2 Lava 2 Lantula!

1

Where's

the damn negotiator?

They said 10 minutes.

10 minutes?

They're all gonna be

dead in 10 minutes.

Sir, I think

we got company.

What the hell

is he doing here?

I don't know. Son of a b*tch

thinks he's a hero now.

Well, he's gonna

get us all ki--

Look out, Jack!

Hold your fire!

Hold your fire!

Get down!

No, Jack! No!

No!

Jack!

Jack!

Don't leave me, Jack!

Don't leave me! Jack!

No!

No!

Nooooo!

Nooo!

Cut! Cut! No!

That's a cut!

Cut! Cut! Cut!

Are those the lines?

Is that the script?

Give--

Colton!

Hey, man,

are you okay?

I think

I hurt my back.

You were

so good, man.

I know why

I quit acting now.

Yeah.

Everything looked

just fine to me.

You looked fine

to me.

Let me rub

that back for you.

Good job, Marty.

Come on.

Come on. Come on.

Let me rub that

for you.

What happened

to the scene?

What happened

to the comedy?

Well, I changed

a few things, kid.

You changed some things?

You can't do that.

Were you gonna

tell anyone?

Well, you know, I--

Wasn't working for me.

It might be

a little too funny.

Yeah, it was

too funny. Yeah.

Too funny?

It's supposed

to be funny.

It's a comedy.

It's called

"Clown Cops."

Yeah, well, my friend--

You came out of

a pizza cop car.

My friend just

got shot, Joshie.

It's a flesh wound.

He lives.

Yeah.

I mean, you seen

the scene.

Have you read

the scene? Have you

read the script?

Yeah, I have,

but my character hasn't.

You know, in my opinion,

it should be

more serious, I think.

You think?

No, you're not

paid to think.

You're paid to act,

I'm paid to direct,

and it's

not going well.

I'm gonna have

to tell the studio.

I don't want to have

to tell the studio.

No. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Joshie, no, no, no.

You know what it is?

I'm--Whoa! I'm crashing.

That's the problem.

I'm crashing.

Are you okay?

Low blood sugar!

Whoa! Whoa! Chair!

Chair! Chair! Chair!

Whoo hoo hoo!

I'm telling you, I'm no good--

Where's Kyle?

Maybe I need a salad

or something. Kyle!

Kyle!

Yes, Mr. West.

Kyle! Lips! Lips!

Quickly! Quickly!

Well, okay.

Kyle, where's that salad,

the kale salad

from Lou's?

There was a problem,

Mr. West.

A problem?

Your credit card

maybe was declined.

Who knows? I don't--

What?

Um, this is

very lovely.

Just go

get some food.

Get your blood sugar

into just a nice

comfy place...

I need something.

Thank you.

and then you

come back here...

Thank you.

and then read

the freaking scene

as scripted!

I promise. I pro--Ooh.

This is nice.

This is

a nice sport coat.

Barney's?

Where's this from?

It's from

my grandfather.

It's beautiful,

really beautiful,

lovely.

I'm sorry I snapped.

It's okay.

It happens.

Just read the scene.

It's moviemaking. Okay.

All right, people,

we're resetting!

Back to one!

I'll be better!

I'll be better.

I swear I'll be better.

What happened?

What happened

with the credit card?

How'd it get declined?

Well, there were several

suspicious charges...

What?

in Fort Lauderdale.

Fort Lauderdale? Who's

in Fort Lauderdale? I--

Gee. Look, just call

the credit card company.

Approve the charges.

Get my kale salad,

and do s--

Wow.

Wow, you're so muscular.

Yeah.

Looks nice.

You're working out.

Sort of.

Good. Okay.

Yeah.

I'm not.

Fort Lauderdale?

Fort Lauderdale?

Who said I was

in Fort Lauderdale?

Your best friends,

Amex and Visa.

Hey, will you

pass me that

mango colada?

Hey! Shh.

COLTON:
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

That's not code name

for a science book?

Mango colada?

No, it's a beverage.

Well, that's alcohol,

and it's Friday.

I'm 21, and I'm parched.

Besides, we didn't

have class today,

so we have

a three-day weekend.

Some of us

went to the beach,

so stop freakin' out.

I'm not freakin' out,

okay? Look,

I'm supposed to be

looking after you while

your mother's gone.

How am I supposed

to do that when I

can't find you?

I'm not 10. I don't have

to tell you everything.

Well, you know what?

You do, as long

as I'm paying for it.

I'm fine,

and I don't need

my stepdad babysitting me.

You're not checking up

on Mom every day

while she's halfway

across the world on

some yoga retreat, are you?

Hey, you know what,

Raya?

You're not

your mother, okay?

And she had

a very tough year

last year.

You know that.

My mom's gonna be fine.

And, no, you're right.

I wasn't there.

I was stuck

in a library for 72 hours

studying for finals week,

being responsible,

which is why you can

trust me now, Colt.

I do trust you, Raya,

and I know you could

take care of yourself.

I know

you're responsible.

And, Raya...

you can call me Dad.

My God.

My God.

My God.

Raya?

What just happened?

Nothing good.

They're here.

Lavalantula!

Run!

Watch out!

God! Raya!

Casey!

Casey!

Raya!

Help me!

No!

Casey!

Casey!

We have

to go!

Hey, this is Raya.

Leave me a message.

Bye.

Raya, call me back.

It's your dad.

This is Lisa Johnson,

and I am here

in the downtown district

of Fort Lauderdale

after massive sinkholes

all over the city

have birthed another wave

of lavalantulas.

And almost a year ago

to the day

where they first

wreaked havoc on Los Angeles.

The big question

on everyone's mind

right now

is when will the military

take action?

Or does Florida

need Colton West?

This is Lisa Johnson

signing off from downtown

Fort Lauderdale.

I'm not

doing this again.

Hey, did you feel that?

No.

Hey, man, this is

not California.

Things do not shake

like this in Florida.

Not outside

of South Beach,

anyway.

Are you all right?

Army helicopters,

shaking!

I'm having

a bad dj vu.

No, you're not.

Were you

on the phone

with somebody?

Yeah, my daughter, Raya.

Where's she at?

Fort Lauderdale.

Man, I heard

that's where the epicenter

of all this mess is.

Come on, Colton.

What would Red Rocket do, man?

Where are those guns

you were working on?

You okay?

This is a modified

XM25 Counter Defilade

Target Engagement System,

specially designed

to shoot armor-piercing

50-millimeter rounds

and my favorite,

liquid-nitrogen bombs.

Ooh.

The Army likes

to call this...

the Punisher.

And Swiss Army knife

in the clip.

But with

our modifications,

I call her

a cold day in Hell.

Ha ha ha.

Have you tested it?

Nope, but she's

pretty as hell.

Mr. West, they're

calling everyone

back to set.

Go ahead.

We're not going

back to set, Kyle.

Excuse me?

When you signed

up for this,

you knew what it

was gonna entail,

didn't you?

Yes, Mr. West.

And you said it was okay

with you, didn't you?

Yes, Mr. West.

So I gotta know, punk,

are you in,

or are you out?

If it means I can stop

getting your salads

and start shooting

spiders, Mr. West,

then I am all in.

Wait.

Who's shooting spiders?

No, the only thing we're

doing is shooting a scene,

a very large,

expensive scene

that's going

tens of thousands of dollars

over budget every minute.

Calm down, Joshie.

Here's the deal.

I'm gonna go

take a whiz,

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