Willow Page #7

MADMARTIGAN:

Least I'm not down there herding

sheep!

Airk laughs sourly and rocks the cage.

AIRK:

You're lucky somebody got to you

first, Madmartigan! I'd've killed

you myself after that stunt at

Land's End!

He swings that cage and starts to ride away.

MADMARTIGAN:

Airk! Come on, Airk. Lemme outa

here.

AIRK:

(really sarcastic)

Hey, remember? You don't need my

help, Madmartigan. Little rabbit

trap like this? Come on! I could

open it for you, but I wouldn't

wanna insult you!

MADMARTIGAN:

Gimme a sword, Airk. I'll win your

war for you.

Airk quickly drops the banter and glares at Madmartigan seri-

ously.

AIRK:

You're nothing but trouble, Madmar-

tigan. And I got plenty of that.

Stay in your coffin and rot!

Airk spurs his horse and smashes the cage as he charges

off.

MADMARTIGAN:

I'll be around long after you're

dead, Airk! You slime! When I get

outa here I'll cut your head off

and stick it on a pig-pole!

WILLOW:

Friend of yours?

Madmartigan snarls down at Willow as the army continues

to march by. But then he quickly gets cute again.

MADMARTIGAN:

Hello, little baby...

EXT. CROSSROADS - DAY - LATER

A ghostly wind hants the barren crossroads. The road

is pocked with hoofprints and wagon tracks. Willow

shakes his head at the ashes of his dead fire.

MADMARTIGAN:

Whatcha thinkin' about, Willow?

WILLOW:

I hate this.

Madmartigan squeezes his face between the bars of his

cage.

MADMARTIGAN:

Nobody's gonna take your baby.

Know why? Nobody cares...

(beat)

Except me.

(wistfully)

You wanna go back to your farm.

You wanna go back to your family.

I could take care of that baby.

I'll look after her like she was me

own.

WILLOW:

You don't know anything about ba-

bies.

Madmartigan kneels and straightens up and points up his

finger astutely.

MADMARTIGAN:

Ahhh! But I know a lot of women

who do. Why, if I had somebody in

my life--a little daughter for

instance--I'd have a reason to

live...

He clsps his hands together outside the bars, plead-

ing:

MADMARTIGAN:

Willow. You can't let me die here.

Not when I wanna help you.

Willow looks at the baby in the porta-crib. Then looks

up the empty road. Then looks hard at Madmartigan.

WILLOW:

You gotta promise to feed her.

MADMARTIGAN:

I will.

WILLOW:

Fresh goat's milk.

MADMARTIGAN:

Absolutely!

Willow draws his dagger and begins to hack at the

chain.

WILLOW:

And give her a bath everyday, and

don't let her get cold. And keep

her diaper changed.

MADMARTIGAN:

Of course! I promise!

Willow hacks and pries at the chain until it breaks

open. The bottom of the cage falls out, dumping Mad-

martigan into a heap of rags and dust.

MADMARTIGAN:

Come to Daddy, little darlin'.

(picks her up)

I think she likes me!

Kneeling on the ground, he plays with the baby. Willow

quickly hitches the papoose to Madmartigan's back and

hands him supplies.

WILLOW:

Here are her diaper rags. And this

is her milk bladder. And when she

cries--she's either hungry or she's

tired--rock her on your left

shoulder. She likes that.

MADMARTIGAN:

Don't worry, Willow. She's in good

hands. You haven't made a mistake.

Willow takes the baby and kisses her.

WILLOW:

Bye.

He puts her in the papoose.

WILLOW:

(to Madmartigan)

Please take good care of her.

Madmartigan stands up. He towers above Willow. He

pats Willow on the head.

MADMARTIGAN:

You've done a great job. Now you

go back to your family and get your

crop in.

Madmartigan smiles, turns, and marches off down the

road. Willow sighs with relief, his task accomplished.

He watches Madmartigan and the baby disappear over a

hill.

EXT. ROAD - DAY

Swinging his arms and whistling a tune, Willow struts

proudly up a gentle hill.

WILLOW:

Look, it's Willow Ufgood! He's

come home! Welcome back, Willow!

He deserves a medal: he's quite

mystical. For honor, for bravery,

for his intuitive powers...

(he chuckles)

...let's make him Apprentice

Aldwin. Better still: High

Aldwin! Make way! It's Willow Uf-

good, High Aldwin of---

The baby cries! Willow spins around. Flying towrd

him is an incredible VULTURE with enormous winds. In

its claws it carries the baby, papoose and all. It

swoops straight at Willow, buzzing him, and Willow hits

the dirt. He looks up. To add to the wonder: riding

the vulutre is an ELF.

WILLOW:

Come back here, you! That's my

baby!!

The vulture zooms off into the tall majestic trees of

the forest, with the baby crying. Shouting and waving

madly, Willow gallops after it.

EXT. THROUGH THE FOREST - DAY

Willow tears after the vulture which vanishes in the

towering trees. As the path narrows, something whis-

tlse past his ear. Finger-length arrows rain down on

him from every direction, peppering the surrounding

trees. Some even hit Willow. He plucks them out as he

races along.

He comes to a fork in the path: Decision! He starts

down one way, then slams on the brakes. He sees ropes

and nets.

WILLOW:

Oh no, it's a trap!

He hurries back to the fork and takes the safer route--

WILLOW:

Oh noooooo!!

--and gets swallowed by a deadly pit.

INT. ELFIN THRONE ROOM - UNDERGROUND

Willow wakes up as a pail of water hits him in the

face. His feet and wrists are being bound. Several

little ELVES are gawking and laughing at him. They

wear samurai-type outfits and angry little haircuts.

WILLOW:

(focusing)

Where am I? Where's the baby?

FRANJEAN, the Elfin king, struts forward arrogantly.

He speaks a haughty, nasal accent resembling French:

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