10 Things I Hate About You Page #16

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BIANCA:

Daddy, people expect me to be there!

WALTER:

If Kat's not going, you're not going.

Bianca turns to Kat, eyes ablaze

BIANCA:

You're ruining my life' Because you

won't be normal, I can't be normal.

KAT:

What's normal?

BIANCA:

Bogey Lowenstein's party is normal, but

you're too busy listening to B*tches Who

Need Prozac to know that.

WALTER:

What's a Bogey Lowenstein?

Kat takes off her earphones, ready to do battle

BIANCA:

Can't you forget for just one night

that you're completely wretched?

KAT:

At least I'm not a clouted fen- sucked

hedge-pig.

Bianca tosses her hair.

BIANCA:

Like I'm supposed to know what that

even means.

KAT:

It's Shakespeare. Maybe you've heard

of him?

BIANCA:

Yeah, he's your freak friend Mandella's

boyfriend. I guess since I'm not

allowed to go out, I should obsess over

a dead guy, too.

WALTER:

Girls

Kat stares Bianca down

KAT:

I know about the goddamn party. I'm

going.

Bianca and Chastity look at each other, thrilled, and burst

into gleeful screams.

A startled Walter clutches Bianca in a protective hug.

WALTER:

Oh, God. It's starting.

BIANCA:

It's just a party. Daddy.

Walter looks dazed.

WALTER:

Wear the belly before you go.

BIANCA:

Daddy, no!

WALTER:

Just for a minute

He rushes to a cupboard and pulls out a padded faux-

pregnancy belly.

WALTER:

(continuing)

I want you to realize the weight of

your decisions.

He hangs the belly on her as she stands mortified.

BIANCA:

You are so completely unbalanced.

KAT:

Can we go now?

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WALTER:

(to Bianca)

Promise me you won't talk to any boys

unless your sister is present.

BIANCA:

Why?

WALTER:

Because she'll scare them away.

Kat stomps to the door, grabbing her car keys off the hall

table and a sweater from the coat rack. She flings open the

door and...

There stands Patrick.

PATRICK:

Nine-thirty right?

Kat's in shock

PATRICK:

(continuing)

I'm early.

She holds up her keys

KAT:

I'm driving.

He peeks in behind her.

PATRICK:

Who knocked up your sister?

INT. BOGEY LOWENSTEIN'S HOUSE - NIGHT

BOGEY, a short Future MBA in a tux, greets his guests like a

pro, handing out cigars and martinis.

BOGEY:

Nice to see you. Martini bar to the

right, shots in the kitchen.

The house is filled to capacity with Padua High's finest Kat

pushes through the crowd. Patrick saunters in behind her

INT. BOGEY'S KITCHEN - NIGHT

Joey lines up a row of shots amid much whooping and

hollering within the jock crowd.

Kat enters, then quickly tries to make an about face. Joey

sees her and rushes over to block her, standing in the

doorway.

JOEY:

Lookin' fresh tonight, P*ssy-Kat

Kat gives him a death look and then stops and points at his

forehead.

KAT:

Wait -- was that?-- Did your hairline

just recede?

He panics, whipping out a handy pocket mirror She's

already walking away.

JOEY:

Where ya goin?

KAT:

Away.

JOEY:

Your sister here?

Kat's face shows utter hatred

KAT:

Leave my sister alone.

JOEY:

(smirking)

And why would I do that?

A RUCKUS sounds from the next room

JOCK:

A fight!

The other jocks rush to watch as two Coffee Kids splash

their cupfuls on each other.

COFFEE KID #1

That was a New Guinea Peaberry, you

Folger's-crystals-slurping-buttwipe.

Caffeinated fists fly. Joey slithers away from the door to

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