What Happens Next Page #2

Well, hi!

Aren't you a pretty girl!

And what is your name?

Lt.

Well, she, technically.

Well, we must

give you a name.

What are your thoughts?

I really haven't any.

Okay.

Let's see.

She's got a strong,

little build,

a beautiful face,

and she's very quiet.

What does that bring to mind?

The perfect wife.

Now, wouldn't that

be Mrs. Greco?

I think that's exactly right.

So I guess that's you -

Mrs. Greco.

Oh, I'm sorry...

No, that's a perfect suggestion.

You're serious about that?

Mrs. Greco.

Absolutely.

You know, it's usually better

to have a one-word name,

like Spot or Buttercup.

It's much easier

for the dog to understand.

I just...

I don't know if

the name 'Mrs. Greco'

would be the most desirable.

Mindy, there's 100 old dogs

within one square block

that desire nothing more

than the name 'Mrs. Greco.'

Shall we?

Okay.

Well, today we're going to teach

Mr. Greco and Mrs...

Uh, Paul. Please.

Sorry.

Paul and Mrs. Greco when

and where to sissy and poopy.

Well, I've a few very simple

steps you must practice,

and if you stick with it...

and most importantly

be consistent...

she will be housebroken

in no time at all.

Stay.

Good stay!

We want to reinforce

good behavior

with the tone of our voice.

We want to sound happy

when we reinforce good behavior.

We must always communicate with

the dog at the time of action.

Time of action.

Got it.

The first thing

we must teach her

is the distinction

between inside and outside.

So every time you cross the

threshold to leave the building,

right at the time of action,

I want you to say, "Outside."

And every time you cross

the threshold to come back

into the building,

I want you to say...

"Inside."

Yes! Very good.

I'm a quick study.

The point is to try

to catch her in the act.

When you do

catch her going sissy,

in a happy voice, say,

"A sissy, sissy...

A sissy, sissy,"

until she is done.

Only do this

at the time of action.

Same goes if you

catch her pooping.

In a happy voice say,

"A poopy, poopy...

A poopy, poopy,"

until she is done.

So stay consistent

and she'll make the connection.

Okay.

Inside, outside...

sissy, and poopy,

time of action,

be consistent.

You are a quick study!

Thank you, Mr., uh, Paul.

It was such a pleasure

meeting you both.

Oh, here's my card.

If you have any questions,

just call me.

Take care.

Thank you.

Morning, Mr. Greco.

Who do we have here?

It's a real beauty.

Boy or girl?

Girl.

Aw, what's her name?

Mrs. Greco.

Mrs. Greco...

Well, I know a lotta ladies

are gonna be jealous of you.

She's a real beauty, Mr. Greco.

Good luck with her.

Thank you.

- Outside...

- Mr. Greco!

- Good morning, sir.

- Morning.

Okay, do your thing.

You wanna walk.

Okay, we'll walk.

Yeah, no -

No, no, no!

That's bad.

Sorry.

Oh, hi.

I'm Andy.

This is Bean.

He's kind of a snob,

but he plays well with others.

Paul Greco.

That's Mrs. Greco.

Oh, well,

aren't we formal, missy?

Hey, would you care to sit?

Yeah. Sure.

Come on...

Come on.

Here, may I?

I could tie her up

so they can play together.

Oh...

It's not a bad idea.

Come here.

Say hi, Bean.

Wow, she is adorable.

What, about 14 weeks?

Your guess is as good as mine.

Bean is almost two.

Really?

So how does your wife feel about

sharing her name with the dog?

What?

Oh...

That is the only Mrs. Greco.

Interesting.

Your name again?

Andy.

Yes.

So, Paul,

do you live around here?

Right there.

Um, me?

Oh, well, I actually

live right over there.

It's very nice.

So I've never seen you

in the park before.

Dog.

Right.

So now you're one of us.

Pardon?

The dog people.

Excuse me?

One of the regulars, you know.

Oh.

Dogs have to go out everyday.

You do know that, right?

Seriously?

I have to do this every day?

Well...

Oh, here, let me.

Thank you.

It was very nice meeting you.

Goodbye, Mrs. Greco.

Say bye, Bean.

Come on.

Good... Good girl!

A sissy, a sissy, sissy!

Inside...

Inside!

I feel like an idiot.

Morning.

That you, Mr. Paul?

And Mrs. Greco.

Miss Elise be calling you twice.

I told her you were

with that thing at the park.

And your nephew called.

He wanna stop by or something.

Brian called? When?

Just now.

Brian! Where are you?

[Shutter clicks]

Oh, always with the pictures.

Come here.

Always, you know that.

You know, you're such

a good looking boy.

But what's with the shirt?

You can't press your shirt?

No, it's made to look like this?

Intentionally wrinkled?

Can you at least tuck it in?

You know, it's much more

contemporary these days

to wear a shirt out.

You should try it;

you'd look hip.

Yeah, I don't think

I'm ready for hip.

All right, all right.

We'll consider you

a work in progress.

The party was terrific,

by the way.

No, no, no.

Not you too, Uncle Paul.

I know. Your mother can be

a little difficult sometimes.

A little.

But you need to work harder

to find common ground with her.

Common ground?

We don't agree on anything.

And it's like she has this

picture in her head of what,

what she thinks

I'm supposed to be,

what she thinks is

socially acceptable.

You know, of what

she thinks is important.

I know.

But you still

have to talk to her.

I mean, why doesn't she

want me to be happy?

You know she wants

you to be happy.

Yeah, she just has that

funny way of showing it.

So...

How's biz?

[Shutter clicks]

- Sold.

- Yeah?

All right.

I'm not nearly as happy about it

as I thought I would be.

But...

I'm sorry, I don't get it.

You worked like a dog

your entire life.

I bet you made a killing.

Hmm?

You're not happy?

Well, I'm not not happy.

Oh.

I guess I wasn't...

prepared for this.

You should reinvent yourself.

Listen, I went through

four years of law school

practically on auto-pilot.

But one day when I was

in the lab, you know,

just hanging up

a bunch of photographs

that I'd never even

developed before...

I stood there, you know,

just staring at

all of this work.

I realized something that I

never even knew about myself.

That I was a photographer...

an artist.

And what has that gotten you?

A job at the passport office.

[Chucking]

Personal satisfaction.

Oh, and did I mention

a gallery show?

What?

- Seriously?

- Um-hmm.

It's called "Works on Paper."

Still under construction...

maybe another

six to eight weeks...

but they want me to be

their opening show.

Congratulations!

Do you have a theme?

Truth...

People...

Emotionally exposed,

naked, real.

Gritty, you know.

Oh, I think I understand.

- I'm not sure your mother will.

- Exactly.

That's the story

of our whole relationship.

It's like I'm a work

of contemporary art...

An abstraction

she will never understand.

[Shutter clicks]

Oh, sh*t!

It's almost 2:
00.

Claire!

Got to take her out.

I'd like you to meet Mrs. Greco.

- You're serious?

- Um-hmm.

Now that's a f***in' hoot.

I thought so.

I'm gonna call Chip,

have him send someone up

to take this thing out.

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