Warlock Page #2

Hear me when I say he's evil.

Evil absolute.

We'll run him down

to the station,

but in the meantime,

here's some advice.

Get away from this house.

You got a watch?

Yeah.

Time me.

You've reached 911

police emergency.

Please stand by.

Your call will be handled

as soon as an operator

becomes available.

Ohh!

Tout, tout, through and about,

your callow life in dismay.

Rentum oscillum tormentum.

A decade twice over a day.

This guy put some kind of

hoodoo hex spell on me.

He made me 40 instead of 20.

Is that what this guy did?

There's no crime of

which he's incapable.

Hey, hey, uh... ahem.

Other door, ok?

Other door.

Not a local product, are you?

Too late!

The evil one is back!

It's too late!

16 hundred and 91?

Aye.

Like almost 300 years ago?

As queer it seems to you,

'tis even more so to me.

He did this?

20 f***in' years,

and not one party.

What a total ass-burn.

The altar table, he broked it?

Yeah, he broked it.

Hey, look, I didn't spring you

so you could come fix furniture.

What about me?

How do we fix my face?

What was it he took from you?

20 years.

An object.

What kind of object?

Something small.

Something personal to you.

My bracelet.

Like that?

He took my charm bracelet.

Then you must reclaim it.

Only then can the

spell be countered.

Reclaim it?

This I spied earlier.

'Tis yours? The whole of it?

Just salt.

We'll take your coach.

We'll take a minute here.

Do you mean I gotta

get my bracelet back

to break the spell?

Back from that warlock...

the guy who finger-paints

with body fluids?

'Tis the one way.

This you must do.

There is no question of it.

You see this? Insulin.

It's the one thing I must do.

I hate it 'cause

I have to do it!

I'll just cut and

dye my hair again.

Hey, 40 ain't so bad.

I'll buy a little tennis skirt

and prance around town

like those b*tches

in their BMWs.

Sorry, Redferne,

but if you're nuts enough

to wanna find this guy,

you're on your own.

You realize not.

Realize?

What?

What the spell has done.

It's aged me 20 years.

Not aged.

Aging.

Are you saying that tomorrow

I'm gonna wake up... 60?

I say this.

Unless you find the warlock

and thereby your bracelet,

you shall die in

but half a week.

Die?

Of old age.

That didn't help.

Let's tarry not.

Hey, let's get things straight.

All I want is the bracelet.

I don't give a sailing

sh*t what he did to you.

Look...

Soon as I'm 20 again,

you are on your own,

got that, Bud?

Look, if you're hungry,

we'll just stop.

Ok, what are you doing?

Salting the leather.

No kidding.

How come?

Witches loathe salt.

Don't blame 'em.

Salt, sugar, sulfites.

All that sh*t will kill you.

Tell me...

Must we travel on just

one side of the roadway,

or is it whichever we choose?

Yeah. It's just one side.

Which side might that be?

The right side.

Let your attention

lie before you,

not beside you.

Check this.

Some guy from the 17th century

teaching me how to drive.

How quick they learn.

He's gotta go deep.

He's gotta go deep.

He needs 10 yards. It's fourth.

It's fourth and 10.

He's going!

He hikes the ball,

throws it.

Good!

Gets it again.

Gets it again. Makes a pass!

Throws it up.

When you pass,

you can't let those

little stick guys

get between you

and the receiver,

or else they'll keep

intercepting, ok?

Yeah! 6 points!

Now I kick off to you.

You can't punt on first down.

Nobody does that,

not even Tampa Bay.

Don't you watch football?

Whence comes it?

Huh?

The music.

Oh, there's a church over there.

And how is it you're not there?

Oh, I never go.

My dad hates all that stuff

about Jesus and the

12 apostrophes.

Aw! Intercepted.

Your turn.

How come you're not there?

Church?

Yeah. It's Sunday.

No witch can set foot

on church ground.

Ha. You're telling

me you're a witch?

You ain't no witch.

Witches are girls.

Some are men.

Yeah?

So where's your broomstick?

Witches fly on broomsticks.

Didn't you never see

the Wizard of Oz?

I need no broomstick to fly.

Yeah?

What do you need?

You take Mastercard?

With plenty of I.D. We do.

20th century money. Great sh*t.

Spend as much as you want

till you hit your limit.

Then you've got

50 bucks a whack.

What was that?

Fellas up in the hills

hunting coyote.

You eat coyote around here, huh?

Well, a boy over at

the trailer park

was killed by one.

They do that sometimes.

A coyote will come down,

drag off a small child.

Boy was fairly well

chewed up, so I hear.

Skin taken clean off.

Pray, wait.

It was your son...

the boy killed?

For your loss I grieve...

But I have need

to ask one thing.

Had he been baptized?

Who are you?

Why are you asking me this?

Was the boy baptized?

No.

His father wouldn't allow it.

So...

Clue me.

The warlock will

travel swifter now.

I'm not tracking here.

You think he killed the kid?

Of all ingredients

used by a witch,

the most coveted is human fat.

If that fat is cut from

an unbaptized male child,

there is but one purpose,

one thing it will beget.

I'm listening.

Flying potion.

You got KKTY, Tucson,

ridin' shotgun and

keepin' you company...

No little people inside.

Oh, I gathered.

Wanna know how it works?

If 'twill help find the warlock.

Highly doubtful.

Hey, you know the

earth is round?

For some years now.

Ask me anything.

I took 2 years of high school.

Come on. Ask me something.

Why is it you paint your face?

Nothing wrong with

a little makeup.

Especially now.

Satanists paint their

faces, not goodly women.

Are you saying in 1691

gals didn't wear any makeup?

If my Marion had but...

nay, goodly women do

not paint themselves.

You married way back there?

Well, you just said "my Marion. "

Who's she?

We need new bearing.

Your sister?

Pray, stop the coach.

Some squeeze? Stop here.

Who the sh*t's Marion?

Stop!

Ohh, think then

talk, banana brain.

God.

Oh, God.

Ohh...

God.

Ohh.

Go on. Go without me.

I don't wanna know

how bad it is.

Please.

Please, don't look.

Please. No.

Oh, my...

Why couldn't he just kill me?

Nothing could be

worse than this.

His very thought.

The cream's gone bad.

Couldn't be.

I brought it in just yesterday.

Want to taste it?

Nah, I got a lot of

work to do, dad.

If you're done helping Elsie,

maybe you can turn out

the horse for me.

Hey.

Hey.

Come on, hurry up!

I'm gonna beat you!

Can I ask you a question?

Will you please not have

a meltdown this time?

Ask.

Who's Marion?

That's why you're after

the warlock, isn't it?

Yesterday, you cared not

to know such things.

Yesterday was 20 years ago.

She...

She was...

Your age...

your true age.

What a blessed vision.

A soul as pure as God's own,

my Marion.

She was my good wife.

I thought you said

you weren't married.

'Twas long ago,

even before here I came.

What happened to her?

The warlock happened.

Pray, stop the car.

What's the matter?

Pray, I bid you,

stop the car, girl!

Redferne. The compass.

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