Airbag Page #2

Evening, ladies.

lve brought a friend

with bags of money.

Hes getting married Saturday.

Right, marquis?

This ones gonna get his

coffee with two sugars.

Aint he now?

Gently...You like making love dontyou?

Gently.

Poor thing.Where did you get

that anaconda, big boy?

-You come along with me.

-Yes, ladies.

lm arebel

because the world

made me that way.

Because nobody ever

showed me love.

Because nobodys ever

listened to me.

Wow. lts getting as hard as a rock.

This way.

lm a rebel because

lve always been that way.

They refused to give me

what l asked for.

They just failed to understand.

l wanted to be

like any other kid,

any other man

whos happy.

l wanted

to give whats inside me

in return for friendship.

To live

and dream,

and forget rancour,

and sing

and laugh

and give

only

love.

lm married.

Arent they all, honey?

lts just...

Visa card or cash, my love?

Visa or cash?

Ah, now?

ln cash, okay?

Well sort it out later.

But dont make it a habit.

Take your clothes off

and wash it.

Wash what?

Oh, come on, honey.

Ph all the way!

lts freezing!

lm sorry, its a crappy tap.

Did l scald it.

lll never get

the hang of it.

Now with a nice bit of soap.

l dont like being kissed.

Stop, stop!

lll touch you.

-Are your hands clean?

-Of course.

Oh, honey...

it feels like gum.

Well...

Dry yourself.

You gonna give me the money?

lts there.

Excuse me.

Araceli de Alda? ls she your wife?

Yeah.Well, not yet, but...

You should have hangers

in a place like this.

Well...?

Did you enjoy it?

Yeah, it was wild.

Just great.

Youre quite a performer.

Maybe a bit short.

Timewise l mean.

Short but sweet, as they say.

Youre so wise, my love.

And so virile.

l do my best.

Was it really too short?

Hey, youre a romantic.

Youre a sweet guy.

Do you want to do it again?

l think its getting a bit late.

Oh, come on, honey.

Talking is nice too.

l love your accent.

Fuckings not everything.

To making love, l mean.

What do you mean love?

Youre nuts. Thats great.

Ask, ask, lll tell you.

What would you like to know?

One, two, three...

Four.

Pump in,

ventricular,

Pump out,

auricular...

Ventricular

Auricular.

Come on.

lnhale, exhale...

Very good. Youre doing great.

Now l think...

Whats wrong, my love?

You dont like rubbers,

do you?

Yes, l have to relax.

Better darling?

lm relaxing...

Come here,

give me your finger.

Suck my finger, darling.

Wont you do it for me?

-Suck my finger.

-No

Cheers! To eternal screwing

and UFOs.

And f***ing them till they

drop.

To death!

Boy, did l sweat!

l f***ed her brains out!.

And what apiece of ass,

eh Konra?

Yeah, they were great.

She was gorgeous.

Look at him, Konra.

Not a peep out of him.

Did you score then?

Well, not exactly.

Yes, l did. l mean...

Juantxo, whats the matter?

Are you OK?

My engagement ring.

F***ing kids!

Go kill yourselves!

What happened?

lm sorry about the ring.

-Why?

-Because it was my idea.

Who hit you?

A lot of guys are into

violence.

lt turns them on.

lt was my boss.

For not charging a client.

Look, about the ring...

lm not talking about

the damned ring.

Do you like your boss?

Sh*t!

Wait...

l like you. A lot.

l thought you were Cuban.

l like you too.

Youre fantastic.

lt may sound like an excuse

but it was my first time.

You were great.

Youre an angel, but l dont

have your ring

l didnt think so.

Whos got it?

lts dangerous.

Please.

Somebody whos into violence.

Your boss?

Whats his name?

Call him over.

-Why?

-l know how to hit too.

Mr Villambrosa isnt here.

Where is he?

Can you really fight?

Sure.

lm a karate black belt.

Hes at the Kokotxa club.

Do you like hitting women?

Thats a shame.

l deserve to be hit.

Poor creature, so full of vice!

Well, thanks, lve got to go.

Bye. Take care, karate kid.

Bye, Sweetheart.

Theyll kill me.

Guys, its all your fault.

-Why did we have to go there?

-Cool it.Well find it.

Nuisance, 6 letters.

Harass.

And did she use her finger

on you, too?

-None of your business.

-What do you mean?

lf you like it up the rear...

Up yours, Pako!

Thats what l mean.

lts not normal.

lts not normal?

All right, its not normal!

Hey, guys, dont get uptight.

Why dont we just let fate

take its course?

According to the theory

of chaos...

Right! You got it.

See, Juantxo, how you get

desperate so easily.

Thats what creates chaos.

Just relax

Listen to some music.

Relax? Youre gonna f***ing

kill us!

No f***ing way. This cars

what you call life insurance!

Airbags on the drivers and

passengers sides.

Great. ln the back its

my ass thats on the line.

-Dont say that word again!

-l didnt say ass.

-Yes, you did.

-No, l didnt.

-You did!

-l didnt!

Harass. l said harass.

Konrad!

Nuisance... six letters.

Harass.

You said it.

-Crash... collision.

-How many letters?

Stop!

Sh*t!

DANGER.

BATHlNG PROHlBlTED

Sh*t!

Today is not our day.

lve wrecked the car!

F*** me!

Thats all we needed.

So much for the airbags.

Hell, why didnt they work?

Driver, passenger,

life insurance...

Shut up, will you! All this is

for your f***ing ring!

And whose idea was it to...

To what? Stick your finger up

her ass or yours?

Up your old mans ass!

Any body hurt?

Not yet, but...

Hey! Are you Villambrosa?

Jesus, do you know me?

No, l dont.

That ring belongs to me.

Where have you been putting

your finger?

You should be ashamed of

yourself!

Cool it, Juanxto. lll handle

this.

Hell tell you.

-l cant hear you.

-Hell tellyou!

Well, Pako decided to organize

a stag party

-By the way, lm Konrado.

-And hes Pako, the driver.

Sh*t, Konrado! Cut the chat!

lf you think its so easy,

you explain it.

Where was l?

Well, when Juantxo

stuck his...

The Marquise de Alda gave it

to him as her dowry.

Yes, that engagement ring.

So the ring belongs to

that young man?

Please give it back. lts got

huge sentimental value.

What kind of

huge value?

l dunno, millions.

How much was it, Juanxto?

Hey, you!

Come back!

Shitbag!

Hey!

Thief!

Bastard!

Hey!

Shitbag!

Oh, sh*t, the airbags!

Just when we needed them.

Pako, will you

stop this thing!

Stop this! Sh*t!

For Gods sake!

lm suffocating!

Try and breathe.

-l cant!

-Take it easy.

lts got limited dimensions

and its explosion-proof.

Hey, mister!

Stop it!

Thats the way it is!

Lets go.

l cant take it anymore.

-The damage doesnt look too bad!

-Are you stupid?

Konra, wherere you going?

Theres a huge chance that

itll explode.

Why should it explode?

-Like in Starsky and Hutch.

-lf you say so.

Sh*t! run!

Run!

Rats!

Filthy blackmailers!

Some people have got

no scruples.

30 million for

some crap photos

that are out of focus.

That f***ing kid

was pretty cute. lncredible!

Hello? Yes, yes.

lts Mr Villambrosa.

Palomeque, watch the puddle.

What about the briefcase?

l wanted the thirty million

here today.

Today, tod..ay!

Look, Mr Candidate,

l have business in Portugal.

And lve got problems with Souza.

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