Wyvern
- TV-14
- Year:
- 2009
- 89 min
- 148 Views
- Ah!
(sucking in breath)
Jeez.
Oh, man.
Idiot.
You big, dumb...
That's not too bad.
Holy Mary, Mother of God!
(roaring)
(roaring)
Ah! Ahhh!!
(screaming)
(screams ending abruptly)
- Good morning, Beaver Mills.
It's 8:
37 a.m.and I'm proud to say
we are all short-timers
at this point.
We made it
without completely losing
what marbles we had left
to begin with.
Yes, you're hearing me right.
Less than two days left
of the midnight sun.
For all of you sleep-deprived
insomniacs out there,
try a cup of fireweed tea
before you go to bed tonight.
And here's a little reminder
to all you B. Mills townies:
tomorrow
is the annual Solstice Festival,
a char-broiled two days
of tasty carcass,
games of chance,
and tests of skill
to count down the hours
before that glorious time
we call the "magic hour."
So today, remember,
keep sane
and don't lose your cool.
For all those registered
for the barbecue,
it starts at 12:
00 noon.Farley, that includes you.
12:
00 noon,no earlier.
2:
00 p.m. is the chainsaw rallyand you have to be
or four feet tall to enter.
(country-rock music)
It's the same
as the days before
There's torn pictures
and there's pale grey
Pieces of me and you
Strewn across the floor
- Hey, Farley, who's winning?
- Me.
- All right, here we go.
We got two Denver omelets,
one over-easy;
three orange juice,
and two coffee.
Would you like cream?
- Uh-huh. He could put cream
in my coffee any day.
- Come on, Susie,
the sheriff's waiting.
Don't let the food get cold.
- But we only ordered
two coffees.
You have three.
- Oh, this one's for Jake.
- Oh, I'll take it to him.
- No, I, um, I...
- Oh, the new guy's
getting the royal treatment
- Be easy on him, Susie.
He lost his brother
a few months back.
- I'm sure that's why
you're being extra-nice to him.
What a Good Samaritan
you are.
(laughter)
- Well,
I do what I can.
- Ah...
Isn't he a breath of fresh air
around here--
- Okay,
come on, Suse, get out.
- Okay, okay, okay.
- Here you go.
Tell the sheriff I said hi.
- Yeah.
- All right, ladies...
- Watch your step.
- I was hoping you would.
(wincing)
- Nah, hand's fine, Doc.
- You're too young
for arthritis, Jake.
Hey, you wanna know
what I think?
- No.
(chuckling)
- I think you messed
your hand up real good
in that accident.
Hairline fracture
of the metacarpal,
maybe even carpal.
Dunno why you won't come in,
let me take a look at it.
- My hand's fine.
- You're real lucky you walked
away from that accident
with a broken hand
and a bad ankle.
When your insurance money
comes in and you get your truck,
get someone
to look at that hand.
- Like I said, my hand's fine.
- Everybody's a tough guy.
Claire.
Thanks, hon.
- David.
Didn't you just leave?
- Yeah.
Hey, can I talk to you a second?
- Sure.
- Look, I've got a conference
in Fairbanks next weekend.
I can bring someone.
It'd be a fun weekend.
I was thinking--
- Sorry, I can't.
- You told me that last year,
Claire.
I'm gonna start
to take this personal.
- Doc, I gotta go on a hunt,
to drop by his place,
take a look at our minks.
They've got a skin rash.
Sheddin' off like piggies
in a meat market.
- Okay, first off, Hass,
pigs don't shed.
And secondly, I'm a doctor,
not a veterinarian.
- What's eatin' him?
It's only a metaphor!
Thanks, Claire.
I'll see you at lunch.
- Of course, Hass.
Ahem.
Well, you know,
I had a coffee for you and...
- Okay.
- He's persistent.
- Yes, he certainly is.
- Mm-hmm.
- Yes.
- What's wrong with him?
He seems like he'd be the...
cream of the crop in this, uh--
- Oh, in this backwards town
of offbeat sourdoughs?
You know,
we're not all funny in the head.
Mind you, after 80-odd days
without night,
even the best of us,
we get a little of the crazies.
- Yeah. What's Travis's excuse?
- The colonel?
Oh, you got me there.
Someone took the rhubarb
straight out of that man's pie.
(chuckling)
- Thanks, Claire.
- See you.
Why don't you come in
and let me fix you up
something to eat?
- Uh... no,
- Oh, come on, Jake.
I mean, you're fixing my stairs
for free.
It's the least I can do.
Besides,
you look like you could use
some good old-fashioned
northern hospitality.
- Hmm.
- L.T.?
(whistling)
L.T.!
Damn!
Ah, hot damn!
- Just have a seat.
I'll be right with you.
- Thanks.
(speaking softly)
for the ladies?
- Oh, thanks, Claire.
This is our last motion.
Motion passed.
And the Women's League
annual solstice meeting
is adjourned.
All proceeds
from tomorrow's barbecue
go to... Beaver Pelt Cafe
restoration fund.
- Thank you, Edna.
And thank you,
Maggie, of course.
I mean,
you ladies, you're so generous.
Are you finished?
- Yes, we are.
- All right, let me get this
out of the way.
And breakfast is on the house.
I don't wanna hear it.
- Okay.
- Here you are, Farley.
The usual.
- I only tolerate her behaviour
this time of year
because of this.
It gets worse this time of year.
- That's funny coming from a guy
who plays checkers with himself.
- The food's cold.
- Food's free, Farley.
You want it hot,
you gotta pay for it.
(sighing)
Let's get you some coffee.
- Thanks. Um...
... what exactly is the deal
with Edna?
- She's talking
to her best friend, Maggie,
who passed away last year.
And...
So we're just supporting her
until she gets through it.
- Thanks again.
- See you.
So, Jake,
you've been in town for a while.
How long are you...
planning on staying here?
- Uh... not sure.
Depends on my insurance claim.
- Why wouldn't it go through?
(stammering)
Wow, that was really nosy!
Sorry. You probably
- It's fine.
- And I just wanted to say
that I'm really sorry
about what happened
to your brother.
- Um...
I'm gonna keep on working
on the steps.
- Right.
Sure. I'll just bring
some food out
to you, then.
- Much appreciated.
- Okay.
(whispering):
Claire,you are such an idiot.
Um...
- Could we get some menus,
please?
- Ahem.
I'll be right with you guys.
And I've seen you go
And now I miss you
like no one
Like no one before
- This just in:
Colonel Travissends his regards
a present in his hot tub.
Not funny, not cool at all.
He only asked that if you took
his lovable mutt L.T.,
please return him.
It looks like this year's
festival shenanigans
are starting early,
with a moose head
in a hot tub.
Here's a heartbreaking,
soul-searching country tune
dedicated to the colonel.
(slow harmonica music)
- Help you, Doc?
- Well, call it a heart
or call it my Hippocratic oath,
I just can't stand
to see a man in pain.
I'm gonna take a look
at that hand of yours, Jake.
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