Zero Effect Page #8

can't escape their nature.

How did you know...

... about me?

Couple of things.

And the receipt last night.

I know.

I forgot to take it.

"Passion is the enemy of precision."

I got sloppy.

Are you going

to come looking for me?

Will you tell him about me so he can

have somebody kill me? Because he will.

I know.

So what are we going to do about this?

There's a man sitting on a bench

behind you.

Oh, God!

It's okay.

Relax.

He has an envelope.

Inside are some fake identification

and some plane tickets.

First Ecuador,

and then wherever you want.

Keep moving, first couple of months.

Stay out of westernized countries

for a while.

Don't carry too much cash on your body.

Give incorrect information...

...everywhere.

And never use your real name.

Thank you.

Thank you.

If you knew I was here...

...why didn't you come yourself?

I'm not sure.

I knew you'd be there...

...but I'd hoped you'd be here.

You know, you could join me.

A person can't escape...

...their nature.

That's what I thought.

You're the best I've ever seen.

So are you.

I've never said the words before...

...to anyone.

You don't have to.

I love you too...

... Daryl Zero.

So ends my account

of the case that I have named...

"...The Case of the Man Who Got So

Stressed-Out Over His Lost Keys...

... That He Eventually Had

a Heart Attack...

... And It Turned Out

They Were in the Sofa All Along. "

I returned the first installment

of my fee...

... as I had not given

a complete explanation.

Some questions are for answering...

... others are better left

to torture and torment...

... for all eternity.

A nagging itch

for the rest of his life...

... seemed reasonable, especially since

I did solve his problem.

He got the tape he'd been waiting for

for so long.

He wouldn't be throwing anymore

money down the toilet.

And I gave back his keys.

This did, in fact, prove to be

my final work experience...

... with my longtime associate...

... though I have assured him

that when he someday finds...

... that he cannot live without me...

... his position will again

be available to him.

He thanked me and suggested

that I not hold my breath.

I also attended the funeral

of the hit man...

... who died not long after

these events described above.

For some reason, I felt

a certain kinship with this man...

... whose life was forever changed

after he failed to remain objective...

... about the lady blackmailer.

Which brings me

to the other participant.

I never made any attempt to find her.

But if my suspicion is correct, she's

flying through the sky as we speak.

"...plummeting towards the earth

like a falling bird..."

... to quote one of my favorite poets.

After investigating her, I found myself

in better shape than ever before.

To me, she will always be a singular,

unforgettable event:

The only time I ever took leave

of my objectivity.

Perhaps the most able blackmailer

of her time, she was at once...

... the worthiest opponent

and the greatest ally.

And the only woman I have ever...

The only woman.

Period.

And though I never would have

have anticipated it...

... in the end she did for me

what I have done for so many.

Helped solve a problem,

first by observation...

... then by careful intervention.

In other words:

The Zero Effect.

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