American Psycho II: All American Girl Page #6

soon be calling back you.

Mom, you have got to

change that message.

I will come by around 5:30 to

pick you up for your big date.

And I will get you back in time

for Murder She Wrote. Bye.

-Bon appetit.

-Happy birthday, Mom.

- Oh!

- It's gorgeous.

This is the most beautiful thing

I have ever received in my life.

How did you afford it?

-Stainless steel.

-It's silver, you old lump.

Stainless steel. Silver has...

that distinguished look about it.

Anyway, as I was saying before,

I said to Leora she ought to have

it looked at immediately.

So what does she do?

She waits an entire month.

And when she sees the doctor,

he orders a biopsy and it

comes back positive.

Well, could you just die?

If she had taken my advice,

she could have avoided this mess!

I know we will eat dinner at some point.

-The question is, when?

-I will go use the restroom.

Don't forget to wash your hands.

Now, where is my steak knife?

My mother drives me crazy.

That sounds clich,

but how many people envision

carving into their mother's neck

and yanking out her vocal cords?

Or ripping her tongue out and

serving it to her as an early-bird special?

-Bonsoir.

-Bonsoir. Daniels. Table for two.

I have got a table right here for you.

After you.

Why don't you sit on the other side?

Get a view of the whole thing.

Excusez-moi, garcon.

Could I have un autre, uh...

steak knife, s'il-vous-plait?

Oh.

-Of course. Voila, madame.

-Merci.

How about a table closer to the window?

-That would be very nice.

-Okay, I will ask.

-Good evening.

-Good evening.

I was wondering if we could get a

table closer to the window.

That section is closed for Spring Break.

Sorry.

No problem. I understand.

This table is fine.

Good.

Can I get you something to drink?

I will have a whiskey sour. Mom?

I will need some water to take my pills.

As I stare at myself in the mirror,

I realize I can't let my mother

get the best of me.

I am Robert Starkman's next TA.

And that's where

I will focus my energies.

I should set up a meeting

with Bobby when I get back.

Maybe we can brainstorm at

his cabin tonight.

I will make him my special eggs.

Sorry.

Ready to order?

Maybe you'd give us some more time?

Sure. Of course.

I will be just over there.

-Take your time.

-Thank you.

-Cheers.

-Cheers, my dear.

Oh my God.

Hello, Dr. Daniels.

It's great to see you.

And this must be your mother.

Hello, Mrs. Daniels.

How are you doing?

I am fine, dear.

Oh my God.

I just love that hat.

I'd kill for a hat like that.

It is just so cute!

I have to be getting back to my table.

-It was great meeting you.

-It was nice meeting you too.

See you later, Eric.

Who is that pretty girl?

A new girlfriend, I hope.

No.

She's a patient.

A very sick patient.

-Excuse me for a second.

-Of course.

-I will be right back.

-Yes.

Excuse me.

Sorry to interrupt your dinner.

I am a friend of your

daughter's. Ms. Newman,

could I have a word

with you for a moment?

Sure.

Mom, Dad, I will be just a minute.

Excuse me.

That's it. I am eating.

Didn't he call her a different name?

You have some explaining to do.

First of all, you insult me.

Then you threaten my mother.

You're seeing a married man.

Then I hear you have hung yourself.

And you act like nothing happened.

-What's going on?

-You heard I hung myself?

Yes.

Eric, why would you say that?

Let's say a mutual

friend told me he found you.

Dead.

-Is this some sort of sick joke?

-He never found me. He found her.

Her who?

It doesn't even matter anymore.

It's not important.

What's important is my

mom's birthday, and she's here.

I will catch up with you later.

Goodbye.

Honey, why did he call

you Ms. Newman?

I don't know. Could we just eat?

-I have to go home and pack.

-Can't you cancel?

We never get a chance to see you.

I wish I could, but I can't.

-They're very special plans.

-A boy?

-Yes, it's a boy.

-What's his name?

Bobby Starkman.

Bobby?

-Hey, Jim.

-Dr. Daniels.

A cup of apricot-peppermint blend?

Thank. We might have a bit of trouble.

-Is Harv in?

-He's in the back.

If it's not Sigmund Freud himself!

-What's the good word?

-Not much.

I want to file a missing person's

report on Robert Starkman.

-You're kidding?

-I wish I were.

His wife called 20 minutes ago to

do the same thing.

He didn't show up at his in-laws

upstate like he was supposed to.

-You're kidding?

-I wish I were.

-It's been a crazy year.

-What do you mean?

It's the third MPR we have filed

this year. Right, Jimmy?

-That's a record around here.

-Who else was there?

Let's have a look.

I have got a brand new one here.

A woman, Gerty Fleck,

from Student Services.

Just up and disappeared.

And of course, that Newman girl.

Newman, yeah,

that was seven months ago......

...A student, Rachael Newman,

disappeared.

The first day of the semester.

Jimmy and I toddled up on

campus to check it out.

And guess what?

I am Sheriff Winslow,

and this is Deputy Duncan.

Just looking for a--

-Are you Rachael Newman?

-Yeah. What's wrong?

We're checking on a MPR on yourself.

You're not missing, are you?

No, I am okay.

She was there, unharmed.

Are you sure

I can't offer you some tea?

No, thanks, Jim.

I actually know

this Rachael Newman girl.

To be honest, I don't trust her.

Are you telling me the parents

just dropped the report?

I never said nothing about parents.

The Newman girl,

she was an orphan.

The report was filed by

some student friends of hers.

-But it was a false alarm.

-How do you know it was her?

There's only one Rachael

Newman registered at school.

Can I convince you guys

to come to the campus with me

to make sure everything's okay?

Yeah, no problem, Doc.

-Should I get in here?

-That's fine.

You're reached Professor Starkman in

the Behavioral Sciences Department.

Please, leave a message.

Hey, it's me.

I am almost done packing.

I will be there soon.

I hope you're as excited as I am.

If you need me to go to the store,

I will be here another five minutes.

Otherwise, see you soon.

I love you. Bye.

God, you stink.

Now, how did you get open?

Trying to sneak out on me?

I just brought you up and you're

already causing problems.

Don't fall apart on me now, Rach.

Wow! I like your room.

Actually,

I like your name too.

Rachael.

You don't mind if I borrow it?

Well, this is a wild-goose chase,

I guess.

-Have a good day.

-You too. Thank you, Officers.

Hey, Mom, I know I have been

out of touch,

but I got accepted to West Washington.

I know. Can you believe it?

It's so sad about your parents.

That car accident thing and all.

So tragic.

Must have been hard growing

up an orphan.

But, I am glad you shared it with me.

Oh, Bobby.

I told you to get your beauty sleep.

We have a long night ahead of us.

You're disgusting.

So, I am two cans of gas and a

brick away from Quantico.

I just have to dot the I's and cross

the T's, and I am home free.

Look out!

-Jesus!

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