You Should Meet My Son!

Synopsis: A fish-out-of-water comedy about a conservative Southern mom who discovers that her only son is gay. Determined that he won't go through life alone, she sets out to find him a husband.
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director(s): Keith Hartman
Production: KinoNation
  3 wins.
 
IMDB:
6.7
NOT RATED
Year:
2010
85 min
113 Views


You want a kiss?

- Yes......

All right, you happy?

No I am not happy I want more!

You want more?

All right.

Happy?

Now come on....

No more come on

(laughs)

All right...

Now get your game face on!

You are going to have to tell her sooner or later Brian!

And I will!

Just as soon as I learn CPR

Do you really think she is going to have a hear attack?

Yes I do!

Brian.....

How's my favourite boy?

Hey mom

Dennis, it is good to see you.

Oh my, I always say my son has the nicest room mate.

Where is this one from?

It is a Portuguese red.

Why I can't wait to try it.

I bought you a little something.

Brian you shouldn't have...

It's not my birthday!

Oh it's....... Oh it's

OK what is it?

It's a washer to fix that drip under the sink

Oh you!!! (laughs)

He gets it from his father.

Yeah, so I have heard...

I hope you boys have an appetite

your aunt rose made her famous pork chops

Smells delicious.

Wow aunt rose you look well.

mm mm..... Rose you are looking fine!!

Have you been working out?

Here you go....

Mae?

What?

Mom do you know that your hairs.....

Yes, Light....

It's this new hair stylist, that girl can't seem to do anything right.

What happened to the old one?

Oh you mean Monsieur Felix.

That is quite the scandal.

Not really fit for polite company.

Well you can tell us.

Well... I was having lunch the other day

with Mrs Johnson from the daughter of the confederacy

She has it on very good authority that Monsieur Felix is......

You know...

He's "you know"

No!!!

Yes!!!

A GAY hairdresser.

I know!!

What is the world coming to.

So Mom you stopped seeing Felix,

because he's "you know".

Well what would you expect me to do?

I can't very well have him touching my hair,

After his hands have been...

Lord knows where his hands have been.

(Door bell rings)

Oh! I will get it.

Now who could that be?

(talking at door)

Hello! It is good to see you again

come on in?

Brian, This is Charlotte...

She is a lovely girl that we met at the market.

There you go.

Charlotte this is my single son Brian.

and that's his room mate Dennis.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

Hi...

Hi

Oh Brian, I thought I heard the door.

Well this is Susan, she is the niece

of my dentist Doctor Peterson

Susan this is my single son Brian.

Oh my you look terrible what's wrong?

It's nothing Mom

It's just allergies I will be fine.

OK....

Where's Dennis?

Dennis decided to get his own place.

Oh did he finally find a nice girl?

Not exactly.

Well you tell him not to be a stranger....

He is always welcome at my table.

Rose and I have to finished up a few things in the kitchen,

Why don't you two talk a little?

So your mom do this a lot?

(sigh) yours?

Every Sunday but most of the guys she brings home

are dogs though.

Really?

(Charlotte) Oh yeah.

If a guy isn't married by the time he is 30,

there is a reason

You're a nice surprise though.

Looks wise at least.

(Charlotte) I like your hair,

how do you get it to do that?

Do what?

Well it's up in the middle then....

It's gel

(Charlotte) It's cute.

(Mae shouts from kitchen)

Susan's a lawyer did she tell you that?

Mom we were just discussing it.

So what's your dirty little secret?

Excuse me?

You're not married yet....

Axe murderer?

Compulsive neat freak?

Oh my god.....

Oh my god....

Don't tell me your a trekie.

No.

It's errrr...... complicated.

OK....

(Mae shouts from kitchen again)

Susan did Brian mention he is a teacher?

(Charlotte shouts back to kitchen)

Yes Miss Davis he was just tell me all about it.

You know what I really like that top on you,

it's cute.

Oh yeah, you do?

So.....

You want to see my tits?

(Brian gags)

Yes! I figured that was it.

No.....

Did you have a nice chat?

I am sure you have so much in common.

Oh yes,

there is at least one thing we both like....

Oh that's nice.

So let's start with some salad.

Susan just take some then pass it on to Brian.

So Brian how long have you been out??

Out here in the suburbs....

Oh Brian doesn't live out here.

He has a lovely old house in the city.

It's very spacious, he restored it himself

Now, Dennis helped.

Oh yes, Dennis so was he...

Friend Yes!

Your good friend?

Yes

Your REALLY good friend?

My extra special bestest bud.

Gee why don't tell my mom all about

that court case your working on?

Oh nobody wants to hear about tax law.

No really it is fascinating,

please enlighten us.

So why did Dennis move out?

He said he was tired of the furniture.

But you have such nice things.

You know a lot of times men don't appreciate the

furniture they have till they lose it

Yeah so...?

Tax law?

So how long were you two room mating?

and can we move off the subject now.

You have to talk about it!

it's therapeutic

It's annoying!

It's entertaining!

Aren't they cute?

Yeah it's like they have there own little language.

OK look just tell me...

was it because he wasn't sleeping well in the house?

He was sleeping just fine thank you!

I dunno maybe the mattress was lumpy?

The mattress goes to the gym three times a week.

Look I wasn't belittling your mattress.

I am just saying that you might try changing the sheets.

I have a nice variety of sheets that isn't the problem.

What if you two went out and bought a nice "end" table together?

I have a nice variety of sheets that isn't the problem.

What if you two went out and bought a nice "end" table together?

Call me old fashioned but I don't like to share my furniture.

I am just saying I know a couple of guys in New York,

Who are very happy with a non- traditional floor plan.

No offence but I don't need the decorating tips.

Oh I was just trying to be helpful.

Who would like some butter?

Thank you so much for coming,

I hope you enjoyed yourself?

Oh yes I just had a GAY old time!

Maybe the two of you would like to trade numbers,

you never know when you might like to talk again

maybe grab a coffee

Maybe the two of you would like to trade numbers,

you never know when you might like to talk again

maybe grab a coffee

You know what Brian you and I should go dancing.

I bet you know some great clubs.

Yep

Mom we gotta go.

(Both sequels)

We did it, we did it

This time they are getting married for sure.

I can't wait to have some little grand kiddies....

(Mae shushes Rose)

They are still out there.

(Charlotte talking outside)

Oh come on it will be fun.

My cousin Tony,

is looking for a room mate to and he plays rugby.

Thanks but I think I am going to be out of the

room mate market for a little while.

OK fine.

Call you tomorrow to check on you?

Thanks

Damn why are all the cute one's gay?

She thinks.....

I heard.

How could she think that?

Well, well he does dress awful nice...

Maybe but....

and he was living with a man....

(Rose) in a house they restored themselves

(Mae) but that doesn't mean

(Rose)with all those really nice antiques.

and a cappuccino maker...

and all those pictures of Michaelangelo "David"

all over the shower curtain.....

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Keith Hartman

Keith Hartman (born 1966) is an American writer of speculative fiction and a self-described "struggling film-maker". He has also written non-fiction books on gay and lesbian issues. He has been nominated a number of times for the Gaylactic Spectrum Awards and Lambda Literary Award for LGBT literature. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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