Zero Effect Page #6

Synopsis: Daryl Zero is a private investigator. Along with his assistant, Steve Arlo he solves impossible crimes and puzzles. Though a master investigator, when he is not working, Zero doesn't know what to do with himself. He has no social skills, writes bad music, and drives Arlo crazy. In his latest case, Zero must find out who is blackmailing a rich executive, and when his client won't tell him, why. The only problem with this case is Zero has done something he's never done before: got emotionally involved.
Genre: Comedy, Crime, Drama
Director(s): Jake Kasdan
Production: Warner Home Video
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
7.0
Rotten Tomatoes:
63%
R
Year:
1998
116 min
231 Views


Question:

- Sorry to startle you.

- Jesus.

How do you pronounce

the word t-o-w-a-r-d-s?

You nearly gave me a heart attack.

I had to contact you right away.

What do you need?

I must ask you some things.

Just drive.

Fasten your seat belt.

First of all, how do you pronounce

the word t-o-w-a-r-d-s?

Towards?

And things that have wings and fly?

You mean birds?

That's right. They don't rhyme.

What!?

Never mind.

The other thing was,

why did you kill Clarissa?

I met her my sophomore year.

I was 19...

...and she was 25, I think.

From New York, living in Cambridge.

I met her at a demonstration.

I have never seen anybody like her.

She let me walk her home and she

kissed me for the first and only time.

You can skip right to the part

where you decide to kill her.

Watch yourself, Arlo.

Please describe the circumstances

surrounding your contracting her murder.

After that first night, I was hooked.

I was like an addict.

Finally, she didn't want

to see me anymore.

I guess I got a little obsessive.

My last year of graduate school

I met my wife.

And after I graduated, we moved

back here, we got married...

...and I went to work

with my dad at the company.

And I had all but forgotten about...

...Clarissa.

Then, in 1972,

we'd been back about a year...

...I got a letter from her.

She was here in Portland.

The letter was...

...a threatening letter.

What was it?

I don't think that makes

a thread of difference.

What did the letter say?

She was accusing me of something.

Rape.

Did she want money?

No, she wanted to ruin my life.

I knew no jury'd convict me.

I was convinced of that.

But I couldn't take this

kind of publicity, nor could my family.

I saw...

...my whole future flash before my eyes.

So you hired Kragen Vincent.

He said that for $5,000...

...he could solve my problem.

And that's all I know

about the subject, officer.

So what's in the safe deposit box?

A tape.

A tape he made of our meeting.

Audio tape.

My hiring him...

...our names as clear as day.

Why didn't you just destroy it...

...years ago?

Because I don't know where it is.

Go on.

About a week after he gets caught...

...a man comes to my house

in the middle of the night...

...and tells me that Kragen expects me

to bankroll his defense...

...though a middleman, obviously.

And he also...

...wanted money for his family.

Then he played me a copy of this tape...

...and said if I refused he would

turn the tape over to the police.

He then gave me...

...a key to...

...a safe deposit box.

Said at the end of 25 years...

...when Kragen got out

or if he should die...

...I would be given

the location of the box.

In the meantime...

...l'm to hang onto this key...

...with no lock and our friend

would hang onto his lock with no key.

What would you do if someone was

threatening you like that...

...or blackmailing you like this?

What do you do?

I don't know.

It's never come up.

Imagine it.

Imagine some...

...opportunistic...

...piece of birdshit...

...has got a way to compromise you.

What do you do about it? You can't

buy silence. You can only rent it.

If somebody has something on you,

they'll always have it.

So the cost has no ceiling...

...and the fear has no end.

That's why...

...some knowledge, some information...

...is like a terminal disease.

It's...

...contagious...

...and it's fatal.

Passion is the enemy of precision.

Forget the misnomer 'crime of passion. '

All crime is passionate. It's passion

that moves the criminal to act...

... that disrupts the static inertia

of morality.

The client's passion for this dead

woman had facilitated his downfall.

And the blackmailer's passion...

... would facilitate hers.

When you live with no passion...

... other people's passions

come into glaring relief.

Bullshit, bullshit...

...bullshit!

Jesus! Would you stop it?

Stop it!

Jesus!

Control yourself, all right?

Control myself?

This is f***ing bullshit!

Haven't I been good to you?

Haven't I been f***ing incredibly...

...mindblowingly, fuckingly, divinely

generous as a f***ing saint...

...you ungrateful f***!

Hey, watch it...

...all right?

Ungrateful f***!

Shut up!

Why?

I told you why.

I cannot live like this anymore.

I can't do it to Jess.

I can't do it to myself...

...and I'm sick and tired of working

for the Starks of the world...

...the lowest scum of the earth, buying

their way out of their own messes.

These people are victims of plots

and they need our help.

This guy is a murderer-at-large

who needs our help.

Their business equals their business.

We're not involved.

It has nothing to do...

...with us.

Do you believe that?

We're the good guys.

What are you talking about?

There aren't any good guys.

You realize that, don't you?

You realize there aren't evil guys

and innocent guys.

It's just a bunch of guys.

What am I supposed to do?

Just start taking meetings with people?

Just start talking with people?

Maybe.

F*** that.

You know, you'll figure it out.

I mean...

...you're probably the best...

Excuse me?

Excuse me. You are the best.

I'm telling you that after this case...

...l'm finished.

I meant...

...what am I supposed to do...

...without you?

You want my honest opinion?

You should take all this money

that you've made...

...and move to Europe.

Meet a girl.

See the world. Really see the world.

Don't observe it. See what it's like.

What do you know?

I'm the greatest private investigator...

...in the world.

I'll go check for safe deposit boxes

under the name Kragen Vincent.

I don't know if that's necessary.

What Clearburg probably

meant when he says...

...there's no boxer with the name

Kragen Vincent...

...is that there's no boxes...

...with the name Kragen Vincent.

I think it's a typo.

Right. Right.

He probably used a different name.

That's what I think.

Well, then...

...l'll go get a beer

with my friend Bill.

I said, I think.

But you should go and check

just to make sure.

Fine.

But I really hope that you've heard me.

Sorry to startle you.

What are you doing here?

I followed you.

Back at my car,

this was on the windshield.

Another payment,

due tomorrow morning.

You sure you weren't followed?

I wasn't.

I told you how to contact me.

You should not have come here.

Is he in there?

If I walked in there now,

would Mr. Zero be happy to meet me?

Go home.

Right now. Make the payment tomorrow.

We're very, very close.

I'm sick of cooperating.

It used to be 2 or 3 weeks. Now it's

every two days. Why so close together?

Maybe he's nervous. Maybe he wants

to kill me. I should carry a weapon.

No, you shouldn't.

Look, just don't panic...

...all right?

How dedicated are you, really?

Your timing's impeccable.

- How do you mean?

- Never mind.

Maybe you've got some ambition

of your own. Maybe you want...

...to have your own firm.

You got me pegged. That's all I want

is to someday be Daryl Zero.

I'll give you $ 1 million

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote

Jake Kasdan

Jacob "Jake" Kasdan (born October 28, 1974) is an American film and television director, producer, screenwriter, and actor. more…

All Jake Kasdan scripts | Jake Kasdan Scripts

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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