Win a Date with Tad Hamilton! Page #5

- See you at seven.

- OK.

- OK.

Stop. Seriously.

You go, girl. You get your man.

lt's room eight.

Just go down

to the door marked eight.

- All right.

- lt's just past seven.

If you hit nine, you've gone too far.

- Got you. No phone calls, please.

- All right.

- Thank you.

- Have a great night.

- You, too.

- I'll see you tomorrow.

- Very good.

.

OK.

He wants your goodness

to rub off on him.

- I know, right?

- I see.

And you actually believe this?

- Why wouldn't l?

- Wow, Rosie.

There's innocent, there's childlike,

and then there's just asking for it.

He wants your goodness

to rub off on him?

He wants your ass

to rub off on him is more like it.

- Oh, my God.

- Yeah. Whatever.

- You can't go out with him tonight.

- What do you mean I can't?

I mean that I need you

to stay for the late shift.

Janine's sick.

Yeah, she's got a cough.

- She does not.

- No, not yet, but she will.

She's definitely coming down

with something.

No, she's not.

Janine, cough for me. Cough for me.

- See? God, it's all in your lungs.

- What is?

- Nothing. You're fine.

- No, you're not.

Do not tell my employees

when they are fine.

She's fine.

Even if she weren't,

you'd have to find somebody else

because I am going out

with Tad Hamilton.

- Stop that.

- I did feel something in my lungs.

You're not getting off tonight, Janine.

Bob, not now.

- Everywhere Inn.

- Yeah.

Do you guys have any other rooms?

Or how about suites?

Well, yeah, we got sweets.

We got some lollies here by the register

if you want to come on by

and get yourself a lolly.

No, I mean maybe something

a little bigger or newer?

- Bigger and newer?

- Yes, I understand what you mean.

And no, we don't have suites like that.

OK, I guess that's cool.

That's cool, I guess.

- Can you hold on a second?

- Yes, sir.

- Hello.

- Hi, big guy. Where are you?

I'm at a motel in Fraziers Bottom,

West Virginia.

OK. Words I never heard anyone utter.

- She's special, Richard.

- Who?

- The girl from the charity thing.

- The Win-A-Date girl?

You flew to a place actually called

Fraziers Bottom, West Virginia,

and are staying in a motel

in order to nail the Win-A-Date girl?

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

I don't want to nail her.

Please don't put it in those terms.

Oh, forgive me, Lord Byron.

I want to be around her, you know?

She has a goodness.

There's a lot that I can learn from her.

I'm trying to feed my soul, OK?

- I´m trying to find a way to be happy.

- You want to be happy now?

- This is big for me, Richard.

- Oh, God.

- This is a turning point for me.

- You think that today.

But by the end of the week,

when you've nailed her,

you're going to feel differently.

And what do you suppose happens then?

- I don't...

- I will tell you what happens then.

You pulverize her heart,

and then the press finds out

and all the good that was done

by the promotion gets washed away.

And Jimmy lng continues breathing.

People like you can't have

relationships with girls from Montana.

- West Virginia.

- Whatever.

- Why not?

- You're too different.

Your values are different.

- For example, she has them.

- No, this can work.

It can't and when it ends,

it's very bad for business.

There are more important things

than business.

I don't even know who I´m talking

to now. Hello? Is this Tad?

- What have you done with Tad?

- I got to go, OK?

No, you do not got to go. You're going

through some kind of a phase.

An extreme version of your normal

in-between-jobs insanity.

And it has a hold of you.

You need to come back to LA,

have a Bushmills and a Percocet,

go out with an actress

looking to advance her career and

end this self-destructive behavior.

- I'll talk to you soon.

- No, Tad. Bad Tad.

- Bye, Richard.

- Don't hang up on me.

Owww!

- Hello?

- Yes, Mr. Hamilton. I am here, sir.

You wouldn't happen to have

a masseuse on staff?

No, but I am a very fast learner,

and I could, you know... Hello?

It always comes around

Coming.

You must be Tad.

Must be. You are Tad.

I know what you look like.

- Nice to meet you, Mr. Futch.

- Henry, for God's sake.

- Please, come in.

- Thank you.

- Rosie'll be down in a minute.

- OK, great.

May I offer you a chocolate martini?

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