40 the Hard Way Page #2

- Good afternoon, Mr Lang.

Wait a minute. Did you say two weeks?

Two weeks is perfect. Two weeks is

enough. I wanna test for the part.

Test? No, no.

- Ange, listen to me.

- You listen to me!

My mind is made up.

This means too much to me.

I'll pay for the damn test myself!

They'll try to get you

for less, a lot less.

Ange, please, hold it for one second.

Let me show you something.

Rosalie, please, can you... I got this

off the dish last night. You gotta watch it.

(TV) Four times this Party Crasher

has alerted you...

...before killing someone,

and he still got away.

- You care to comment on that?

- Tie your dick in a knot!

Freeze! Slow-mo, slow-mo.

- Isn't that incredible?

- Uh-huh.

Research, Ange.

Look at this face. Look at those eyes.

That's my character. That's my guide.

That's Ray Casanov.

That's the face of a man

who's been to the edge...

...a man who's tasted fear!

- And vomit.

I wanna go to New York tonight.

Call the studio. Get 'em to set it up.

I wanna spend two weeks with this guy.

I wanna eat, sleep, breathe John Moss.

If I can taste his world,

if I can walk his beat...

...if I can get under his skin,

I will nail this part.

- Nickie, I love you.

- I love you too, Ange.

Reality check - you can't leave town.

Your movie opens Friday.

- So what?

- I already booked Johnny, Barbara...

...Phil, Arsenio. Woo-woo-woo-woo!

Tell 'em to run an old one.

They're all the same.

- They just ask about the paternity suit.

- Suits.

What if this cop doesn't

want you tagging after him?

Ange, get real. Two pros exchanging ideas.

Why wouldn't he wanna do it?

Bullshit!

I mean that with all due respect.

There's no way on earth I am gonna

baby-sit some Hollywood rump wrangler.

- I'm on a murder investigation.

- You have no vote. You're off the case.

Look at you. You're all busted up.

If it weren't for Lang,

you'd be on injured leave.

Christ, you can't pull me off this case.

This Party Crasher has

whacked out seven people...

...four of 'em in front of us!

He's nuts! I looked in his eyes.

Know what I saw?

Pleasure. He likes it.

He's gonna do it again. Soon.

Moss, you're off.

Mayor Dinkins insisted.

Evidently this Hollywood actor

asked for you by name.

- What?

- Yes. Come in.

Benny. Wait for me outside.

I gotta talk to you.

All right, here's the story.

Pooley takes over for you.

You are breaking in a new

partner named Ray Casanov.

The guy just wants to blend in,

be another cop on the job...

...so nobody knows he's Nick Lang.

- Yes, sir.

- And Moss, no action.

This guy gets his hair

messed up, we're all in deep sh*t.

Yes, sir.

- Hey, John.

- Captain?

You got two ways to deal with this. You

got the easy way, you got the hard way.

John, do us all a favour

and make the right choice.

- I always do.

- Good.

Son of a b*tch!

Hi, I'm looking

for Lieutenant Moss.

Oh, God. You...

He's over there relaxin'.

- (Billy) Moss!

- What? What?

You got company.

Hi, John.

Susan. Hi, I...

...didn't expect to see

you here this morning.

- Thank you, Billy.

- Aw, wanna be alone?

I tried calling you yesterday

and this morning.

I got your messages. I would have called

you at home, but I lost your number.

That happens. I lost my keys last week.

- Actually, my daughter Bonnie lost it.

- You know, kids.

Yeah. I wanted to let you know I wasn't

mad, even though you didn't show up.

I didn't think you were one of those

Cro-Magnon jerks who stands people up.

- These are yours, right?

- No, I quit. I don't smoke.

Hi.

Thank you, Benny.

- Bye.

- Bye.

Anyway, I know where you work

cos I saw you on the news.

- You did?

- Yeah.

Good thing Bonnie didn't see you.

I read lips.

Oh, no. That was taken

out of context.

Those reporters can be

real a**holes, real irritating.

Hey, hey.

- I wanted to see how you were doin'.

- I'm OK. I'm doing good.

It's not like I wanted to go out...

...tonight... around 8.00.

Oh! Oh. Yeah, well.

So what are you doing

for dinner tonight?

- Tonight?

- Around 8.00.

As a matter of fact, I have no plans.

Great. I'll call you, and we'll make

a plan for a place to go.

OK. All right.

(whistling)

Give me a kiss, baby.

Take a bow, baby.

(Benny) Yeah, yeah! Way to go.

Hey, Moss, heard you got yanked. Sorry.

Hey, that's too bad, John.

You gotta be Casanov.

F***ing A.

Hey, Casanov. You look

a lot like that actor.

- Yeah, Nick Lang.

- Only shorter.

(Grainy) A lot shorter.

OK, ladies, let's get

some real work done here.

Tea break's over. Party Crasher briefing

in the squad room. Let's go.

Psst.

I really am Nick Lang.

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Aagh!

Lieutenant Moss, I haven't been

this jazzed since the Golden Globes.

I mean, a cop like you

showing me the streets.

The two of us comparing scars.

I have had a couple of scrapes myself.

I got rope burns on Smoking Gun II.

I chafed for a month. It was terrible.

This place is great.

The look, the textures...

- (farts)

... the aroma.

I mean, it's like a movie,

it's so real.

And you don't have

to worry about me screwing up.

I did my homework. I know

police procedures, police lingo...

Hey, homeboy!

I'm in great shape. My trainer's

got me on Nautilus and the StairMaster...

...so you don't have

to worry about Nick Lang.

Son of a b*tch!

Caught me off guard there.

You know, Lieutenant,

I can't help but notice...

...that I'm doing most of

the talking here, which is fine.

I guess you're not a morning

person, and can I relate to that!

Before Esperanza brings me that first cup

of cappuccino, I am toast. Forget about it.

It's decaf. My nutritionist

is cutting down my caffeine.

Whoa!

Turned a little early there.

I was wondering. In order to capture

the essence of the police experience...

...do I get a gun?

For realism.

I mean, Lieutenant...

...it's not like

I'm gonna use the thing.

Although bullets would be nice.

Not if you tied my tongue

to your tailpipe and drove me...

...naked across a field of

broken glass. No, no, no!

- Is this about the actor?

- I gave the maggot a chance.

I got to the bathroom and back.

He doesn't belong here.

He belongs in never-never land...

...with his assistants, his maid...

...and the guy who wipes his ass

after he pinches off his loaf, OK?

- This is about the actor.

- He wants to carry a loaded weapon.

- Send that little jizzball in here.

- Thank you.

Excuse me, gents.

Sorry to interrupt.

- Hi, Captain Brix?

- Yeah.

Nick Lang. I understand

you're in on our secret.

Dave Dinkins sends his best, by the way.

Listen, I just wanted to thank you

for all your help in making this possible.

I gotta tell you.

My wife's crazy about you.

We are really big fans!

- Well, uh, what's your wife's name?

- Norma.

If it wasn't for people like you and Norma,

I'd be digging ditches. So, thanks.

Hey. Wow. I just got a great idea.

You and Norma...

- Do you have kids?

- Uh, no...

You and Norma come out to the coast,

see the premiere of the movie.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes