived,

I guess the marines can.

You know, commander,

my outfit's supposed to be

a defense battalion.

I don't see much to defend here.

As a matter of fact,

not much to defend it with.

Only marines.

Well, now that you've landed,

you'd better get the situation in hand.

We will, sir. Starting straightaway.

I have an inspection in 10 minutes.

All right. Let's shove off.

Right.

[ Humming ]

[ Bugle Blaring ]

You look better than Joe, Skipper.

[ Continues Humming ]

Inspection, 10 minutes.

Listen, slap-happy, you'd

better cut out the spring song

and stand by for inspection.

Why, that ain't spring, Sarge.

That's love.

Trouble with that guy,

he ain't got no finer instincts.

That's how you get to be a sergeant.

The dumber them guys are,

the more stripes they give 'em.

You oughta look like a zebra.

Always got an answer, ain't ya?

[ Chuckles ]

Hey, hey! What's that thing?

That ain't no thing.

It's a dame.

[ Wolf Whistle ]

Could be.

You got it upside-down. There.

I like it better this way.

Listen, soldier. When you act

disrespectful about her,

you're actin' disrespectful about the dame

what's practically Mrs. Aloysius K. Randall.

And I don't like it, see.

Why, you thick-headed clunk.

You mean to tell me you're thinkin'

about gettin' married?

You mean to tell me you've found

a dame that would marry you?

The nuptials is bein' performed

New Year's mornin'.

Besides, dumber lookin' clunks

than me get married.

Name one.

Well--

Why, you--

Get your--

-[ Bugle Call ]

- Hey, come on, you guys! Inspection.

Saved by the bugle again.

Saved from what?

From this.

Oh, there they go again.

Aw, fellas, look!

Come on. Cut it out!

You're gonna get us in a jam again.

Act your age, will ya?

You'll get us in more trouble!

Get away!

[ Skipper Barking ]

Attention!

Straighten up here.

- Who's responsible for this?

- [ Both ] Me, sir.

Who are these men, Sergeant?

Privates Randall and Doyle, sir.

Haven't we met before?

Yes, sir. China Station, sir.

I suppose you've already discovered,

Randall, that we have no brig here.

Yes, sir.

You know, I haven't got

much faith in brigs, anyway.

No, sir.

Putting a marine in the brig

is a waste of good manpower.

That's right, sir.

I'll see these men

in the morning, Sergeant.

In the meantime,

I'll try and think of some way...

of diverting your surplus energy

into more useful and constructive channels.

Yes, sir.

I don't like the sound of that

"constructive channels" stuff.

No, sir. Aw, what am I sayin'?

Hey, if this is a sample of Caton's

constructive channels, give me the brig.

What are we diggin' here, anyway?

A slit trench.

Huh?

Bomb shelter for air raids.

What bombs and which air raids?

- What's on your mind, pal?

- Oh, nothing.

I was just wondering what would happen

if marines had to do a good day's work.

What do you suppose they give you

for bustin' a civilian?

In self-defense?

Naw,just bustin' him.

With or without provocation?

Both.

For bustin' a guy like that, I guess

they'd give you the Medal of Honor.

Come on. Back to nature.

Hey, what's happened here?

Pete just passed out.

Too much sun.

Get him over to the hospital.

I'll take charge while you

get another man for the tractor.

Okay, Mac.

[ Air Raid Siren Blaring ]

Hey, what is this? Hogan!

[ Siren Stops ]

Hey, Hogan!

What goes on?

Orders, Mr. McCloskey.

Whose orders? For what?

Civilian air raid drill.

Here. Here it is.

"Approach of enemy aircraft will be

signaled by long blast on claxon horn.

All civilian workers

will thereupon take cover."

Where'd you get that?

Major Caton's office.

Major Caton! Well,

I might as well shake that guy

out of my hair right now.

It's my job to keep those men out there

working and the machinery rolling.

If they're gonna run in the bushes

every time a brass hat toots a horn,

I'm gonna wind up behind the eight ball.

The responsibility for the life of every man

on this island is invested in us.

In times like these,

air raid drill is necessary.

In times like these, it's necessary

for you guys to let me get my job finished.

We're just as anxious as you are

for you to finish your job.

Right. Then quit stampedin' my men

with that peewee auto horn

and let me get to it!

Everybody must participate

in the air raid drill.

There will be no exceptions.

So it's a must, is it?

Exactly.

Well, General, the first man of mine that

ducks in the bushes when the horn blows...

is gonna get a two-by-four

over his head.

Mr. McCloskey!

Sir, I'm going to give you

a bit of advice.

Orders from the United States

Navy Department will be obeyed!

[ Engine Rewing ]

In trouble?

[ Both Laughing ]

Yes, and I want you guys

to push me out.

[ Laughing ]

Did I hear right?

- Yeah. But it ain't right.

- Come on. Get up outta there.

On your way, bubble puss,

or I'll pat ya with me shovel.

Are you gonna come out peacefully,

or do I have to drag you out?

You start swingin' right now, bud.

I'll be with you in a second.

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