Alice in Wonderland Page #4

each day. Every day has a title and an illustration.

ALICE:

It’s a calendar.

THE CATERPILLAR:

Compendium. It tells of each and

every day since the Beginning.

WHITE RABBIT:

Today is Griblig day in the time of

the Red Queen.

He points to the illustration.

19 CLOSE ON THE ORACULUM 19

It shows all of them, including Alice, peering at the

Oraculum, at that exact moment.

10/28/08 Blue Revised Pages 19.

20 EXT. THE MUSHROOM FOREST - CONT. 20

THE CATERPILLAR:

Show her the Frabjous day.

White Rabbit turns the scroll further into the future.

TWEEDLEDEE:

Frabjous being the day you slay the

Jabberwocky.

ALICE:

Sorry? Slay the...what?

21 CLOSE ON THE ORACULUM - HER POV 21

The illustration is animated. The Jabberwocky is tall as a

dinosaur with reptilian wings, scales, long sharp claws, a

pronged tail and a vest. It hisses! A Knight with long

blonde hair in chain mail fights him with a shining sword.

TWEEDLEDUM (O.S.)

That being you there with the Vorpal

sword.

TWEEDLEDEE (O.S.)

No other swords can kill the

Jabberwocky. Nohow.

TWEEDLEDUM (O.S.)

If it ain’t Vorpal, he ain’t dead.

As she swings the sword, she reveals her face to the readers.

The girl is unmistakably Alice, with bloodlust in her eye.

22 EXT. THE MUSHROOM FOREST - CONT. 22

Alice backs away.

ALICE:

That’s not me.

THE DORMOUSE:

I know!

WHITE RABBIT:

Resolve this for us, Absolem. Is she

the right Alice?

The CATERPILLAR looks Alice in the eye.

(CONTINUED)

10/28/08 Blue Revised Pages 20.

22 CONTINUED:
22

THE CATERPILLAR:

Not Hardly.

He blows smoke, obliterating himself from view.

THE DORMOUSE:

I told you!

WHITE RABBIT:

Oh dear!

TWEEDLEDUM:

I said so.

TWEEDLEDEE:

No, I said so.

TWEEDLEDUM:

Contrariwise, you said she might be.

TWEEDLEDEE:

No. You said she would be if she was.

THE FLOWERS:

Little imposter! Pretending to be

Alice! She should be ashamed!

WHITE RABBIT:

I was so certain of you.

They all glare at her as if it is somehow her fault.

ALICE:

I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be the

wrong Alice. Wait, this is my dream.

I’m going to wake up now and you’ll

all disappear.

She closes her eyes and pinches herself. She opens them

again. The animals are still there.

ALICE (CONT’D)

That’s curious.

She pinches herself again. The animals just look at her.

ALICE (CONT’D)

Pinching usually does the trick.

The Dormouse pulls a long sharp hat pin from her scabbard.

(CONTINUED)

10/28/08 Blue Revised Pages 21.

22 CONTINUED:
(2) 22

THE DORMOUSE:

I could stick you if that would help.

ALICE:

It might actually. Thank you.

THE DORMOUSE:

My pleasure.

She stabs her in the ankle with relish. Alice yelps. But

instead of a small sound, a THUNDEROUS ROAR is heard and the

BANDERSNATCH smashes through a high wall.

TWEEDLEDEE:

Bandersnatch!

It has a huge furry body with the head of a rabid bulldog.

Drool oozes from his squashed muzzle. His fur is caked with

blood and filth. His teeth are shark like and broken,

stained with blood. A foul stench emanates from him.

Everyone scatters. But they’re intercepted by RED KNIGHTS

wearing the RED QUEEN’S CREST: a heart in flames. The

Knights capture the fleeing animals. A PIG and a FLAMINGO are

caught and thrown into a caged wagon. The Dodo gets away. A

Knight grabs the White Rabbit by his leg, lifting him up...

WHITE RABBIT:

Unhand me! I do not enjoy being...

He’s tossed into the caged wagon with the others.

23 EXT. THE GARDEN PATH - CONT. 23

Alice runs. The Bandersnatch thunders after her. She stops.

ALICE:

Wait. It’s only a dream. Nothing can

hurt me.

She turns around to face it. The Dormouse watches from behind

a tree.

THE DORMOUSE:

What is she doing?

The Bandersnatch opens its drooling muzzle to eat Alice.

ALICE (CONT’D)

Can’t hurt me...can’t hurt me.

(CONTINUED)

10/28/08 Blue Revised Pages 22.

23 CONTINUED:
23

THE DORMOUSE:

Run, you great lug!

The Dormouse groans. She leaps onto the Bandersnatch, pulls

herself up, hand-over-hand to its shoulder and drives her

hatpin into its eye. It bellows! She tries to pull the

hatpin out, but the whole eye pops out. Bandersnatch howls

and whips around raking Alice’s arm with its long claws. She

runs.

24 EXT. THE MUSHROOM FOREST - ON THE ORACULUM 24

A large HAND with RED BIRTHMARK reaches down and picks up the

abandoned Oraculum. The grim KNAVE OF HEARTS, ILOSOVIC

STAYNE, has a flaming red birth mark which covers half his

face and hands. He looks through the scroll and sees

something that alarms him. He tucks it into his saddle bag

and rides away.

25 EXT. THE CROSSLING - DAY 25

Alice runs down the path, but it diverges in two directions.

A road sign points south to “SNUD” and east to “QUEAST”.

TWEEDLEDUM:

This way! East to Queast!

TWEEDLEDEE:

No, south to Snud!

He pulls her one way. Tweedledee pulls her the other. There’s

an ear-slitting SCREECH. The enormous JUBJUB BIRD lands in

front of them. It’s part monkey-eating eagle and part

ostrich. It makes a “JUB’JUB” sound as it snatches the

Tweedles in its claws and takes flight.

26 EXT. FLYING WITH THE JUBJUB BIRD 26

The JubJub flies over the barren red earth of Crims with the

Tweedles in its claws toward Salazen Grum and the castle of

the Red Queen on the shore of the Crimsen sea. Her flag with

the Heart in Flames flies atop the spires.

27 INT. THE RED QUEEN’S GREAT HALL/THRONE ROOM - DAY 27

A long hall is lined with FROG FOOTMEN with A FISH BUTLER.

The RED QUEEN’S angry scream comes from behind closed doors.

The doors bang open to reveal IRACEBETH the RED QUEEN. She

has a huge oversized head, extremely large features, and

bright red hair.

(CONTINUED)

10/28/08 Blue Revised Pages 23.

27 CONTINUED:
27

RED QUEEN:

Someone stole three of my tarts!

She leans into the face of a frog.

RED QUEEN (CONT’D)

Did you steal them?

FOOTFROG #1

No, your Majesty.

She walks the row, studying the face of each frog. At the

end, she whirls to leer into the face of one terrified frog.

RED QUEEN:

Did you steal my tarts?

FOOTFROG #3

No, Your Majesty.

She wipes a telltale bit of jam from the side of its mouth.

She holds her finger up and sniffs the juice.

RED QUEEN:

Squimberry juice.

FOOTFROG #3

I was so hungry!

RED QUEEN:

OFF WITH HIS HEAD!

Red Knights converge on the guilty Frog.

FOOTFROG #3

No! Please! I have little ones to

look after!

The Knights drag him out. The Queen turns to the Fish Butler.

RED QUEEN:

Go to his house and collect the little

ones. I love tadpoles on toast points

almost as much as I love caviar.

The Fish butler suppresses his revulsion and anger.

KNAVE OF HEARTS:

Majesty?

The Queen’s face lights up to see him. She turns flirty.

(CONTINUED)

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27 CONTINUED:
(2) 27

RED QUEEN:

Ilosovic Stayne...you knave, where

have you been lurking?

She holds out her hand. He kisses it, barely. She sighs.

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