Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day Page #6

And now Emily's gonna miss her play...

and Anthony's not gonna be

able to drive Celia to the prom.

He's been waiting all year to make out

with her in the back of the van.

Okay, we don't need to hear that.

Okay, I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry.

Just forget my party.

It'll be a disaster anyway.

Apology not accepted.

Look...

this day is not ruined,

because this day is not over yet.

Dad, you're so right.

I may be sick, but there's no

way I'm missing opening night.

I may have wrecked the van...

but I'm not missing prom with Celia.

I can't.

Look, we are not going to let

this day get the better of us.

It's like last week at Target

when Dad lost Trevor for 45 minutes.

- Okay.

- Yeah.

And the store manager

wanted to call the cops...

but Dad said, "No!"

- We found him.

- "We are gonna keep looking."

We will keep looking for my baby?

"We will find my baby."

They sealed the doors. It was fine.

- What's wrong with you?

- Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Okay, guys, okay.

It's past 3:
00, so if we're gonna go,

we gotta do this now.

Are we ready, Coopers?

All right! Clap those hands

if you believe in fairies!

Emily, are you okay?

Mom! Positivism. Let's do this thing.

Get in there, get in there.

- Buckle, buckle!

- Buckle, buckle!

Go, go, go, go, go!

It seems we may

have accidentally given your tux away.

Well, get it back.

Sir, I cannot un-tux a client.

My sister's Peter Pan

and we've got 10 minutes till curtain.

You better un-tux something.

There is one option.

You might be able to pull it off.

All right, fire up. Come on, let's go.

Coopers on the move!

We got it.

All right. Anthony, find a seat.

Break a leg, Em.

I'm here!

Get some more of this.

Honey? Hon, hon.

Em. Em. Sweetie,

I think you've had plenty of that.

It's okay, honey.

- Peter Pan is here, everybody!

- Excuse me, people.

- Everybody, Peter's here!

- Excuse us, excuse us.

- You look so pretty.

- Superstar coming through.

Superstar

Excuse me, everyone.

All right.

I love your outfit.

Okay.

I said 3:
00.

You have no idea

the kind of day we are having.

It's a miracle we're here.

Well, you're late,

which is not professional behavior.

No! And it's not professional...

because this is an eighth

grade production of Peter Pan.

And if you could take

one look at our minivan...

Mr. Brand, I am not somebody

that you wanna mess with right now.

So grab her some green

tights and a harness...

and fire up her Tinker Bell!

As soon as you have your costumes on...

go for your hair.

Way to go, Daddy-O!

- Break a leg, sweetie.

- Good luck!

Show's about to start, Emily.

We've got to get you going.

Everything's under control.

Yeah. You okay?

Yeah.

- I'm excited about this.

- Yeah.

It's gonna be great.

Yeah, I think so.

Good night, Mother. Good night, Father.

Now, you two be quiet

and I'll tell you a story.

What sort of story?

The best sort.

One filled with magic and fairies

and savage pirates...

called Never Never Land.

Hi, hello!

No!

I'm a little boy named Peter Pan!

- Hello! How are you?

- What's wrong with her?

It must be the cough syrup.

So good to see you.

Peter Pan is in the house!

Think of a wonderful thought

Get the hook and get her down!

Any merry little thought

- Oh, no!

- Hook her down! Hook her!

I'm floating. I'm floating.

Get her!

Reindeer in the sky

Let go!

- Get her down!

- Let go of me!

Let go of me right now!

Let go!

Everybody, fly!

She's okay.

She's all right. There she is.

Ta-da!

Thank you, everybody. Thank you.

Oh, my God, Josephine, hi!

Daniel, hi!

Hi! Hello, everybody.

Take some pixie dust!

Thank you, thank you!

How much cough syrup did she have?

Clearly, way too much.

There she is.

- Hi!

- Hey, honey.

Wow.

Well, that was

an incredible thing to watch.

I think I broke Captain Hook's nose.

Sweetie, it's not your fault.

We shouldn't have let

you go out there today.

No, you can't fool around

with medicine, hon.

Emily. Emily.

Dude, you crushed it!

I gotta change into my tux.

- Mr. Brand?

- Not now.

Can't speak.

Honey, it's all going to be okay.

Trust me.

Love you, Dad.

Love you, too.

Okay, sweetie.

Okay, honey. That felt good.

You get that out.

Let's go outside and get you some air.

I'm sorry.

No, honey, it's fine.

- Okay.

- It's fine.

When did she start eating carrots?

Your sister has excellent aim.

Can I have another towel?

Thanks. Oh, man.

Hello?

Hey, Greg.

No, now's a fine time.

You did?

No, I'm not surprised. I thought

it was a killer interview also.

You wanna meet? Okay.

Well, now actually

isn't a really good time.

No. No, no, no.

- Go, go, go!

- Drinks at Nagamaki?

- Go!

- Could you hold on a second, Greg?

Alexander, I appreciate

what you're trying to do...

but our plate is full.

We got too much

going on tonight, kiddo.

Dad, curse or no curse...

just go for it!

Greg, we're gonna go for it.

Yeah, I will see you

at Nagamaki later, okay?

Okay. Good. I look forward to it.

Thanks. Bye-bye.

Awesome!

Okay. I reek.

You do. Look. Wait.

This looks like your size.

I'm not going to wear a pirate blouse.

Pirate or puke, your choice.

It's okay, Em.

It took a lot of courage to fly

out on that stage tonight.

Do you have any idea

how proud we are of you?

You've always just

put yourself out there.

You are fearless.

You're willing

to show the world who you really are.

That's amazing.

But if you're ever

about to take the stage on Broadway...

and you decide to drink a bottle

of cough syrup, give me a call.

Let me talk you out of it.

Ladies, care to do some pillaging?

Okay. All right.

All right, how did I end up blue?

Celia's gonna love it.

It's totally retro.

Just own it, kiddo.

You look ridiculous.

Go get your Duchess, Duke.

My little boy...

in a tuxedo, going to prom...

in sneakers.

Wow. You look amazing.

What are you wearing?

You look like Willy Wonka.

I'm trying something different.

What's going on?

Yeah, I kind of failed my driver's test.

You look beautiful, Celia.

'Course I do.

Yeah, that's a sick dress.

I hope this isn't

too much wind for you, Celia.

It's actually helping

with the vomit smell.

So is everybody hungry?

- I am.

- I am.

They're coming to dinner?

Don't worry.

They're not gonna sit at our table.

- How about some music?

- Yes. Yes.

No surprise, the radio's broken.

This is just something that we

do for fun sometimes.

Figured it'd make you laugh.

We're going to Nagamaki!

What? Are you kidding me?

- Nagamaki!

- They cook it on the table.

They cook it right on the table.

Like a fondue, but not.

Supposed to be

a very authentic Japanese restaurant.

- Be careful.

- Yes, sir.

Thank you.

Konnichiwa. Welcome to Nagamaki!

Table for two, please.

Right this way.

There they are.

You okay?

Yeah.

Honey, come on.

Ben, you're the smartest guy I know.

You're literally a rocket scientist.

You've got these guys.

Is it better tucked in?

You hesitated. Here we go.

- Go get them, buccaneer.

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