49 Up Page #6

So when the tank is full

after naught hours...

That motto "Water

weareth away a stone

by dripping upon it,

not by smashing it"

was, as a motto for teaching,

that you kept on teaching them,

and that eventually

it would get through,

and the pupils would change

and learn and develop and so on.

But I think in the end

the reverse happened.

That water dripping

on me wore me away.

I just thought, "I don't think

I can do this till I'm 60,

and therefore I'll have

to do something else."

Do your old friends give you a

hard time about what you've done?

They certainly do.

They absolutely do.

They say, oh, you know, "Have we joined

the tory party, the golf club, the masons?"

"You're driving a much better car

than you used to" and so on.

Well, my girlfriend is in Africa,

And I won't - I don't think I'll have

another chance of seeing her again.

Have you got any girlfriends?

No, no, not yet.

I'm sure it will come, but not yet.

I mean, I do think a lot of

people think too much about it.

I think I would very

much like to, um...

...Oh, become involved in a family

- my own family, for a start.

That's a need that I feel

I ought to fulfil

and would like to fulfil

and would do it well.

Yes, I haven't got

married or whatever,

and I was supposing, you know, that

that would have been something

which I hoped had happened.

(Michael) You're getting on a bit.

Are you getting worried?

Well, not particularly.

I mean, I'm always optimistic.

I mean, who knows who

I might meet tomorrow?

And in the middle

of a conversation

about something

completely different,

he just asked if, um,

if I'd like to marry him,

and if I hadn't been

listening carefully,

I would have missed it completely.

To love and to cherish.

To love and to cherish.

Till death us do part.

Till death us do part.

Is this a beetroot or something?

I think it's just a weed.

Do you enjoy gardening?

Well, under Penny's

directions, you know,

I do whatever she asks me.

I don't know what to do here,

what order to do things in.

She and her mother

are quite good at this.

So you're the labourer?

Yes, I'm the unpaid labourer,

the serf,

the feudal vassal or whatever.

Well, Penny will give you

the correct medieval terms.

We don't argue very much.

Not really.

I mean, we haven't really had

a sort of full-blown row.

No, our arguments sort of

tend to be two sentences,

and I go off and sulk for 24 hours.

How are you doing, dear?

Fine.

And I think the one

positive influence on him -

I've stopped him apologizing.

When I first knew him, he

kept saying, "Sorry, sorry,"

and apologized for

all sorts of things

that there was no need

to apologize for.

Maybe it's just 'cause

we weren't married then.

Yeah, see, I was winning you over.

Yeah, that's right.

You're the world's greatest cook.

It's only pasta...

But if you have emotional issues,

will you talk about them?

Mm. Well, I have

the usual male reticence

about that kind of thing,

you know.

Great tea.

If Penny really wanted

to give me a hard time,

she'd have to say,

"Talk about your feelings."

That would be about -

That would be worse than

a 24-hour sulk, you know.

I think so, yeah.

I don't know whether...

(Bruce) We may have children.

I don't know.

I mean, if in seven

years' time or so

we're living in a slightly bigger

house with a young family,

that would be nice.

I mean, I don't want to pin all

my hopes on it and nothing happens.

We are quite old.

I can seeing bringing up, say,

teenage children in your 50's

might be a bit strange.

Come on, then, Henry.

Get on.

(boys laughing)

(Michael) Is it more

tiring than you thought?

(Penny) I don't think

until you're doing it

you realize how

sleep-deprived you get

and how totally

exhausted you are

all the time for several years.

I think that came

as rather a shock.

Sometimes I go to bed at 8:30,

which is ridiculous.

In fact, I sometimes go to bed

before Henry and George.

He looks like his father,

doesn't he?

Um, George has got the cheekbones

that run in Bruce's family.

And what have I got?

Uh...

Ooh, that's hard

to answer, darling.

(yelling commands)

We're at my first school, where

I was from about five to eight,

and this is where I

boarded for three years.

Squad, March...

I can remember being happy there.

I can remember also being miserable

because I can remember crying.

Squad, steady!

I always seemed to be beaten,

and I never used to understand why.

Squad, halt!

(Michael) You were

here because, what -

Your parents were...? My parents

were separated and were divorced.

And just to give me a stable

place to be and be educated,

it was a solution

to all those problems.

My heart's desire

is to see my daddy,

who is 6,000 miles away.

I did miss contact

with my father, and...

Well, I say it as a joke

to Penny, you know,

"Time to send them

boarding as I was",

And she says, "Over my

dead body", which is -

But I wouldn't want that, either.

Five years ago the family

moved away from the East End

to be near Bruce's new school.

It's very quiet,

its child-friendly,

and it just feels very safe.

That's really important when

you've got small children -

That the area feels safe.

( piano, percussion)

I mean, what can you give

them that you didn't have?

Contact with a father

that is loving,

and they can realize that

and show that love

to other people

and realize when they're letting

both themselves and me down.

That could be a sort of

guiding light for them.

Do you want any more children?

Well...

Bruce was originally talking

about a cricket team.

He's got his opening batsman,

and that I think is going

to be his lot, frankly.

I want you to play tomorrow.

I'm not gonna drop you

from sarcasm, all right?

I run one of the junior

teams here, the under-13's.

And there'll be nearly 200 boys

there doing that on a Saturday

rather than other things

that could waylay them.

It's that combination

of playing within a team

and the ability to back each

other up and form friendships

that's such a nice thing.

(clapping)

(man) Nice shot.

At weekends, Bruce

plays village cricket.

We don't really mind

who wins and loses,

we obviously prefer

to win, and, you know,

we go on tour every year,

so we go down to Devon.

You know, ever such

a nice bunch of mates,

and I've known some

of them for 25 years.

You can play at a reasonable

level till you're in your 60's.

(Michael) And what about

your batting skills?

I'm mainly a bit of a slogger,

so I tend to bat down

the order, 6, 7, 8.

It can be brief, but the last

time I played, I got 50.

Ooh!

Great goin'!

OK, "From their hiding place

in the bushes, William and..."

Do you have fears

for the future?

Personally I've kind of worried

that the boys will

turn out all right.

I hope they avoid drugs.

To see them sleeping

or carry them around

is just fantastic,

and just the smell of them

and the look of them is just -

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