Where to Invade Next Page #5

I want children to play.

And that was the principal.

I'm planting the American flag

right here in the middle of your school

and claiming

this great idea for us.

Thanks for stealing it.

Yeah, that's how we roll.

- All right.

- I'm just saying.

So after getting

a great K-12 education,

where do you go next?

Deep in the heart

of the eastern slopes of the Alps

is the home of Rapunzel

and Sleeping Beauty--

Slovenia.

Not Slovakia, Slovenia.

Actually, much of Slovenia's mail

gets missent to Slovakia,

but that's not why I'm here.

Slovenia is a magical fairyland

home to the rarest

of mythical creatures--

a college student with no debt.

How much debt

do you have here, being a student?

None.

- None.

- It's free.

Slovenia is one

of dozens of countries

where it is essentially free

to go to university.

Do you have any debts?

No.

Do you know what I mean

by debt?

- Not really.

- No?

Debt is, um, when you owe other people

a whole lot of money.

- Ah. We don't have it.

- No, we don't have any. No.

No. No.

- Nothing?

- Nothing.

I did find one student with debt.

I actually moved here four years ago

to finish my education

'cause I couldn't afford

to go to CU Boulder anymore.

- Really?

- University of Colorado, yeah.

- Yeah.

- I still owe the government $7,000.

- So, what do you pay here now?

- I don't pay anything.

- Nothing?

- No.

You're an American?

Why'd you decide to come here?

I couldn't even afford

to finish community college.

So, then I found out

the situation in Slovenia.

I had never heard

anything like that before,

- school being so cheap.

- Did you even know where Slovenia was?

No, I had no idea

where Slovenia was.

Yeah, but, seriously, what kind

of education are you getting here?

- It's miles better.

- Really?

Yeah, it's not even comparable.

It's like high school here

is more difficult

than American

undergraduate work.

How do you say in Slovenian,

"Any American student can come here

and go to university for free?"

Wait a minute. Slow, slow.

Do you use

the regular alphabet here?

A-B-C-D-E-F-G?

Yes, we do.

- We have 26, right?

- One less, yeah.

Which one did you cut out?

Did you cut out "W" while Bush

was president or was that before?

I'm just curious.

No, it's not--

it's from the beginning.

It's from the beginning.

It has nothing to do with Bush.

- No, nothing.

- Okay, all right.

Luckily, the University

of Ljubljana in Slovenia

offers nearly 100 courses of study

that are taught in English.

Why do they do that?

You're a foreigner.

I mean, it's-- their tax dollars

are paying for you.

Well, I think-- the thing is that here,

education is really seen

as something

that's really a public good,

and the issue is once you start charging

foreign students for education,

you automatically open up the idea

that you can charge everyone.

And as soon as anyone

starts paying tuition,

the entire idea of "free university

for everyone" is under threat.

That changes the nature

of school being a public good.

A while back,

the government of Slovenia

decided it was time

to start charging students tuition.

That sent a shock wave

through the country

and the students responded.

We organized

a protest against that law.

We spent nine months meeting

with the minister for education,

with the heads

of the universities.

We managed to delay the law

long enough

for the government

to eventually collapse.

Wait a minute. An organization

that's got 40 to 50 active members...

- Yes.

- ...and you helped to bring down

- the government...

- That's right.

- ...and force a new election?

- That's right.

That's amazing.

That's an amazing story.

Here's what students do

when the government tries to fleece them

in countries like Canada...

...Germany, France,

Finland, and Norway.

And here's what happens each time

there's a tuition hike in the U.S.

I would like to give you

a small present to memorize...

- Oh, thank you.

- ...your visit to the university.

Here, there's a very strong tradition

of lace-making.

- Of lace-making?

- Lace-making.

But this is a metal lace.

No man has ever given me

a gift of lace before,

so thank you for this.

The idea

of making college free

and not sending 22-year-olds

into a debtors' prison...

was something I could definitely

take back to the United States.

I asked for a meeting

with the president of Slovenia.

And, strangely enough,

they gave me one.

- How are you today? Welcome.

- Thank you.

- How are you?

- It's such a pleasure.

No, it's an honor to meet you.

Thank you for seeing me.

The president

was happy to meet with me,

but he ordered my crew

out of the room

because he did not want

any witnesses to his surrender.

Thank you so much.

See how easy that was?

Success.

No casualties, no P.T.S.D.,

no Dick Cheney.

Just me walking away

with something better than oil.

I've just met with

the President of Slovakia...

...and he has surrendered

to the United States.

I have invaded your country,

essentially,

to take this incredible idea

that all college

should be free for everyone.

Thank you.

Germany.

With no student loans to pay off,

imagine then going

into the real world

and getting a job where you

only work 36 hours a week,

but got paid for 40,

a place where you can still find

a thriving middle class,

even amongst people

who make pencils.

We are producing pencils.

- Pencils?

- It's still a good business.

- We start in 17-- still, yes.

- Still?

Even with computers

and everything?

They're still buying pencils.

And, by the way, last year

was the best year

in producing pencils

in Germany ever.

Where are the pencil factories?

The pencil factory is this here,

around us.

- Right behind us?

- Yeah, yeah, those factories.

No, no, no, no.

These aren't factories.

- They have windows.

- What do you mean, windows?

Factories don't have windows.

Doch.

Of course we have windows.

They must have good light.

What do they need sunlight for?

They're just making pencils.

Yeah, but good pencils

and also to feel better,

not to get sick.

Because if you have workers who are ill,

then you have problems.

We don't want that.

I opened a door...

Hello.

...and found something

that was missing in America.

The middle class.

What's everybody doing in here?

You're on a break?

You only work

36 hours a week as it is!

How many of you

have a second or third job?

Nobody.

You're laughing

like that's a funny idea.

You leave here at 2:00 PM.

You're home at 2:30.

What do you do

with all this free time?

And do what?

- Nothing.

- Nothing?

In Germany, work is work.

And when work is over,

work is done.

In fact, they're so concerned

that the workplace

has created so much stress

that under the German

universal health care system,

any stressed-out German can get

their doctor to write a prescription

for a free three-week stay

at a spa.

You don't have to cook,

you don't have to wash.

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