A Touch of Class Page #2

upside-down look at this lot...

...and started measuring your chair size.

Anything else?

Isn't that enough?

Could you get me one

of those continental weather reports?

Continental weather report.

Excuse me.

What?

Come in.

Good afternoon.

- I have a surprise.

- What?

I've arranged us a week in Spain.

Could you just move,

because I'm trying to sketch.

- Pretty as you are, I can't see through you.

- I'm sorry.

- A week?

- A week.

- I said a weekend.

- You can't just spend a weekend in Spain.

- It takes that long for room service.

- What about my children?

Who will run this place?

Maggie, the shoulder.

You'll love it. Warm winds, great food,

buffet right by the swimming pool.

Big soft towels.

- You can see Gibraltar.

- I would adore to see Gibraltar.

But I have a dog that needs exercise,

a cat that's losing its hair...

...a model who can't stand straight.

Maggie, please.

- There are no problems we can't overcome.

- I wish I could...

Why aren't you at the airport?

Because, Mrs. Allessio, I'm only mortal.

I'm not Apollo.

When God made me,

he gave me hands, not wings.

- What an oversight.

- Just sign it. I've got a car waiting.

- Hello, I'm Cecil.

- Steven Blackburn.

- Buying or selling?

- Begging.

How many times have I told you?

A customs declaration should be typed.

That would take forever, sweetie pie.

I only type with one finger...

...and I've hurt it.

Please don't tell me how.

Vickie, you have a long distance call.

It's New York.

Get that to the airport. Tie it between

your teeth if need be. Teatime, Maggie.

Sam? How are you?

No, I'm fine. Yes. No.

Let them run the ad.

They'll be there 11:00, your time.

Listen, Sam, are you standing up?

Then sit down, because what

I'm about to say will get you very excited.

Guess where I'm going tomorrow. Spain.

- Marbella.

- It's near Mlaga.

It's near Mlaga.

No, I'm not going alone.

I'm going with a fella.

A very classy fella.

That doesn't make you excited.

Sam, you're getting old...

...because it excites the hell out of me.

Yes, I will do that. Goodbye.

I told him you're a classy fella. Are you?

I've got to be.

I live around the corner from Disraeli.

There we are.

Thank you.

Come on, Josie.

Here we are at last. Thank you, dear.

- Gently does it, Gloria.

- Thanks, Daddy.

Don't you think we should have wired

Steve we were coming?

Why spoil his fun?

This way he'll have a lovely surprise.

Good afternoon, I'm Miss Ramos.

Can I help you?

Good afternoon, Miss Ramos,

my name is Blackburn.

Reservations for two round-trip tickets

to Mlaga, night flight tonight.

Thank you, Mr. Blackburn, I'll just check.

The seats are available, sir.

Charge mine to my travel card,

I'll pay cash for the other one.

Why not charge both tickets,

Mr. Blackburn?

This is a business card.

I charge my ticket to the business.

They pay for it and the other is

a surprise vacation trip for my mother.

- How nice. What's your mother's name?

- Vickie.

Vickie Allessio.

- Allessio?

- She remarried.

I'll get the tickets.

Here, one for Mr. Blackburn

and one for Mrs. Allessio.

I'll take that. I'm Mrs. Allessio.

Happy Mother's Day.

Just tell me one thing:

Why must you leave tonight...

...on the very day

my parents arrive for a visit?

Because when the S.S. Sera Magoso

rammed into the S.S. Antonio...

...ripping out its corkscrew

turbine rotor shaft...

...they didn't know about your parents,

or they would've avoided each another.

- You could send Braithwaite there.

- That's all I need now.

Why don't you both go down?

We didn't come to see you.

We came to be with our babies.

I'd love that, Grace,

but Gloria hates the place.

She can't stand the wind, the food.

Isn't that right, dear?

We were there last September.

- It was miserable.

- But in July, it's gorgeous.

Really. You'll enjoy it.

Ask her nice, Steve.

You might have a pretty roommate.

Why not try it, dear?

Maybe in July, it won't have the wind

and the lousy food and the heat.

- The flies.

- You think I can still get a ticket?

- That's another thing.

- That's easy.

- What are you flying?

- Iberian.

- You want me to call?

- No, I'll get it.

- Do you know the number?

- Yes, I do.

If you have any problems,

I know Valdez very well.

He runs the outfit.

He'd be glad to help you.

Valdez. If I need him, I'll call him.

Hello, lberia, this is Mr. Blackburn.

I made a reservation.

Hello, Mr. Blackburn. This is Miss Ramos.

You're still on.

Yes, I'm still on. Our night girl got sick.

I need one more ticket

on the Mlaga flight for Mrs. Blackburn.

Your grandmother?

My wife.

We can confirm that reservation.

The party will be you, your wife,

and your mother.

Thank you, Miss Ramos.

That's that.

Come on, dear. We'd better pack.

Just close the door, please. Come on, dog.

Quick, lovely ride in the car.

In you get. All right.

Good.

Oh, dog.

When are you gonna learn to walk?

God, you're heavy.

Are you mad? What are you doing?

My mother is allergic to cats,

dogs and birds.

- See you next week.

- But I've got a dog, a cat and a bird.

Then you'll have two dogs, two cats

and two birds. Two of everything, Cecil.

Are they housebroken?

I can only vouch for the bird.

My God.

Come along.

Gloria, have I ever criticized you

about the way you raise the children?

- No.

- Never?

But this time you're blowing it.

We'll return to two really screwed-up kids.

You know how your folks treat them.

Bicycles for this. Roller skates for that.

They bribe them for affection.

Remember when Billy came back

from a month with them?

He wouldn't smile until I gave him $3.

I'm telling you.

There's a time to think of yourself

and a time to think of the children.

- What's lberia's number?

- I'll do it.

I suppose there is

only one practical solution.

That's right.

- Hello, lberia, Miss Ramos?

- We'll take the kids with us.

This is Mr. Blackburn,

and we'll take the kids with us.

Take the kids with us?

You're right, darling.

They'll be better off with us.

- Are you serious?

- I'll make some excuse to my parents.

Make the reservation, darling.

Miss Ramos, I'd like to add my son

and daughter to that party.

They're just little children.

Do you take them that late at night?

Yes, and I can confirm that for you now.

Thank you.

We've just been confirmed.

Good.

And please make sure

they clean their teeth. 'Bye.

The airport, please.

Maria, get the children up and packed.

We're taking them to Marbella.

Maria, lay out their beach things.

I'll come and check it all, okay?

- I'll go help Maria.

- Just a second.

Hi, Miss Ramos, this is Mr. Blackburn.

I want two more seats.

Mr. And Mrs. Wendell Thompson.

Yes, Miss Ramos, my in-laws.

- What are you doing?

- Just a minute, Miss Ramos.

You don't think they would miss a chance

to spoil their grandchildren, do you?

They'll be down on the next plane,

if they have to buy the airline.

God, it's turning into a pilgrimage.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes