A Guy Thing Page #7

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Sorry. Tonya. Chicks.

You brought Tonya?

Yeah. I figured|I'd throw her a bone...

before I dumped her.

Hi, Jim.

I need my lipstick, baby.|Where is it?

What the heck?|How'd that get in there?

Hey, Paul.

We met at your bachelor party.|I'm Tonya.

Yeah. I remember.

You! You didn't warn me|about this cuddle monkey.

He's been writing me poems|and sending me flowers.

Whoa, Tonya.|lx-nay on the oem-pay.

Two days and he gave me|the keys to his apartment.

- Really?|- Yeah.

I love you, cuddle monkey.

Love you, too... honey bear.

OK. Good luck.

Maybe I love her a little bit.

You ready?|Let's do this.

I almost forgot.|The minister's sick.

Something about|the food last night.

What are you talking about?

Who's going to marry us?

Showtime.

Who are they?

What the hell is that?

Howard!

I know, I know.|It's rock and roll...

but we just need|to find the beat.

What do you think?|Pretty sweet?

- Is this really necessary?|- Take my arm.

- Take it!|- Take it!

So pretty!

I'm Daddy's little girl,|and you're my great big man.

Now, take me, hold me tight.

One, two, now fly...

Sorry, dear!

You're flying, sweeties!|Can you feel it?

Is this some kind of joke?

This is so embarrassing.

I tried.|People like it, OK?

- It's not that bad.|- It sounds like a clam bake!

I had no choice.|I forgot the string quartet.

I give you one thing to do.

- Why did you pick a band?|- I didn't do it!

Dearly beloved,|we are gathered here today...

in the sight of God...

...in order to join|this woman, Karen...

and this man, Paul...

in holy matrimony.

If there is|anyone here today...

who believes that these two|should not be joined...

for all eternity...

let him speak now|or forever hold his peace.

We're going to give you|another minute or so...

to think about that.

Anybody?

Anyone at all.|Anyone with a reason.

It doesn't even|have to be a good reason.

If anyone even has|a whisper of a feeling...

that's enough.

That's good enough.

I do.

Hi. I'm Paul.

Hi, Paul.

I think I need to tell|you all something...

before we go any further.

What's happening?

I've done some things|this past week...

that I'm not proud of.

And people kept telling me...

"Don't worry about it.|It's normal."

But I think they're wrong.

And I'm going down a road|I don't like.

I don't want to be that guy.

You know what I mean?

This is like an AA meeting.

I was talking about fear|the other day with someone...

and it made me realize|that I can't remember...

the last time I've been afraid.

I mean, really afraid.

I've been playing it safe.

Everything I do is safe.

And marrying Karen...

That's not scary at all.

She's beautiful, she's funny,|she's smart...

she's perfect in so many ways...

but deep down,|we're not right for each other.

Oh, God. Oh, no.

Saying that was scary.

Mr. Minister Ferris?

Yes, Paul.

I don't think Karen and I|should be joined for eternity.

Uh-huh...

What's that, Pete?

I just realized something|about somebody...

and it made me say... Uh-huh.

That's great, but|I'm in the middle of something.

Islands in the stream

That is what we are

No one in between

How could we be wrong?

Sail away with me

To another world

Because we rely on each other

Uh-huh

What I realized is|that I'm in love with Karen.

What the hell is going on here?

Shut your yapping.

Now, this is a wedding.

Paul, would you mind|if I asked Karen to marry me?

Thank you. Karen?

Pete, God, I'd have to...

Well, not right here,|not right now...

but maybe after a few dates.

Oh, Pete!

It's OK. I'm OK.

These are the days.

Kenny, the good news is|we'll still be in-laws.

Lady, you forget somebody?

Stop the cab.

A**hole!

I was gonna wait for you.

You were great in there.

Listen. I just...

I think I just figured|something out back there.

Because what I said...

I don't think I would|have been able to say...

if it wasn't for you.

And it also made me|realize something else.

What?

This.

Where to, Whitey?

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