Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein Page #3

to be. Stop this nonsense!

You're Wilbur Gray?

Yes, sir.

Then you must be Chick Young. So what?

I'm Lawrence Talbot. I've been

looking all over town for you.

You didn't have to look far.

We were in jail. Yes, I know.

I'm the one who telephoned you

not to deliver those bodies.

I knew they were alive! Oh! Oh!

So you thought I was imagining things when

I told you about the fellow eight feet tall...

walking with the stiff legs, and

the other fellow with this here.

Wait! You're crazy,

and so is this screwball!

Look, I have my own troubles.

Worse than you think.

I followed Dracula

all the way from Europe...

because I believe he's going to try

and revive the Frankenstein monster.

We must find him and destroy him

before he can do this! Wait a minute.

Go down to the police, tell them you know

the story about Dracula and the monster.

They'd be very interested. I can't do that.

Because then I'd have

to tell them who I am...

and why I know

what I know.

Soon...

Soon the moon will rise.

I haven't time

to explain.

I've taken the room across the

hall. Here's the key. Lock me in!

Lock you in? Yes, please. Hurry!

It's silly,

but I'll do it.

He's scared too.

Remember, no matter what

you hear or what happens,

don't let me out!

"Lock me in. " That guy

is screwier than you are.

He is not.

He's a nice man.

He's worried about the police getting

him because he knows they're alive.

I'm going to bed.

Well...

Hey,

he forgot his bag.

Mr. Talbot,

you forgot your grip.

Mr. Talbot?

Mr. Talbot?

Now, how'd he

get out of here?

Hmph.

I'll leave him a note.

I left your bag...

in the bedroom.

Wilbur.

I wonder if

he counted these.

He might've.

Aah!

Maybe he didn't.

A fine insurance company

I'm doing business with!

Outsmarted by

a couple of morons!

Those two crooks

got out of jail on bail!

We know, Mr. McDougal,

but you see we...

In fact, I arranged it. Who are you?

This is Miss Raymond, an

investigator from the home office.

It's my job to find

those missing exhibits.

I'm sure I can persuade the chubby

fellow to lead me right to them.

Naturally I couldn't persuade

him very well in jail.

Wilbur, please! I've had

nightmares all night long!

I don't want to hear any more about dead

bodies. I saw what I saw when I saw it.

All right.

Am I glad to see you.

Will you talk to that guy?

Sandra! Darling, I heard what happened.

That's awful. They can't put

my little Wilbur in jail.

They can't, but they did.

Thank you for bailing us out.

I? I only learned

about it this morning.

Didn't the policeman tell you

a lady bailed us out? He did.

Wilbur, you haven't been

untrue to your Sandra?

Sandra, how can you look

me in the face and say that?

How can you look him in

the face period? Hmph.

I came by to remind you about

the masquerade ball tonight.

I was getting ready

to pick up my costume.

Come by for me early,

dearest. About sunset.

Alone.

Good-bye.

What I'd like to know is, what

has he got that I haven't got?

A brain.

Ahh.

A brain.

I'd like to know

where it is.

Oh. She forgot

to kiss me good-bye.

Mmm! Oh, oh.

Now who is this? She's...

She's... She's beautiful.

I'm Joan Raymond.

She's Joan Raymond.

I'm the girl who arranged

your release from jail.

Why should you want

to spring us?

Do you believe in love

at first sight?

Well! As long as you

put it that way, I, uh...

That's what happened

to me.

Wilbur, darling!

Miss Raymond, when did this

mad feeling first come over you?

The instant I saw you in the baggage

room. I knew then that I wanted to spend...

every minute that

I'm in town with you.

You did?

What are we doing tonight?

He's going to a masquerade ball.

But, uh,

I'm not doing anything.

- In that case, you'll be lonesome.

- Well, naturally...

Darling, I haven't been to a masquerade

ball in ages. I was hoping you'd ask me.

Wilbur!

Come here.

Miss Raymond,

will you excuse me?

Oh,

you irresistible boy!

Do you want me? Yes, I

want you. Come over here.

I just wanted to get a good

look at you in the light.

I still don't get it.

Jealous?

Wilbur, I'll have to go out

and get a costume.

That's funny.

I was just going too.

I'll go to my room, pick up a couple

things and meet you in the lobby.

All right.

In the lobby.

I'll get my hat and coat. I'll

be right with you. Excuse me.

Now you've got two dates. What

about Sandra, you bigamist?

Sandra? I don't know.

Joan is awful cute.

All right, you takeJoan, I'll

take Sandra. Oh, Sandra sends me.

Then I'll takeJoan.

Joan sends me too.

Listen, you sawed-off Romeo,

in a minute, I'll send you!

You don't even appeal

to me.

Look, Wilbur, we've always

been pals, haven't we? Yes.

We've always shared and shared

alike, haven't we? Mm-hmm.

Let's be reasonable.

Come on.

I've always shared with you. That you have!

If I had two cigarettes, I'd

give you one. That's right.

If I had two pair of shoes, I'd

give you a pair. Don't I know that?

And if I have two girls... Well?

Why don't you light that cigarette, put on

those shoes and take a walk for yourself?

That's what I'm going to do,

but with you.

This key don't fit.

This is Tal...

Talbot's key.

Hey, we forgot about him.

Boy, what a bender

he must've been on last night!

Hey, Mr. Talbot.

Mr. Talbot!

And I thought you were such

a nice man. Look at yourself.

You're a mess.!

Last night...

I went through another

of my horrible experiences.

Years ago I was bitten

by a werewolf.

Ever since,

when the full moon rises...

I turn into a wolf

myself.

Oh, pal,

that's all right.

I'm sort of a wolf myself.

And here I thought...

I thought that you were the

only one that would believe me,

that you were the one that

knew I spoke the truth.

You have seen...

the living dead.

Mm-hmm.

I came all the way

from Europe...

because Dracula and the

monster must be destroyed.

Together

we must find them!

Let's not start that

all over again.

I can't go. I've got a date.

In fact, I've got two dates.

But you and I... have a date with destiny.

Let Chick go

with destiny.

Won't you please?

Huh?

You kids stay here.

I'm going up and get Sandra.

She's mine too.

Pardon me just a minute.

Wilbur!

Look, you've got Joan and

Sandra. You've got two girls!

How about the two girls we had last

week? Let's not talk about that.

You got no kick comin'. You had

the best lookin' one. So what?

Yours had teeth.

Yours had teeth too.

Did you see that tooth?

I happened to see it.

Mine had so much bridgework, every

time I kissed her I had to pay toll.

What's the use?

Wilbur, can't we both

go along too?

Yes, mon amour. That's

Spanish. That's French.

How do you like that? I speak

French too. You cute devil!

Stop that.

Come on, lead the way. Come on.

Hello.

Hello.

Is Sandra in?

Who?

Sandra.

You mean Dr. Mornay?

If that's what she is, I'm

just what the doctor ordered.

Come in.

Thank you.

I thought Sandra

was your date.

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